Child of Nobody
by BarracudaHeart
Summary: A very worrisome Katyusha finally tells Ivan the truth of his whereabouts and the secret of Mother Russia. Her reasons for this are not good. M for very mature elements, and angst galore.
1. Letters to Nobody

**This is a story involving Ukraine mostly, and Russia. There isn't much historical accuracy to this story, but I'll add little bits here and there maybe. Also, General Winter will be a key role in this story as well. **

**This story doesn't have my exact views on things in fanon, but it's more of a 'what if' situation.**

**There isn't going to be too many pairings in this story, except for one that is absolute crack, and made just for the story. UPDATE: There will be the pairing of Canada/Ukraine in this story.**

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><p><em>Letter Written January 15th, 20XX<em>

_My name is Ivan Braginski, the Russian Federation._

_I am about six feet and five inches, blonde hair and purple eyes. It's no surprise I'm so tall, since I am one of the largest nations. Some say I look like a child, but then they get scared when I smile at them. I don't intend to hurt anyone, really, I never do. It's only when people make me sad or angry that I do things I don't want to. Like when people call me fat (I'm not, I'm just big boned) or they say I'm a terrible person. I'm not. I like talking to people, I like animals, food, and children. What's so bad about me?_

_I am well over thousands of years old, but I appear forever young, so it seems. I have lived through many lifetimes, and only have I enjoyed so few of them. When it seemed that the twentieth century was getting better for me, the Cold War came through, and ruined it. It's been rough and painful, but I do look forward to a glorious future._

_I owe much of my success to my family, who kept me growing strong when I was very young. I especially owe it to my eldest sister Ukraine, or as she is called, Katyusha. She's rather...odd. It kind of makes me sad to think that after all these years, she seems to have become such a crybaby. And crybabies are weak. Plus, she doesn't talk to me much, because her boss won't allow it. We were close when we lived together in the Soviet Union, but by the end of the Cold War, she seemed a bit more fragile, and a bit scared. I still don't know why...we were all so happy together, weren't we. But I guess it doesn't matter anymore, what happened then. The Soviet Union failed, and I have to try harder for success in the future._

_But I really am grateful for everything she's done for me and my younger sister Belarus. She was my first caretaker for many, many years. Along with little Natalia, we were very close, almost joined at the hip you might say. Ukraine has been much like a mother for me. My own mother died when I was born, and Ukraine was in her late teens (appearance-wise) by then. So she took care of me. How we found Belarus, I don't quite remember. Sestra seems to remember but won't tell Natalia...strange._

_Natalia's been telling me that Katyusha's been acting very different lately. Which is very odd, since Natalia doesn't pay much attention to her anyway. In fact, Natalia doesn't really like Katyusha, which is kind of sad, since we all used to be so close. I just hope little sister gathers her marbles together so it can be like it used to._

_But Katyusha acting strange, as I was saying...Natalia told me that Katyusha seemed to be not feeling well as of recent times, and seemed to be a little more quiet. I hope she's all right. Perhaps age is starting to catch up..._

Russia capped his pen, and folding the letter, put it in his drawer. The drawer was already filled with other self written notes, but it was able to fit that last one in there. He didn't have a specific reason as to why he wrote the letters to nobody, he just did. Maybe so he could look at them in the future, and reminisce about the older times.

Standing up from his chair, he stretched his back a little, giving a satisfying crack, and pushed his chair in. He then put his boots on, tying the laces, and put on his light beige coat. It really suited his new scarf and gloves, which were plaid and purple. He drew back the curtains from his window, leaving the cloudy sun to shine through with a blinding light. Gray clouds frosted the sky, but the sun was still glowing brightly.

_At least it's bright._, thought Russia with a smile. He then left his study, going down the stairs. He was in a good mood, despite the fact that he was alone in his house now. For years, he had been alone, ever since the Union split up, and his family left his home. But he didn't feel too lonely right now. The sunflowers were starting to grow, and they looked very nice and golden.

Russia went out the back door, and taking the watering can on the front step, went to the flower boxes on the sides of his house, and tipping the can, sprinkled a little water on his precious plants. He smiled warmly, thinking of how wonderful they'd look.

As he smiled blissfully unaware, a cold air began to quickly breeze through, leaving a rush of flash freezing air to burst through the trails of water from the can. Russia opened his eyes in confusion, and saw ice caked onto the green stem of the flower. Ice? But it was about 50 degrees today!

As Russia stood there confusedly, another gust of cold air blew straight at him like an air cannon, blowing his hair forward with a cold gust. Small flakes of snow caked onto his hair, and it didn't take long for the Russian to realize that an unwelcome guest was there. He scowled annoyed, and grumbled,

"Very funny General. Don't you know that it's spring already? Go bother Antartica, da?"

The season laughed, giggles floating on the wind, _I'm just here to give you a friendly reminder of how Spring just started, and I can stay here for a while. Winter lingers, like it or not._

Before Russia could even protest against any more wind or ice, Winter sent a final gust of icy powder towards Russia's lovely sunflowers. It froze the plants, making them droop, and before the horrified nation could do anything, Winter disappeared, laughing cruelly.

Ivan sighed sadly, brushing snow off the poor flowers, even though he knew that they were goners. He hated General Winter with a passion, tired of being bullied by him. Why was it that the General hated him so much?

Day finally ruined, the violet eyed nation walked back inside, kicked off his boots, and poured himself a nice helping of vodka. If nobody knew better, the vodka could have been easily mistaken for a glass of water.

Settling down in his large comfy chair, in the living room, Russia sipped at his vodka, irked at his misfortune.

About five minutes later, when it seemed peaceful, the doorbell rang. Russia gave an annoyed huff, and got up slowly, lumbering at a half hearted pace to answer the door. If that was Poland coming back to mock him again, he'd feel absolutely delighted to bash that pink pansy's head in.

He turned the knob and opened the door, expecting to find spacey green eyes, but instead, found large worrying blue ones.

_"Sestra?"_

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><p>Ukraine stepped slowly up the walkway, stomach quivering with every step she took. She was ready to start crying, but she knew she couldn't. Not today. She could have turned around and gone back home, but she knew she had to be here now. Not later. This was it. Russia was going to learn the truth today.<p>

As she stepped, she felt soreness in her step, even though she hadn't been walking much all that long. At least she wouldn't be falling over anytime soon. Hopefully.

The chill of anxiety had been a discomfort to her now, giving her metaphorical goosebumps. But as she got closer to Russia's house, it seemed to get colder. Now she really felt uncomfortable. She quickly rang the doorbell, hoping this would just get over with. As she folded her arms tightly, she heard something whisper,

_Ukraine, my little rabbit. Long time, no see? Are you feeling well?_

She looked up to see the tall looming figure of the General Winter. White snowflakes sprinkled around the grass over which he was standing, contrasting against his dark ash gray coat. His eyes were piercing cold and taunting, staring at her.

She glared back, surprisingly vicious, "Please leave me alone Winter. I am not interested in what you have to say."

_I know why you are here. You're finally going to tell him, aren't you, good girl? Don't I deserve to be part of this conversation too?_

"You don't deserve anything, especially since you've hurt poor Russia so much. And especially for what you did to me."

_Says the woman who runs from him regularly._

"It's not my fault! My boss makes me-" she started to argue angrily. Before she could continue however, Winter disappeared, leaving no trace of snow behind him.

Ukraine raised an eyebrow, but fear dropped to her gut as she heard the front door click, and Russia opened the door. His eyes were a dull violet, but widened in surprise as he recognized the face in front of him.

"Sestra?"

Ukraine smiled shakily, "Hello brother, it's been a while."

Russia tilted his head, and smiled a little, saying quietly, "Yes it has. Has your boss allowed you to visit me."

"Yes, I finally got him to cut me a break. But only for so much time..."

"Da, I see." nodded Russia, not noticing the sadness in his sister's eyes, "Would you like to come in?"

Ukraine nodded, smiling nervously. She then stepped inside the house.

"Did you recieve my Christmas present Katyusha?"

"The sunflower painting? Yes I loved it Ivan, spasibo."

Ivan smiled, but noticed his sister was shaking a little, seeming unsteady on her feet. She must have walked all the way from her house, poor thing!

"Would you like a chair Katyusha?"

"Da, I would..." she said quietly, as Ivan invited her to sit on his couch. Her eyes reflected worry. Ivan finally decided to ask, "Is everything all right?"

"I suppose I should tell you why I came here Ivan. I need to tell you something very important."

"Da?"

"I have not told you everything about your past..."

"What do you mean?"

"I think you'd better sit down, Ivan." warned Katyusha, weakly.

_"I have not been telling you the whole truth...And now you need to know..."_

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><p><strong>So next chapter, we'll be seeing a glimpse of Ukraine as a teenager, before Ivan was born, and some other characters. Mother Russia will be appearing, but I need to actually find the appropriate ancient name for her.<strong>

**And as you could tell maybe, something's wrong with Ukraine. And you'll find out later.**

**I don't know when the next chapter will be up.**

**Read and review or Ukraine gets breast enhancement surgery.**

**Translations:**

**Sestra - Sister**

**Spasibo - thank you**


	2. Meeting of Nobody

**Chapter two, where we get to see a glimpse of Ukraine's past. Some historical names, but otherwise little accuracy. EDIT: In the next chapters, Ukraine's name is changed to Kiev, because after some research, that is usually how it was referred to as. Kiev is also Ukraine's capital.**

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><p>Springtime that year had been very cold, as it had been the year before. This was pretty much standard for those who lived on the ancient land. The wildflowers were beginning to bloom with pale watery colors that would mature into vivid shapes. Tall grass grew on the northern plains, and waved in the wind.<p>

During the time of winter, ice would cake onto the grass, leaving any abandoned wheat or crops to die. Thus it was important that the farming communities do their job and bring in the harvest early. Early winter meant hungry people.

Much of what was remembered from this time was the land of Kiev, part of the much larger land of Kievan Rus. This province was proud of its agricultural strengths, it's harvests plentiful when successful.

In the fields' dirt trailed outskirts lay the homes of the various villagers and travelers. Most homes were small and simple, made of wood or stone. Not like the palaces of folklore or rumored ancient kingdoms in Asia. And most of the homesteads did not keep people warm, which was why it was important that they could depend on cloth making skills and fire to prevent themselves from freezing.

One house, simple and small of wood and stone, belonged to a woman known by the townsfolk as Eva Braginskaya, but in the system of a nations' living embodiments, she was Kievan Rus. The normal population of the town never knew or assumed that their land's conditions hung in the life of her. The most they knew of her was that she was a very social and upcoming middle aged woman.

Appearancewise, she was a tall, impressionable woman, with long white-blonde hair roped in a mature braid to her mid-back. Her soft lilac tinted blue eyes were quite skilled with hiding the intimidating power she held. Eva was a very determined lady, who was often persuasive with how she went about with her life, and was often strict, serious, and punctual. But her smile was often sweet enough that it was too easy to coerce someone into letting her have her way. Her clothes were not for royalty, but were far more distinguished from the other attire of the people, thus making her more well known than the norm. She wore a light blue and lavender gown with a worn gray shawl covering her down to the midsection. Her elegance was very striking for such a large representation of land.

"Yetkaterina my dear, do be careful carrying the milk pails, da? We don't want any spilling." warned Kievan Rus gently.

"As always Mother." smiled Katyusha (her preferred name) back, as she plodded along obediently. The girl was an impressively close image to that of her mother, her eyes soft and bright, yet they were blue like the cloudy winter sky, not a hint of violet. She was born in the winter during a horrible blizzard, her mother going through much stress and pain. Her pale blonde hair was chilled by the winter snow permanently, leaving it with a slight silvery tint. Despite the rough circumstances, she was growing up wonderfully. Her hair reached just slightly below her shoulders, and tied in a ribbon, lay in a curled bun on the back of her head. Her face, once chubby and childish was starting to form into something more slender and adult. Her chin was beginning to form more impressively, and her nose had a fine pointed curve, all as if they were sculpted onto her pale, rose tinted skin. She was dressed in a self stitched grayish-beige dress, wearing a shawl near identical to her mother's, keeping her warm from the early spring chill.

She clutched the shawl very close to her bosom, letting it gently press into her chest. Despite how beautiful everyone else found her, she was ashamed of one thing. Her breasts were much larger than normal for a girl at her age. Kievan Rus gently reassured her, "It's just your large tracts of agricultural land. Nothing to be ashamed of, da? You should be lucky, when I was your age, I was flat chested."

It wasn't too much of a comfort to Katyusha though, who was quite used to getting looks from the young men and adolescents of the town. Plus, as her land's colonization grew when puberty hit, it was a pain when her 'womanly assets' introduced themselves, budding very quickly. It was an awkward experience for Kat, who still had the physical appearance of a ten year old girl then. Her face, which had still clung to its baby fat did not really fit the large anatomical features.

The year after that was absolutely horrific for Yetkaterina, who had been so certain that she was terminally ill when she felt gross, and found that she was bleeding from...down there. It was followed by a very embarrassing talk from her mother, which touched upon something called the 'birds and the bees' and something that started with an 'm', mens-something...Katyusha couldn't remember what it was called. But it was very odd all the same. And at the physical appearance and mental age of eleven, Katyusha, Kiev, began to see the world very differently.

She learned that as she got older, people would look at her strangely, some would want to see her more often than she thought normal, and perhaps some would want to look at her without her shawl...or anything at all. Her mother taught her to be aware of this, and to not give into the desires of those who asked for it. There was a particular instance still clear in the young nation's mind, from when she was fifteen, when a foolish drunkard made an open, unclean attempt to touch her brutely on her large chest, and not let go. Her mother saw this, and taking her metal pipe, smacked it soundly into the man's face, knocking him over and out cold. The man smelled like liquor and pigsty which made Katyusha recoil and cringe a little. She was silent for the trip home.

Thus, Kiev found it a pretty simple idea to be careful. The men who smelled terrible and looked old and ugly were not to be approached, and they mustn't approach her. The people who smelled nice and looked good were the ones she seemed she could trust. Eva didn't point them out or anything, like she did with the drunkard. If they looked at her funny, she simply broke eye contact with them, and walked faster. Mama could always deal with them for her.

When the two nations reached their home, Kiev set the milk pails on the small wood table by the fire pit carved into the stone wall. An opening in the roof acted as the vent, and a wood grate, stained by smoke, covered the hole so little snow or rain ever got through. The inside of the home itself was pretty standard for the time. There was the firepit for cooking and heat, a desk and chair made of wood, a few tables, and a box made to store food. A box with an ice block was made by Eva to keep perishable food longer. A carved wood cupboard kept hold of their small supplies of dishes, cups, silverware, and cooking pots. Even a small bottle meant for babies, that was made when Eva was pregnant with Yetkaterina.

The mother and daughter shared a bed for reasons of space in their small house, and for warmth. There was a shed in back with whatever mismatches of tools they had, and a small mound of dirt meant for sunflowers. The cold weather made this rather difficult though.

Kievan Rus took out the large metal pot, and hooking it over the firepit, turned to her daughter Kiev, who sat in a chair, waiting to be told something, "I'll be making beet and onion soup with the milk we bought. It will take a little while, so why don't you go busy yourself, alright?"

"Yes Mama." answered the girl, obediently cheerful.

"Oh, and be sure to-"

"I'll stay in the front of the house mama."

"You don't need to do that, child, I was just going to say to leave your boots outside if you use them. The ground is muddy. But if you are leaving the house, just be careful."

"Oh, okay mama. May I go into the field?"

"My dear, you don't need to ask me, of course you may. Just be aware of your surroundings, as usual."

"Thank you mama." answered Kiev shyly, as she left the house, shutting the door. Kievan Rus sighed. Her daughter was so timid. She was starting to fear that she might be too sheltered for her own good. Ever since the monthly gift of womanhood hit, her daughter was susceptible of being founder of her own nation someday, and if she was this anxious, it could mean disaster.

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><p>Katyusha walked up the road a ways, until she came across to the field which she favored. It was not really a field, more so a patch of grass and dirt with trees sprinkling parts of the edges. It was near barren except for a few orange, strong smelling wildflowers. But it was always so quiet and peaceful. Perfect for reading, knitting, or sewing. Which were things that the girl vowed to be master at. She was already pretty booksmart, but her hands were so clumsy, so it would take a little practice with sewing needles and such.<p>

Walking into the field, to her favorite spot under a fir tree, Katyusha spread her skirt under like a blanket, and sat, pulling out her sewing needle and thread. She then took out a long piece of pale pink cloth from a pocket on her skirt, and pulling the thread through, practiced her stitching. This cloth wasn't going to go to any use, from what she knew, but it was good for practicing with the thin black thread she had.

After a little while, her legs started to get restless, so she sat up, brushing off any bark or dirt clinging to her clothes. She walked around a little, admiring the field's grass tinted orange as the sun set. Wait, the sun was setting? That meant the sky would get dark, and she feared that she'd worry her mother. Really, her mother wasn't that worried for her, she knew that Katyusha was just out in the field. But Katyusha was so convinced her mother was worried about her, she worried about her ownself.

As she started to walk out of the field, she felt a chilly gust of air tickle her legs. Goosebumps pricked her skin from both the cold, and the surprise. The air was getting surprisingly chilly...Thinking it was the evening settling in, Katyusha continued.

About halfway up the road however, she realized her sewing needle was still under the tree with the thread. She had left it there when she stood up to stretch. She may as well go get it, so she wouldn't forget the following day.

As she returned however, she felt that the environment was being shared with someone else. And that the weather had noticeably dropped. Not just chilly-chilly weather, but the kind of weather where snow was to be predicted.

She walked into the field, and was able to see very clearly, that her special spot under the tree was occupied...by a boy, who looked about her age. He was crouched to the ground, holding the sought for needle in two finger, eyeing it curiously.

As Katyusha got closer, she noticed how the boy was wearing grey-brown knit clothing, and a tattered jacket, and how his clothes looked far much too small for him. His pants were too small, Katyusha could see his snow white ankles under them. He looked a little spindly for a boy, thin, and from how he was crouching, a little taller than the norm. His ashen near white hair was unkept and long, dirty and raggled, covering his ears. A strange cap was on his head, it looked like some sort of military hat.

"Oh, you found my needle! Thank you so much!" thanked the girl kindly as she went over. She held her hand out, as if to take it, "I've been looking for it."

The boy turned to meet her, with a blank gaze. His gray eyes were blank and undecisive, not showing anything. Was anything of this boy, not gray? He tilted his head at her and not even starting to give her the needle, opened his mouth, and said very assured,

"You're a nation, aren't you?"

"Hm? What do you mean?" she asked, tilting her head. How did he know she was one? Was he one too?

"You are, I can tell." he then started, lips curling upwards in what seemed to be an attempt to smile. Somehow, it was not a nice smile...it was almost...creepy. His eyes seemed to now have gained a mixture of essence to them, looking very calculating...

"Wh-wha..." started Katyusha, trying to answer the boy. He nodded, eyes seeming to melt now, "I can tell...you're a nation. Kiev right?"

"Y-yes, how did you know?"

"I just do." he simply said, not any cheer or emotion to his answer.

"O-oh, yes. Are you a nation too?"

"No."

Katyusha audibly gulped. The boy was human? Oh dear, humans weren't allowed to know about nation's embodiments...

As if he could tell her worry, the boy said blankly, "Never mind, I don't care if you are or not, it's not like anybody else knows. You're still a girl, so that's what matters."

"Oh-um...alright...just don't tell anyone please...it's not really meant to be-"

"I don't see any reason why others need to know." interrupted the boy. Good word, was he psychic or something?

The boy stared at the needle in his hand again, and asked, "What is your name?"

"Yetkaterina." smiled the girl, "But I prefer to be called Katyusha."

"Katyusha...it sounds nice." nodded the boy blandly, "It makes me think of rabbits...I once named a rabbit Katyusha...but it died."

"Oh dear how awful!"

"...It wasn't too bad...it just froze to death."

At the mention of the word 'froze', Katyusha felt chilled, almost forgetting how cold the air had gotten. She was about ready to ask the boy his name when she heard the gentle voice of her mother calling,

"Yetkaterina! Time for supper!"

She turned her head to cry, "Yes Mother!"

When she turned her head, the boy was gone.

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><p><strong>The mysterious boy is unknown for now. Who is he? And what does he want?<strong>

**Read and Review or Katyusha is going to become like Stephen King's Carrie.**


	3. Lantern from Nobody

"I'm out of sugar,sorry...I have honey if you'd like some, da?..." apologized Russia as he returned into the room with two steaming mugs of tea. He had his sister pause her story as he made the beverage, finding that it would have been polite to do so. Ukraine seemed a little wearier than normal, and he had politely asked her if she would like to take a break from speaking, and have some tea to warm her up.

"I'm fine Ivan, just tea is alright."

The idea of Ivan asking her to have tea comforted Katyusha a little. It was in the past that they would share tea together, and chat calmly and with no qualms. Maybe if she thought of this in that way, it would be easier to get over with.

Ukraine smiled shakily once again, as her brother handed her the cup of tea. As she took the first sip, her dry throat which had been sharply paining her relaxed under the theraputic heat of the warm tea and its herbs. But the sensation was different to it all the same, and it made her choke a little.

Ivan's eyes shot up a little, worried slightly as his sister coughed on the tea, "Sestra, are you alright?"

He was now very concerned about his sister, how she had been choking on the tea. From what he knew, that had never happened before. Was she sick? The last time Katyusha was sick, it was in the 1980's, after the Chernobyl incident, and things had gotten progressively worse because of the radiation symptoms. It was only when she had agreed to take chemotherapy that she had gotten better. Ivan felt incredibly guilty for what had happened, and had to hold back tears everytime he saw his sister with circles under her eyes, and fevered. He couldn't even bring himself to leave his house once her hair started falling out. She still forgave him, even though to this day, Chernobyl was a dangerous place. She constantly told him it was an accident, and it wasn't his fault, but he still felt the guilt pulling at him. He could never get rid of the thought that he might have been hurting her.

Katyusha's breaths became normal, and as she paused a moment, cheeks red from breathlessness and embarrassment, "D-da, I'm fine Ivan...now shall I continue?"

"Oh, da! Now you were telling me about some boy...what was his name?", asked Ivan.

"I have yet to tell you...I'll get to that soon enough..."

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><p>The following week, Katyusha was out with her mother during the morning. They had to shop at the market for some grain and fabric, and then clean the house. Since it was spring, that meant the old dirt and grime of winter would need to be wiped clean from the slate, leaving the home fresh and new for the year.<p>

The market of the town was rather small, compared to other rich markets of the world. There was livestock and crops, but it was scarce. Occassionally, foreign merchants would come in, with very different goods that were native to their home. The different goods of different people were either spread out on blankets, draped under tents, or in the merchant's homes, where they would sell it via their doors and windows.

Kievan Rus carried a woven basket to put their purchases in, and immediately eyed a merchant selling fabric on a fur-pelt tarp. She smiled softly to Kiev who was trailing behind like a cautious duckling, "Yetkaterina, could you go scout for anyone selling sacks of grain, and come tell me please?"

"Da, mama." replied the girl, as her mother turned her attention back to the booth, where she would find a uniqueness in the pale pink cloth folded in the corner. It was soft, and good material to use for keeping warm...

Katyusha plodded down the busy road, gazing nonchalantly at the goods lined along the roads or the edge of the field. A few merchants had laid out on their woolen blankets pounds of dried corn from last harvest, and heads of cabbage were split in half for sale. One man, hair graying, had barrels of fermented drink next to him, a money pouch in hand, and poorly made cups to hold the alcohol. He must have been trying to make a quick penny with it, but it wouldn't really work. This was a market, not a fair.

At least that's what Katyusha thought, until she saw something very unusual, sitting between two basket merchants. It was something she had never seen before at a market like this. It looked like a giant red-painted box on wheels. But its roof was sticking out from the top and hanging over, like an awning. The roof was a dark painted color, and looked like it was layered piece by piece with round tiles. Almost like that odd Chinese plant her mother told her about. The box, as said before, was red, but painted around the edges, was an amazing gold color.

When Katyusha went to get a closer look, she saw the other edge of it, and realized that it was a wagon, for travelers. Her mother had shown her a drawing of one once. Hanging on the unique roof were soft colored orbs glowing with a light. They were hooked on little metal rods, dangling elegantly. On the wall of the wagon, were foreign characters that read out as something the girl could not even understand, written on a wooden sign nailed to the wagon.

An unseen door from the back of the wagon opened, then closed, and from behind the foreign vehicle, appeared a boy. Well, he almost looked like a girl, but Katyusha could tell quick enough. His clothes were very unique and decorated compared to hers, bright red and yellow, silky. His hair was a dark raven, but shined with darker brown highlights, smooth, and in a ponytail by the nape of his neck. His golden eyes showed friendliness as he noticed Katyusha looking at the baubles hanging from the roof.

"Those are lanterns. Very pretty at night, aru.", he informed lightly.

"Oh I see...I was wondering what they were. I've never seen them before." replied the girl, taking a closer look at them, wondering how they worked.

"They like oil lamps or candles, but nicer, aru. They make good decorations."

Katyusha took note of his accent...it was very different from hers. He was definitely not from around here...at this point, he seemed a lot stranger than the boy she met a week ago.

"Plus, even though they made of paper, they not burn. They very sturdy, aru."

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><p>"He said aru? Like China? Was it China?"<p>

"Ivan, don't interrupt. I'm getting there."

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><p>The nation's blue eyes glowed in the soft light of the lanterns, each about as big as a little squash, so it would fit in two hands. The color of them made her smile, as they reminded her of their lack in her everyday life. Her home was simple, and very muted in rich vibrant colors. When in the fields, the flowers were what made the land seem more kindly.<p>

"Would you like one, aru?"

Katyusha stuttered, "I...I don't think I have enough...", as she patted her shawl, looking for her bag of currency.

The boy smiled at her, "It alright. I can give you one."

"Oh, you really don't need to do that...I'll just-"

"Nonsense. These easy to make, aru. Very cheap to sell, they so popular in my home. Pretty northern girl shouldn't be caught without one, aru."

Katyusha blushed slightly, and, then asked, "Where do you live?"

"I live in China...right now, I live with my ah...uncle...he in charge of this wagon and everything. I make lanterns though, aru. Now, which color would you like?"

Katyusha looked up at the multicolor plethora of glowing bubble shaped decorations, and finally decided, "Could I have a bright red one please?"

"Certainly, aru. Let me go in wagon to get one." and the boy disappeared into the side door.

Katyusha looked up at the decorations on the roof, waiting for the Chinese boy to return. However, she caught glimpse of something familiar standing on the opposite corner of the wagon. It was the boy from the last week, staring up at the lanterns with blank, unexpressive eyes. He was still in his too-small clothes, and his hair was still dirty and untamed. Yetkaterina swore she could have seen his eyes fix on her for a split second before going back to the lanterns. She opened her mouth, and let out a faint, almost unsure, "Hello!..."

The boy took another slow glance at her, and without another reaction, averted his gaze to the Chinese lights once again. He didn't seem particularly interested in them, he just seemed to be staring into some spacial void in front of them. And that uncomfortable feeling of chilliness seemed to be in the air once again.

She decided to make more conversation, "...Y-you forgot to tell me your name last week..."

The boy looked at her again, and giving a slow nod, responded blankly, "So I did."

There was a pregnant pause as Yetkaterina waited for the boy to say anything else. But he made no further action. The silence was ended by the Chinese boy returning with a happy smile, "Here we are. One red lantern, aru!"

As he handed Katyusha the lantern tied on a wooden stick, his eyes set on the tall, steeple built boy standing by the wagon, who was staring at him, dead cold. Gray met gold, for just a moment, and the red-dressed boy couldn't help but feel a little nervous.

"Can I help you, aru?" he decided to ask, not trying to look rude if the other boy was looking to buy. But he recieved nothing, as the pale haired tramp-dressed boy simply walked off, out of sight.

The golden-eyed boy finally said with a humored and relaxed smile, "Aiyah, that boy creepy! You know him, aru?" he asked Katyusha.

"Somewhat. I met him last week, and I still don't know his name."

"Well pretty girl better watch out, aru! Speaking of name, what is yours?"

"Oh, mine is Yetkaterina, but I prefer Katyusha." smiled the girl.

"Katyusha, very pretty name, aru. Mine is Yao."

"Nice to meet you Yao, and thank you very much for the lantern!"

"Yetkaterina~!" called a soft voice. Katyusha turned her head, to see her mother walking over, basket in hand. A folded heap of pink fabric lay in it. Eva then asked, "Did you find any grain?"

"Oh, hello Mama...I um..."

"_Kievan Rus_?" asked Yao suddenly, making Katyusha gasp, "Y-you_ know_ her...?"

Eva smiled and said, "Well hello China! It's nice to see you again. It seems you've met my daughter, Kiev!"

"She very pretty, aru!"

Kiev turned back to her mother, "He's a nation too?"

"Da. I met him and his family not too long ago. Has everything been well for you China?"

"Oh, everything good. Little Yong Soo grow bigger, aru. He my baby brother, remember?"

"Oh the baby is? How wonderful, da? Well, you take care alright?" smiled the large nation, as she then turned to look at her daughter, "Never mind about the grain. It can wait. I'm going back home, but if you want to stay and talk to Yao a little, then you may. Just don't be out too long, da?"

"Oh, thank you Mama..." murmured Katyusha politely. As her mother went off, Kiev brushed a loose lock of her hair behind her ear, and turned back to China, who was watching Ukraine's mother walk off. He then smiled cheekily and asked, "So your country name Kiev?"

"Yes. But I like my human name better. So you're China? That means you've been around for a while..."

"I'm almost thousand years old.", he smiled wisely, proud of his longevity.

"A thousand? But you look so you-" she started excitedly, but then stopped, thinking it would be rude to comment on his age. The look on her face must have been funny, as it made him laugh. He then shrugged, and said, "Better young looking than looking like girl! You not know how many times I be called a 'young lady', aru!"

Katyusha bit her lip, trying not to smile too much. She could see why. With his silky, elegant clothes, and long hair, plus that round face, it was rather difficult to decipher that he actually_ was_ a man.

When the sound of the door clicking on the wagon was heard, Yao's smile was wiped instantly, and he tilted her head, blue eyes showing confusion. He whispered a curse in Mandarin under his breath.

"Aiya...here come Mongolia." he whined, as a large figure turned the corner. The man had almond shaped eyes, gold in color, but unlike Yao's, were piercing, like a hawk's. His eyebrows were like thick ink strokes, and his hair was in a ponytail, like China's. He also had a mustache that hung from each side of his nose, like large thick whiskers of a cat. His brown and black clothes were flowing and elegant, but very bold and supported his intimidating stand.

His hawk-gaze fixed on the lantern in Katyusha's hands, then to Yao. He said in a deep, demanding voice, "Do you have the money for that lantern you sold?"

Yao trembled slightly, "Uncle...I...I gave it to her as gift. She my friend, aru...right Katyusha?"

"Oh, ah...yes..." she agreed.

Mongolia glared slightly at the Chinese boy, "What did I tell you about _my_ merchandise boy? How will we make anything from these if you continue to mindlessly give them away?"

"Sir, I can pay for it, let me just run home to get my-" started Katyusha worriedly, but she was stopped by Mongolia's unchanged tone,

"That isn't necessary my dear. This boy just needs to be taught a lesson."

"B-but he-"

"Go home, and be a good little girl. The next time your friend meets you, he won't be as foolish. _Enjoy your lantern_." he then dismissed, taking Yao firmly by the shoulder, and before the boy could cry in protest, he was whisked into the wagon, out of sight.

Katyusha felt a sinking rock of dread in her stomach as she heard the door close to the wagon. She couldn't imagine what might happen in there. Mongolia just made her want to shudder, especially how he had said Yao would need to be _taught a lesson_. It wasn't like when Mama told her the same thing. Mama said she would 'teach her a lesson' if she needed to learn how to sew, cook, or take care of young children. When Mongolia said it, it sounded more like he was going to do something awful to Yao. Like beat him. Those fists of his looked calloused and tough...

* * *

><p>She gave a sigh, and chest still heavy with dread, she walked away from the decorated wagon, and bobbed her lantern gently on the wooden stick. It was unlit, as there was no candle in it, but it was still beautiful. How did the candle stay in there anyway. Oh well, Katyusha thought. She could figure it out later.<p>

As she walked up the dirt road, heading for home, she passed the field. It looked very still, and nothing seemed to be happening. And yet, some sort of inner urge seemed to be pulling Katyusha to walk into the field, and by her favorite tree.

When she turned to face it, who else should be there, but the mysterious unnamed boy, laying on his side, facing away from Katyusha. He looked very still, not even moving.

Katyusha slowly went over to him, and as she got closer, could feel a slight drop in temperature as she neared him. She knelt down, his back facing her, and she hovered her palm close to the back of his neck, which was hidden by his near gray white mess of hair. Her palm prickled at the cold air surfacing near it, and Katyusha couldn't help but think that something was definitely against reality with this boy.

She then mindlessly let two of her fingers weave a loose strand of his ragged hair. He jerked slightly, giving a gasp, and sitting up, stared to face Katyusha, his gray eyes, for once, reflecting surprise. The little pools of shock then seemed to melt, fading into the dull irises. He stared blankly at her once again, and sighed,

"Can't I even nap without disruption?"

Katyusha glared, and finally said with a little determination, "I want to know your name."

He blinked at her mechanically, and without anything coming from his mouth, he lay back down and closed his eyes. He was facing Katyusha this time, leaving her to give a look of annoyance. She gave an irritated huff, and she said with almost a whine, "Well, I want to know it! Tell me!"

The boy curled up a little, then stretched, like a cat in the sun. He relaxed, and did nothing else.

Katyusha bit her lip angrily, and whined, "Tell me your name, or I won't let you nap!"

"How? You'll bounce your breasts?"

Katyusha's eyes widened, and blushing red like a tomato, she stood up, and kicked him in the legs. His eyes opened, and he gave a cry of pain, "Ow!"

"Y-you little imp, you! Tell me it already! What is your name? I told you mine, so that means you have to tell me yours!"

He looked up at her, and giving a slow, icy smile, giggled under his breath, "I don't have to tell you anything."

Katyusha glared once more, boiling frustration, and grumbled, "You know what? Fine! Don't tell me your name, Mister Boring!"

"Aha."

"Aha, what?"

"You got my name."

"I what?"

"My name."

"Your name is Mister Boring?"

"Well according to you it is."

"Then it's not your real name." she sighed, annoyed with his game.

"I go by many names, _krolik zayets zaychek_. Any of them can be real. That is just one you gave me."

"You don't have a name?"

"Not really. I do have one, but for reasons I'd prefer not to disclose, I'll keep it to myself, thank you."

As he rolled over, facing away from her, shutting his eyes, Katyusha thought a moment. She then asked softly, "Well is there anything you _like_ to be called?"

There was a long silence as his breaths were rhythmic, and she waited. When it seemed he wasn't going to answer, he finally stated blandly,

"_My name is Savva._"

* * *

><p><strong>So here we are at the end of chapter three. And as you can tell, our dear friend China has appeared. And for those wondering, YES he will come back, but in a later chapter. He's got an important role, you'll see.<strong>

**And I was kind enough to finally reveal the strange boy's name. Savva is a Russian name, meaning 'old man' or just 'old'. I picked it for a good reason, that and it sounds cool.**

**I _would_ make a translation for krolik zayets zaychek, but I'm going to leave it to my readers to figure out its meaning. **

**Updates will be weekly, if I'm lucky to get computer time. If not, you'll have to sit tight.**

**And if you guys didn't see my chapter 1 update, there will be the Canada/Ukraine pairing placed in here, but it's not important to the story. I might add Amerussia too...**

**Read and review or Mongolia's name becomes Shan Yu, and this story becomes a _horrible_ knockoff of Mulan (which BTW is an awesome movie).**


	4. Friendship with Nobody

**Next part!**

* * *

><p>"So...what happened to China?" asked Ivan curiously as he took another sip of tea.<p>

"I was never quite sure as to what happened, but I best assume that Mongolia beat him...you know in the past that he was rather...brutal."

"D-da..." cringed Ivan, remembering the hell the Asian nation put him through during the time of the Golden Horde. That was his earliest childhood memory, the rest having been slowly disappearing. He felt sorry for Yao, knowing the ancient nation had to deal with the savage Mongolia for nearly thousands of years.

Katyusha sighed and sipped her tea, before setting the cup down, "Shall I continue?"

Her brother tilted his head, "Sestra, whatever this is about, can't you just tell me _what_ it is?"

"I need to tell the whole story. Or you won't understand."

Ivan massaged the bridge of his nose with his hand and sighed a little wearily, "Da."

Katyusha pressed her lips together, and taking a deep breath, smiled and nodded, and said shakily, "Now where was I?"

"You just told me the boy's name was Savva. Who was he?"

"You'll know soon enough."

* * *

><p>Katyusha got up early the next morning, and put on her blue shawl and dress. Her mother always got up earlier than her it seemed, but as Katyusha was lacing her dress up, Eva was groggy and still in her nightclothes. Her silver-white hair lay messily down her back, face weary. She raised an eyebrow at her daughter, who was already clean and dressed, and making porridge in a pot.<p>

She smiled sleepily, "Well it looks like someone woke up early today, da?"

"Good morning, Mama. I decided to wake up a little earlier today."

"Earlier than me. Any reason?"

Katyusha shrugged, "I just wanted a better start on the day."

Her mother shook her head slightly, "You should be more energetic like this on market mornings."

"I won't promise it mama..." replied Katyusha as she poured the porridge in two bowls. She handed one to her mother who set it down on the table, explaining, "I'm still groggy, I'll eat it when I get clean and dressed."

She then tilted her head in thought as her daughter ate her bowl of porridge steadily. She then said with an earnest, wisened smile, "Now why don't you tell me the _real_ reason you got up so early. You haven't been losing sleep have you?"

"No mama. I'm just...ah...going to go see a friend."

"Oh, really now? Someone I've met?"

"No. Just a boy I met in the field a few weeks ago."

"Oh, a _gentleman_ friend?" her mother smiled knowingly, leaving her daughter to blush beet red.

"N-nyet mama! Just a friend! Or more like someone I'm getting to know..."

"Oh, I see...what is this boy's name?"

"Savva."

"Savva...interesting. A very peculiar name, da?"

"Da. He's kind of weird too, he doesn't say much."

"Oh, a shy one?"

Katyusha cracked a small smile, "I guess you could say that."

Her mother smiled, then her face turned slightly serious, "Just remember that if any harm comes to you from this young man, he will face _dire_ consequences."

Intimidated by her mother's sudden power, Kiev shuddered a little and nodded. "Well, I think he could be waiting for me, so I guess I'll um...go?"

"Da. Good luck with your friend!" her mother smiled teasingly.

As Kiev trotted out the door, Kievan Rus sighed a little, smiling as she remembered her own childhood. '_Teenagers..._'

* * *

><p>Savva had not moved from his spot under the tree when Katyusha returned that morning. He glanced up at her, and blinked. He looked back down, closing his eyes, as if to sleep. Katyusha tilted her head, and then asked,<p>

"Did you sleep under there?"

"Maybe."

"Don't you have a home?"

"This is my home."

"...Are you homeless?"

Savva looked up at her, gray eyes inquiring, "A home's definition to me does not match yours."

"...So you are...do you live out here all the time...do you have any family?"

"Not always. If I find some money, some people are nice to me, and let me stay in their home for a while. But then they kick me out."

"Why do they kick you out?"

He gave a small cheshire grin, showing canine-sharp teeth, "Because I apparently overwelcome my stay. My family's been gone for years."

Kiev, at that moment, felt very sorry for Savva. Even though his smile didn't show it, she couldn't help but think how lonely it must be to have no family, and be alone all this time. She had been used to being with Kievan Rus her whole life, and couldn't imagine what life would be like without her. What was the boy's life like? Was he lonely? Was he ever cold or hungry?

He gave a passive gesture with his hand, "It's not that bad though. I'm still alive, and to be frank, I _love_ the cold."

His freeze-ice stare punctuated his words, making Katyusha shudder, as she clutched her shawl. Good day, why was he so eerie? Was nothing about him normal?

The girl then noticed how the boy's clothes hung from his body, much too big. He looked so...lanky. She tilted her head, pale curls draping a little by her shoulder. She thought of how skinny his body must be under his thick, shagged, soldier's coat, and how he seemed to have no permanent home. If he had been living out on his own like this for the last few weeks she had seen him, he must have found some food somehow or none at all.

"Are you hungry?", she asked curiously. He peered up again, and replied, "Where did that come from, krolik zayets zaychek?"

"What does that mean again?" she asked, confused by the term.

"Bunny."

"Why did you call me bunny?"

"Because it suits you. Now why do you ask if I'm hungry?"

"Well, ever since I've seen you, you've been living out here. Do you go anywhere else to get food?"

"No. I don't have money."

"Well, have you even eaten?"

"I'll live."

"I didn't ask that, I asked if you've eaten." she started, nose crinkling.

"No, _mother_, I've not eaten for a while."

She frowned, and then said, "Well, do you _want_ something to eat?"

"I'm fine. I really don't need-"

"You're going to starve without food, Savva. You're so skinny, your clothes are going to fall off!"

He clicked his tongue, "No they're not, they're too small."

"Not that hulking coat! Not even my mother could wear it without making a tuck in the cloth. Now stay here."

"Where are you going?"

"I'm getting you food. And you're going to eat it. I've got some porridge at home, so I can get a bowl of it for-"

Savva's pale face showed grimace, "I hate porridge. It's too warm and slimy."

Katyusha frowned, blue eyes firm, "Alright, then what will you eat?"

He looked down in thought a moment, and staring back up with a stone face, licked his lips slightly, "Meat. I like meat."

"Oh, um...alright..." thought Katyusha. She didn't expect that he'd want something so rich, but then again, he was a growing adolescent, and meat was good for boys. There was some elk meat that her mother had hunted in their icebox, so that might have been good for him.

"I like meat, and I can hunt for it sometimes. I'm good at hunting." he droned, emotionless.

"I have some elk meat at home in my icebox."

"Good. Elk meat is the best." he nodded, pulling at a stray strand on his coat.

"It's in my icebox, so I might have to cook it over a fire for y-"

"No need to. It's fine as it is."

"But it's frozen."

"I can manage. Just bring it to me."

Katyusha sighed, and turning back for home, wondered what kind of boy this was. Even now, he was even stranger.

When she got home, Eva was not there. She must have been out of the house now. So, home alone, Katyusha took one of the knives on their metal-wares table, and opening the icebox, grabbed the large red slab of elk in one hand. It was frozen and slimy in her hand, slipping slightly with a greased feel. She sawed the knife through the meat, cutting off a good sized piece of it for Savva. It wasn't large enough to nourish him for life, but it would fill his belly for the day at least.

Wrapping the meat in a cloth to keep it clean, Katyusha ran back to the field, under the tree. Savva was still sitting there, looking bored. Didn't ever do anything but stare out in front of him?

Katyusha looked around, asking, "Are you going to make a fire or something?"

Taking the meat from her hands, he said, "No, why?"

And without any hesitation, he unsheathed the cloth, and sank his teeth into the raw frozen elk. Katyusha jumped a little, and squealed, "Savva!"

"What, did you want some?" he asked, chewing the cold raw meat. She shook her head in disgust.

"You're supposed to cook it! Why are you eating it _raw_?"

"Because I like it this way."

"But it's_ frozen_!"

He licked his lips, smiling smugly, "Perfection."

_That is digusting!_, thought Katyusha as she watched him feed on the animal flesh without a single qualm. It made her stomach churn, and so, she looked away. She turned back slightly when she heard him hum slightly. He licked his fingers a little, and barely smiling frozenly he said, "Thanks for that."

She shook a little, "W-why do you eat raw meat?"

"When you live out alone like I do bunny, you'll learn how desperate life can get. When you get hungry, desperate times call for desperate measures. Eventually you'll learn how to tolerate, and eventually love foods or preparations that aren't considered impressing."

Savva then flicked a piece of dirt hanging on his shoe, "And sooner or later, it just becomes standard."

Katyusha sighed, and kneeling down by his side, wondered how she found herself coming back to this paranormal boy she called her friend.

Because friends were the ones you gave raw meat to, right?

* * *

><p>"So how much do you actually remember from your childhood Savva?"<p>

"Enough." he replied, as they walked along, dragging a stick in the dirt. His breath still reeked of the raw meat Katyusha gave him that afternoon. This had been the fifth time this month she had given him some of her food. Kiev was still slightly disturbed at his eating habits, but she didn't seem to mind as much anymore. She'd bring him food, and they'd walk along the road aimlessly, chatting idly. Katyusha thought that even if his tone of voice was like that of a rock-creature, his language and words were interesting enough to listen to. He was good conversation, and even if he seemed a little passive with her questions and replies, he at least bothered to listen to them.

"Do you remember anything important?"

"Important. Bunny, my past is not ever important. Remember that."

"Well I'm just a little curious. What happened to your family? If you don't mind, can you tell me?"

Drawing in the dirt with the stick, Savva simply said, "Yes. They are all gone."

Katyusha watched him draw shapes in the dirt, not expecting to hear him then say, "They are all dead."

The girl, blue eyes wide with shock, covered her mouth, "Oh...I'm so-..."

"It was unavoidable for them. Death came naturally."

He then trailed the stick, making a snowflake shape, "I was young when I left them. We were traveling. We were walking across an ice covered lake. The ice cracked under me, and I fell in."

Katyusha shivered as she felt the temperature drop. Savva tilted the stick, making some strange grooves in the soft late spring dirt.

"I cried for my mother, and my little brother Mishka to help me." he started, gray eyes starting to form into something strange.

"But my father told them _'Let him go. The ice will have a better use for him.'_"

The girl shuddered as she heard her friend utter these words with a slight tone on venom to them. It was clear he felt a deep hatred for it, as shown in the ice fiercely growing in his eyes.

"Mishka and mother cried for me as I sank under. I soon lost air, and blacked out. When I woke up, I was cold. So cold. But..."

Katyusha looked up to see him smiling with a strange disturbed peace, "...I didn't mind it."

"My blood is water, like ice now. The cold is what keeps me alive. I've lived past my family members. Even Mishka. He's dead too."

"Y-your little brother? Was he sick?"

"Not at all. He died a wrinkled old man."

Katyusha's mind went blank with all the information Savva gave her. She then asked, choked, "How old are you?"

"Very old." he stated.

"But you look so young."

"I know. My years have barely affected my growth. The ice has slowed me."

"B-but you're not a nation."

"Of course not."

Katyusha then asked bewildered, "Then how have you lived so long? Are you human?"

He stopped, fiddling with the stick, and smiling blankly with a breath, said, "No, I am not human. My name Savva has a meaning. It means I am old. But I am still so young, bunny. The winter cold has given me gifts not for a human."

"Are you a spirit?" she then asked, mystified.

Drawing in the dirt, leaving wind-like swirls, he smiled frozenly once again, "You could say that."

* * *

><p>"I-I..."<p>

Savva stuttered with the words slightly, as he blinked, eyes blank, but a slight color to his paper-toned body.

"I have these for you..." he started, sounding incredibly embarrassed as he held out a couple of frozen flowers. Katyusha, cheeks pink, was giggling slightly. Savva was so cute when he was embarrassed, and not a stone wall. After a month, she had gotten used to the idea that her friend was not a human, and was some supernatural being. Since he wouldn't tell her what he exactly was, she settled with the idea that he was some sort of snow angel. He seemed like it.

As she took the flowers, she asked smiling, "So why are you giving me these?"

He stared blank, blush starting to peter out, "I...I've heard that it is what women appreciate."

"Well, I appreciate them. As soon as the ice comes off them, they'll go in my house."

He scowled slightly, "They're better frozen. They're called sunflowers. Blech."

"What's wrong with...oh." she remembered his animosity towards the summer fauna.

"...Katyusha, what's courtship?"

"Hm?"

"What's courtship?"

Katyusha thought a minute, "Well...from what my mama has told me, it's when a man and a woman love each other, and they want to be closer...like getting married."

"I don't want to get married." he stated.

"Well, you don't have to do that to court someone. But it could happen."

"...Do you love me?"

"What?"

"Do you love me?"

Katyusha bit her lip, heart racing a little. Savva was asking her this? Why now? She was already starting to feel odd around him. Did that mean she liked him? She swayed a little, thinking.

Oh good grief, thought Savva. They were hundreds of years old, not children. It should have been a faster decision. He needed her to know, now.

Before Katyusha could say anything, the gray eyed boy put his lips to hers. She jolted in surprise, brain shutting off momentarily.

And soon enough, she felt herself pressing back, feeling the chill of his lips on hers, but a rather odd musked warmth to them. He tasted like the raw meat he had eaten (disgusting), but there was a sweetness to it, almost natural. She didn't mind it.

When he pulled back, letting them both catch air, his cheeks colored, he stated,

"May we partake in this courtship?"

"...Alright."

* * *

><p><strong>Haha, Savva and his old fashioned ways. So now you know that he's definitely not human. It's kind of obvious who he is, but don't say anything yet. If you do wanna shoot guesses, send me a PM.<strong>

**And I know a lot of you wanna see Kievan Rus. She'll be in the next chapter more.**

**Read and Review or Savva hungers for human flesh.**


	5. Courtship with Nobody

**Next chapter!**

* * *

><p>Russia's eyebrows furrowed in thought, "So...who was he? Or what was he?"<p>

Ukraine pulled back a stray strand of hair in her face, and looked out the living room window.

"At the time...he was rather harmless."

"Harmless? What do you mean by harmless? He didn't hurt you did he?" asked Russia, purple eyes worrying.

Ukraine smiled reassuringly, "No Ivan. He did not hurt me. When I knew him, he did not ever attempt to harm me. In fact, he kept me safe it seemed."

"Well what _was_ he?"

"He was neither human nor god. He was in some terms, a spirit. He was neither good nor bad. It was when I was with him that his good side was there. But even through all that good..."

She looked up, her eerie solemn blue eyes meeting her curious brother's violets.

_"I should have listened to my mother..._"

* * *

><p>Savva didn't say a single word as Katyusha took the wet cloth, and cleaned his dirtied face. At least she was considerate enough to use cold water instead of lukewarm. The cold was much better. Still, he found this unnecessary. He sighed as she moved the cloth lower to wash his neck.<p>

"Yetkaterina, please, this is really superficial..."

She smiled, and shaking her head, replied, "You're so filthy right now, it's unbelievable. When was the last time you took a bath?"

She sniffed his coat, and cringed, "...or took off these clothes?"

He raised an eyebrow, "Where would I bathe myself? The river? And these are my only clothes."

Katyusha thought a moment, and quickly decided, "If you give me your clothes, we can go to my home, and I'll use the washtub to clean them. I have dressing gowns at home that you can put on while we wait for them to dry. And then maybe in that time, you can take a bath. And yes, in the river."

Savva folded his arms and pouted, "I refuse to wear a dressing gown."

Katyusha nodded, then taking him by the hand to help him up, said, "Alright then. We'll just take your clothes, and I'll let you bathe yourself in the river. And since you won't wear a dressing gown, you'll just sit in the river butt-naked until I get your clothes dry at home. So for about...five hours. Pray nobody will see you. Which sounds better?"

He sighed with annoyance, "If it has lace on it, I'm stripping clean."

When they reached her home, Katyusha didn't hesitate to reach into the box of clothing she and her mother had in the corner. Pulling out a white plain dressing gown, she handed it to Savva, who sat boredly on a chair. He stared at her, and then said, "So should I take my clothes off?"

"Oh, right...shall I wait outside?" she asked, cheeks pink. He nodded, and she exited her house, leaving him to change.

When he exited, a few minutes later, he grumbled as he stared at his new attire, "I look even girlier than you."

Kiev giggled, because sadly, it was true. His hair was scraggly, but it was longer than normal, like a woman's. And his spindly body let the snow-white gown make up his build, leaving him to look even more like a woman.

She sighed, kissing his cheek, "Don't be too irked. It's only for a few hours."

He handed her his old clothes in a messy heap. She lay them by the washtub in front of the house, and taking Savva by the hand, led him to the river. It was a pretty short walk, about ten minutes. The whole time, it was silent, as Katyusha's face was red with emotion for her lover, while Savva's was colored with embarrassment.

When they reached the river, Katyusha finally said she'd return later, once she had his clothes cleaned. Once she left, he sat in the river, undressed. He sank down, allowing the water to flow through his stiff scraggled hair, and when he sighed, letting bubbles flow through his nose, little pieces of ice slowly floated in the water, unnoticed.

He let the corners of his mouth turn upward, in an attempted smile, as he washed himself slowly. He felt a strange satisfaction in his chest, following everything Katyusha had done for him. But he couldn't let those weak human emotions grip onto him too much. He didn't want to become vulnerable. Savva was just beginning to realize what he could do, and what he could become. He wasn't going to throw it all away.

When he heard the rocks on the dirt road clatter, he knew that his lover was returning. In a snap decision, he decided to be devious, and pull a trick on her. Following all these months with Katyusha, he knew she was a fun and easy scare.

Katyusha walked back to the river, once she had the clothes hung up to dry on a wire. She thought it best to keep Savva company and see if he was done cleaning himself.

When she got back to the riverbank, the discarded dressing gown still lay in a heap, but where was Savva? He wasn't sitting in the river from where she could see. She grew a little concerned now. Did he climb out, or did the river carry him off? It couldn't have carried him off, could it? It wasn't that rough a current. But then again, did she ever ask him if he knew how to swim?

She peered over the edge of the riverbank, but saw nothing. Except her reflection, which reported back her worried look. She stared at her wobbly reflection, trying to keep herself calm.

"Savva?" she called out, slightly worried. There was no answer.

Her chest began to constrict with nervousness, as she called out, "Savva, are you out here?"

After an even longer silence, she sighed, and got up to walk down the riverbank. But as she rose, an unseen force shot out of the water, and before Katyusha knew anything, she was dragged into the river, with a high scream, and a splash.

Shocked by the cold water, she dove up, gasping for air, and in shock of cold. She whipped around to see Savva staring at her blankly, hair in his face.

She glared at him, "Y-You...You got me wet!"

"Why yes I did.", he replied, with a nod, blandly.

She glared even more, "You nearly drowned me!"

"Oh don't be so dramatic, bunny. It's not like I was holding you under or anything. Besides, isn't this something you normally find humorous?"

"Well, yes, but...no...I mean...well not when it's happening to me!"

He smirked, "Figures."

Without another word, he snaked his arms around her waist. They were colder than the water itself, but having known him for so long, Katyusha didn't mind too much. She sighed as she leaned into him, finally winding down from the shock he gave her.

Savva hummed a little as he took one of his ice-carved hands and stroked her drenched blonde hair with his fingers. Her hair had come undone, and lay like a drenched mass over her shoulders. But nobody really minded.

As he pet her hair, she peered up, "So what are you doing?"

"...I'm just thinking." he muttered back monotonously.

"About what?" she asked, her clothes bobbing in different directions, from the current.

"Nothing important right now."

"Oh." she replied, smiling softly. That was Savva. He was always thinking of things that didn't concern her, it seemed.

So they both were embraced together in the river, Katyusha's clothes absolutely drenched (her mother barely believed that she simply fell in the river that night), and Savva naked and skin colder than an iceberg.

And neither were mindful of the water which waded around them.

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><p>In the months that followed, their relationship became closer. Katyusha realized <em>how<em> much she wanted Savva, not just that she wanted him. Soon enough, their time together grew more intimate. Nothing ever became too serious that undergarments were removed, or virginities taken, but it was definitely closer.

The feverishly cold kisses that Savva applied to Katyusha's neck always resulted in both of them panting and gasping as they became more passionate and needful. Katyusha just hoped that Savva enjoyed it as much as she did. He stated that he was _tolerant_ to everything. His attitude towards intimacy seemed to be that as long as Katyusha enjoyed it, he didn't mind. She had called his bluff and said, "Oh quit beating around the bush, you're just as horny as me."

It was one evening the following spring, that Savva seemed more tired than normal. Not that he was an energetic person in the first place, but he seemed very different to Katyusha, who was observant of his strange behavior.

"Savva, are you alright?"

"Bunny, I think it's nearing time for me to go."

Her eyes widened, "W-what are you talking about?"

"The summer will be coming soon. I don't really want to stay around for that time. I can't really, anyway...it wouldn't be healthy for me..."

"But you were fine last summer!"

"Yes, because it was a colder year. But look now, it's getting much warmer than it ever has. And as you know, I don't do well in summer heat."

"W-well where would you go?"

"Perhaps up farther north, where the cold is better."

"B-but then I can't see you!"

He sighed, "The bittersweetness of it, no? You wouldn't have to worry too much, bunny. Under the circumstances of my identity, I'd be returning sooner than you think."

"B-but...I just don't want you to leave..."

He smirked minimally, "Don't fret. I'm not leaving just yet."

Katyusha sighed, and snuggled closer, as they sat together behind her home. They had been here every single night for the past month, enjoying the pleasantly cool weather. As she closed her eyes however, she felt a sense of nervousness as she heard the tender voice calling, "Yetkaterina?" was audible. Before she could say anything to Savva who was indifferent, or get up to leave, she was looking up at the face of her mother.

Kievan Rus still had not met Savva, after all this time. Kiev had either tried to introduce them but one was not present to meet the other, or she was too nervous to. It was nervous for any teenager to introduce their suitor to a parent.

Eva stared at the scene in front of her, and tilting her head, asked in pure curiosity, "Yetkaterina, who is this?"

Mouth running silently, on meltdown, Kiev tried to find the right words, as she stuttered, "M-mama, this is Savva."

"...Savva...who?" she then asked quietly, trying to get some specific details. The name was familiar, perhaps it was that one gentleman friend her daughter had told her about.

Katyusha couldn't waffle this any longer, "M-my boyfriend."

After a second of silence, Kievan Rus gave a round shape with her mouth, and a soft 'Oh.' sound. She had noticed something was off already with this boy. She then blinked in thought, and then said,

"Why don't you both come inside then? Then I can get better acquainted with your gentleman, da?"

Katyusha slowly got up, pulling Savva up with her. Well, at least her mother didn't seem too angry or anything. That was a good start.

As they got inside, where the candlelights were glowing, Kievan Rus took a long look at the boy, who stared dully at her, unafraid and unreceptive. Katyusha sat in a chair, her mother's back to her, and Savva was blocked out by Eva's height. So really, the seating arrangement was not favorable for Kiev.

The first thing Kievan Rus had noticed were the grey eyes. They were not natural. Human eyes were not normally gray. Plus they were so blank, they were almost mystical. There must have been something to this child that she didn't know.

She then noticed the cold aura about him. She swore that there was a blue-white wind wafting around him. She had the ability to see things others couldn't. She could see spiritual elements of people, when Katyusha couldn't. The coldness...he couldn't be human then...he had to be a spirit.

Kievan Rus then asked very softly to the boy, "Are you human?"

Knowing Katyusha couldn't see him, Savva shook his head, unafraid. Eva's eyebrows rose a little. So she was right. She was even more shocked when he mumbled, "I know she's not either. Or you..."

"How many years have you known my daughter?" she asked, brow furrowing. He held up one finger, and mumbled, "Since last spring."

She then asked, a little more audibly, "Do you love her?"

"I love him!" piped in Katyusha from her chair. Eva scolded her silently, and waited for the boy's answer. After a robotic blink, he nodded.

Eva, eyes soft, then asked, "I-If...if you ever had the chance, and she agreed to it...would you take her away from me?"

Katyusha wanted to stop her mother from asking something like that, but it was too late. Savva, after a second of thought, nodded. Eva glared for a single second, then realized, _he's still young..._

She sighed, and then said, "Do you _really_ love her?"

Savva opened his mouth, and said very solemnly, "Yes m'."

Eva smiled softly, eyes sympathetic, "Da. I can see...you really do love my daughter..."

Katyusha smiled. Her mother liked him? Good!...

"...Which is why I'll need to ask that you stop seeing her..."

Katyusha's heart jumped, and she choked out, "What?"

Savva looked down at the floor, and said nothing.

Eva then said firmly, but understandingly, "I'm sorry, but it's for the best right now."

"Mother you can't do tha-"

Eva ignorned Katyusha as she continued, "As you've probably already discovered young man, my daughter is a nation. I'm afraid that the risks are far too high for this to continue. I am sorry."

"Mama, please!"

"Goodnight Savva, thank you for keeping my daughter company..."

Savva barely nodded as he was shown the door, giving Katyusha one last melancholy look as he was sent out. As the room became warmer, Kiev's disbelief grew.

"Mama, he can't leave!"

"Yetkaterina, this is for your own good. This secret relationship of yours went too far. It needs to end, before you get hurt."

"Mama, he won't hurt me! He never would!"

"You'd never know, child. He's still young. He may not hurt you now, but when he gets older, he'll learn how to harm people. How he can become powerful."

"Mama! He wouldn't do that!"

"My dear, please listen, I know this is difficult to understand, but this is for the best! Yetkaterina, he's not a simple spirit of winter, he _is_ Winter!"

"W-What?"

"If he were a spirit, he wouldn't have known you were a nation. But a season...he would. He's the epitome of winter, child. When he grows, his power will become more hostile and cold. Please understand that. He may be a good person now, but in the future, we wouldn't know! I-If anything were to come from you two, it would mean disaster."

"B-but he-"

"Yetkaterina, you are not to see him again."

"Mama, please!"

"If I see him near you again, you will be punished."

"Mama, I love him!" cried Katyusha, tears running down her face.

"Yetkaterina, my word is final. You are not to see him again, and that is an order!"

"That's not fair!"

"It doesn't have to be! It's keeping you safe!"

"I am safe, he won't hurt me, I swear!"

"I am your mother, and you will listen to me!"

"You just don't want me to grow up!"

A slap cut off the shouting match, filling the air with dead silence. Kievan Rus' openfaced hand was in post swing, slowly falling, as she stared in bewilderment at her daughter, eyes about to spill with tears. Cheek red, Kiev clutched it, eyes wide in horror. Her own mother had _slapped_ her. _Hard._

Eva's mouth twitched, "...I...I..."

Katyusha backed up, tears angrily flowing again, as she shrieked madly, "I hate you!"

Her mother was left standing in horror, grief, and shock, as the girl ran out the door, into the night. Eva could have run after her, but she didn't. She couldn't...especially after what she had just done.

She covered her face with her hands, and cried silently, as she sat on her bed, praying she hadn't lost her only daughter.

_I just want you to grow up RIGHT..._

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><p>Katyusha ran out into the night, tears running down her face, as she blindly charged down the road. She tried to find the coldness she had grown accustomed to. She ran straight, trying to find the chill.<p>

Soon enough she felt it prick her legs, as she got closer to her special field. She staggered into the grass, trying to find the one she loved in the dark maze of night.

And as luck would have it, she found him, sitting under the tree. _Their_ tree. He looked up, surprised,

"Katyusha?"

She didn't even hesitate to lunge at him, clinging onto him tightly, as her angry tears soaked into his knit coat. He rubbed her back gently, but face ever so blank and unreadable.

He kissed the top of her head, as she cried, and growled how much she hated her mother.

And as her anger simmered to a steadier boil, she stared at the one she loved, and taken in by his voidless eyes, she crashed her lips into his, leaving him surprised. But eventually he snaked himself into the connection of lust.

Katyusha smirked with a near manic glee as she darted her tongue into his mouth.

Her mother would never have no clue as to how grown up she could be.

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><p><strong>So there's chapter five. Things are getting pretty exciting now. <strong>

**So I have now lifted the curtain on Savva's identity. He is a child incarnate of Winter. More detail will come later.**

**Next chapter might be steamier than normal. Depending on how it turns out, this story may or may not be changed to an M rating.**

**Read and review, or I give the characters lady-beards. By the way, you guys don't have to review if you don't want to. I try not to be a review whore, I just make the R&R threats to be funny. I only made one 'R&R or I quit' threat, and it was when I was tired and cranky. I'll never do something like that again. But the funny threats, I love doing.**

**Edit: So as you might have noticed, I changed young Ukraine's name to Kiev to give a little bit of historical accuracy in an already inaccurate fic. Kiev was an ancient name (thought not officially) for the Ukraine (this information I can't prove for certain, but some sources said this). It is also the name of the capital of Ukraine.**

**Haha, the next chapter is getting done pretty quickly, so it might be on here sooner. But stuff after that might be slower. Hell week is approaching for my school's musical that I'm in (Singin' in the Rain!) and I'll be super busy.**


	6. Time Cut Short with Nobody

**Okay, yeah, after I wrote this chapter, I decided this fic's going to be M rated. So, warning you folks, there's some ah...horny teenager antics (ie sex) written in this chapter. And I'm not a smut writer, mind you. So If you wanna avoid that stuff, scroll a little. Nothing too bad, but it's there.**

**This one was updated quicker, but the next one might be a little longer, because I have hell week for theater coming up soon.**

**So read and enjoy!**

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><p>"Ivan?" called Katyusha, to regain her brother's attention. His eyes were blinking, trying to comprehend the information she had just given him. As soon as she had told him of how her mother identified the boy, he seemed to shut off.<p>

He looked up, "S-so...Savva is Winter? As in _General_ Winter?"

Katyusha sighed and nodded, "Yes, he is."

"...o-oh...S-so you and General Winter were in love?"

"Ivan." she started, "Savva and General Winter may be the same physical body, but as people, they're far more different. The Winter I loved is not the same Winter we know today."

"Do you still love him?" Ivan then asked, mouth dry. He knew it was a daring question to ask, since she was going steady with Canada now, but he had to know.

"I am glad to say I do not love General Winter."

Ivan breathed a sigh of relief.

"...But as for Savva, I do sometimes wish he was here. Like I said Ivan, Savva and the General are the same, but so very different. But I have moved on. Savva is gone, and I have Matvey now."

She then smirked with a bittersweetness, "But I do owe Savva one token of thanks."

She looked at Ivan, eyes cracked slightly with mirthless-ness.

_If whatever happened that night didn't happen, things would be very different now..._

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><p>Kiev stopped in her tracks for the second time as she made a slow painful walk home. The gurgling, croaking, chirping noises of nighttime ocassionally peppered the air. The noise was usually unsettling for a girl like her, walking alone at night, but right now, she didn't care. She didn't even really hear them. Her head was already pounding and swimming with an endless sea of thoughts and emotion.<p>

She took a deep breath, letting the nightime air come into her mouth, moistening her dry throat. It was nearly four o'clock in the morning, but Katyusha didn't even feel tired yet. She was far too nervous to be. Far too excited, far too sore.

She was close to being able to fully retrace the events that occured over the last five hours or so, starting from when Savva returned her rough, angry kiss. She could almost retrace his kiss, tasting like sweet melon from the foreign traveling vendors at the market. His hands, as they laced around her waist, pressing into the clothing firmly, so she could feel his below normal body temperature.

She could feel her mouth still tingle from the power, as she remembered how _when they released each other for air, it was necessary, but disappointing, as they continued to lock onto each other for the spark of combining his cold and her warmth. When they grew less excited with tongue curving kisses to the mouth, he began to apply sloppy open mouthed kisses to her neck, leaving little red marks occasionally. The coldness made Katyusha's skin tingle with an unnatural delight, and she moaned under her breath._

Her feet brushed against the dirt, leaving little dust puffs from her shoes. The inner softness of the footwear was pleasant, but very smothering, in comparison to _the cool grass she felt as she slipped off her shoes, kicking them into the night, discarded. Savva dug his heels into the ground, hissing slightly as she kissed his jaw needfully, allowing his boots to be pried off by his feet as he did so. His feet were surprisingly very nimble looking, and the toenails were finely cut and clean. As he lay on his back, allowing her to cradle on top of him, he let his bare feet lock around her calves, eliciting a small shiver from her._

Katyusha felt her hair drooping against her shoulders, as she walked. It was tangled, pieces of dirt sprinkling into the dull silver-blonde, knotted around the strands. It would fall out, the dirt. Her hair would still be unexplainably messy for a short while.

_She lay on her back, head in the grass, hair spilled out as he carefully unbuttoned her blouse. Her shawl lay in a discarded heap about a foot from the tree. With each unbuttoned closure, Savva gave a cool kiss to her chest, and payed respectful but impressed detail to her larger womanly assets. Stroking one sensually caused her to gasp a little, and her fingers shakily fumbled to remove his large coat. He arched his back up a little, to help shrug the heavy coat off, revealing a pale white undershirt over his milky white skin. His build was rather skinny, but Katyusha couldn't help but find it attractively slender._

Katyusha sighed as she felt the air of night envelop her. It was warm, but for some reason, she couldn't stand it. She wanted the cold wafting near her again.

_"K-katyusha..." he hissed, rocking his body towards hers, breath cold in her ear as she kissed the crook of his neck softly, her fingers stroking his chest as he twitched slightly, "Katyusha, enough teasing..."_

_"I'm not teasing..." she argued, enjoying the chilled smoothness of his snow-white skin. It was so beautiful for her._

_As her dress was fully shrugged away from her shoulders, ending at her stomach, he pressed his belly to hers, kissing her chest as he stiffened. His pants were now increasingly uncomfortable. He cursed himself for losing self control, and as he moved his hand down to deal with this embarrassing discomfort, Katyusha's warm hand took hold of his._

Katyusha sighed as she thought of Savva more. How he made her laugh, how he made her smile, how he made her angry. Not just slightly angry, but in a rage sometimes. She was never that way when with...her mother. Her mother always saw her as a shy girl, but Savva brought out her true personality. He thought she was rather reactive to things, and stubborn.

She remembered how he had smiled at her as they talked. How he had asked her, _"Are you sure you want to do this, bunny?" as he watched her slide her dress off, leaving her free to him._

_She nodded, slightly nervous, knowing there was no going back, "Y-yes. Yes, I'm sure."_

_She wanted him, he wanted her. She could care less about her mother, she spat in her mind, as her body ached with hungry need._

_As he helped prop her upright, she could only feel the mix between fire and ice grow even more intense when she saw the cold smile on his face, gray eyes reflecting lust and predatorial emotion._

Kiev regretted not accepting Savva's idea of laying in the grass for their time together. She reasoned that she didn't want to have sex in an open field where there was the offchance of being seen (Savva said this was ridiculous, but didn't bother arguing, heck they were both horny). They were in the safety of the trees. But the bad part of her idea was allowing herself to be propped up against the trunk of their tree as they moved in passion and rhythm. Her back would be sore in the morning with scratches from the bark, and her skin would be red and swollen, but nothing a bathing wouldn't fix. As long as Kievan Rus never found out.

_"Ah! Sa-savva!" she moaned under her breath as they moved at a steady but needful pace. Her back stung as the rough bark of the tree dug into her bare skin, but she didn't care. The pain seemed to actually spur her harder. Savva giggled under his breath as he kissed her chest and neck feverishly. Now this warmth, the warmth she emanated now, he could enjoy._

_"Savva, please, move faster..." Katyusha whispered, as she clutched his torso tightly, kissing his taut shoulders and collarbone._

_"Oh gods...Yetkaterina..." he moaned with a whisper barely louder than the wind, mumbling her name a few times like a sacred prayer, as he kissed the side of her head, burying his nose in her hair. As they picked up the pace, Kiev could barely pretend to care about anything, as the snow-haired man she loved connected to her in a special, sacred way that was dying to be shared. She forgot for an instant about how she was a nation, how he was a season's incarnate, and how she had hurt her mother._

_"I-I love you Savva..."_

_"I know...I love you too..." he grunted, as he neared his peak._

_For only an instant, as he said those words, she forgot about everything else. For only an instant._

_"S-Savva!" she cried, words catching in her throat, as she reached her end, clutching onto him tightly, as her body trembled in iced-hot pleasure. He followed shortly after, releasing his cold essence into her with a gasped chuckled breath. He slumped onto her, mindful to not crush her, as his energy was sapped._

Katyusha shook the thoughts out of her head as she rubbed her tired eyes. She herself wouldn't be able to fall asleep for a while, so it seemed. But her eyes were heavy. She was lucky to have dozed off with Savva after their _activities_, having held him close. But she wished she could have held him even closer.

_A couple hours later, Kiev opened her heavy eyes, feeling the heavy coat of her lover draped over her. It took her a second to realize she was still naked, feeling the grass tickle her side. She felt cooled skin draped around her, holding her in a gentle bond. She fidgeted a little, before turning over, and seeing her lover laying next to her, under the tree, eyes closed in sleep._

_'He looks so peaceful', thought Katyusha, with a smile._

_His eye slowly opened, and those gray blank irises stared at her. Taking her unsheathed natural features in. He tilted his head, as if to show affection, and sitting up, mumbled, "Katyusha..."_

_"Hm?" she asked, blinking drowsily, ready to snuggle into the coat again._

_"It's time for me to leave..."_

_"W-what? No!", she protested, eyes wide with disbelief. He couldn't leave! She loved him more than anything, and he loved her back. If he left her, what would she do?_

_"I think it's for the best...your mother doesn't want me near you, and I can't stay around for much longer. The air will soon be too warm for me to handle..."_

_"Savva, you can't leave me!" she started, lump forming in her throat._

_"Bunny, I'm not going to leave you. I'll be back, I promise. In the winter. You'll see..." he started, voice strangely gentle. He was getting up, and starting to redress._

_"T-then what if I come with you?" she started, near manic, rushing to redress. He smiled sadly, chuckling,_

_"Yetkaterina, your mother, she loves you. She just wants what's best for you...even I can see that. You need to stay here...I'll come back when I'm needed. The summer will be short, but the winter season will be long."_

_Putting on his coat and hat, he smiled sadly once again, eyes surprisingly emotional as he took her hands gently, and helped her button her dress up. He kissed her very softly, feeling both happy and embarrassed that she helped him feel good about his humanity for once._

_He knew for quite a long time, perhaps for the last sixty years, that he was the incarnate of Winter, and this made him above mortal humans. He was often skeptical of humans and nations, especially after how he was treated by his father as he lost his mortal human identity. Every year, he slowly became less and less human, and more season. And before he met Kiev, he welcomed it fully. He hated his human features, and wanted them to melt away like the ice. He knew he'd grow colder and colder as time went on, to the point where his heart would remain in ice. He'd become cruel, he'd know. He'd regret it now. He knew he'd lose concern for regret and conscience at some certain point. His hatred for his humanity initially had made him want to speed up the process of becoming completely spiritual, a complete season. But now, he wished he could make it even slower. He wished. He knew it wouldn't happen. He couldn't stop from becoming Winter. It would happen eventually. One day, before his decayed understanding of kindness disappeared, maybe he'd tell Katyusha. So she could understand. He just hoped that when his time to return came, he'd have the chance._

_He finally let go of her, leaving her with a saddened face, pleading for him not to leave. With a bittersweet half smile, he gave a nod of his head, and turned away, walking off into the night._

_"W-wait!" she cried, fumbling to slip her shoes on, running to catch up to him. When she tried to find his trail, she saw him walking out of the field, his form mixing with the darkness. The air grew warm, as Katyusha ran closer, and he disappeared out of sight, vanishing into the night as he walked off into nowhere._

_When he was no longer visible, Katyusha cried out, "Savva! Sa-Savva!"_

_She stumbled around in the dark trying to find where the familiar cold air wafted, but to her dismay, the air was steadily warm. She stumbled around more, calling for Savva to come back, until she sank down, and cried._

_He was gone._

Katyusha snapped back to present day, feeling warmth and wetness on her cheeks. She must have started crying again. He was really gone...she couldn't believe it. The fact that it was still spring made her feel even more upset. He'd not be back until wintertime...that was months and months away.

She quickly wiped her eyes, stopping her tears. She'd just have to be patient and wait for him to come back. She could then spend as much time as she wanted with him, regardless of what her mother said.

..._Mama_...

Katyusha felt a rock sink in her stomach, as she remembered how angry she had made her mother, and how she had stormed out of the house. Her throat tightened as her eyes burned again. She remembered quite clearly how her mother had _slapped_ her, and how Katyusha screamed that she hated her. She...she didn't hate her. No, no, Katyusha couldn't hate her mother...She was just so angry with her for trying to part her and Savva.

Savva seemed to agree that her mother was right...damn it...well, she didn't have to worry now, Savva was gone.

Kiev's walk home was incredibly torturous as she could only imagine how angry Kievan Rus would be when she went inside. She tried to make the walk slower to pass time, but it only seemed to pick up as she could see the candle-lit glow coming from her house.

When she shakily stepped inside, anticipating her mother to roar angrily at her or punish her, she was surprised to see that it was all quiet.

She turned her head to see Eva in bed. As Katyusha stepped closer, she saw that her mother was still in her day clothes, laying on top of the sheets and blankets. Her eyes were closed in sleep, fitfully. Red from crying, but dry.

Katyusha felt even guiltier, realizing her mother must have fallen asleep, crying and hoping for her daughter to come back and forgive her.

Katyusha didn't want forgiveness from her, she wanted her mother to forgive _her_. She began to cry silently, as she sat down onto the bed slowly, and lay next to Eva.

"_Mama..._" she whispered, "_I'm so sorry..._"

She shuddered a little, avoiding her gaze from her mother's face.

"...Yetkaterina?..." her mother mumbled, her eyes slowly opening. She saw Kiev laying next to her, crying, and heard her apologizing. Oh, she didn't need to apologize for anything. She didn't have to. Kievan Rus was just relieved that her daughter didn't hate her.

Eva stared at her daughters' teary face, and said tiredly, "_Katyusha..._"

Being addressed informally by her mother, Kiev looked up, trying to blink away guilty tears.

"...You're a good girl..." her mother smiled, wearily. She wrapped her arms around Yetkaterina, in a tight, bonding hug.

Katyusha cried even more. _Her mother had forgiven her._ She smiled brokenly, as she snuggled next to her mother, relieved.

She finally was able to sleep well that night.

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><p><strong>Yeah, I warned you. Sorry for those who expected hot kinky lemon. I had to write something, so I kind of winged it. Everything else after this will be pretty PG.<strong>

**So to explain Savva, he _is _Winter, but he's not quite General. He's growing colder and colder, so his attitude and personality are slowly changing, as he becomes less human. He really does love Katyusha, but he's regretting that he will be different when he sees her again.**

**While Ivan is no doubt horrified from this image (his sister and Winter gettin' it awn), this is not the big reveal. But it's almost here! Next chapter Ukraine's secret will be revealed. And nobody spoil it if you have a guess. You can PM me, but I'll shoot down all your guesses (even if you're right)**

**I know a bunch of you guys wanted a better description of Savva, as to what he looked like. Well I decided to kind of draw a ten minute concept idea on MS paint. Key word ten minutes. Beware this is kind of sucky compared to my normal art:**

**http: / /tinypic. com/ r/ 2 d k h 9 x u / 5**

**(remove the spaces)**

**Read and Review or I'll change the ending to something really stupid, like something involving Ronald McDonald.**


	7. Secret of Nobody

**This chapter is shorter, but it's kind of the climax. Enjoy it friends. It's short, but cool.**

**THE SECRET IS AT THE END. BUT READ IT.**

**Read and Review or this becomes a musical. A bad one.**

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><p>Eyes watering as she jerked forward once more, Katyusha retched violently into the bowl held by her mother, emptying her stomach of its contents, for the second time that morning. Her throat stung as the upturned half-digested matter flowed through, and she felt herself involuntarily coughing. This felt awful. She had never thrown up like this before.<p>

Eva was relieved and her worry vanished when she saw her daughter was not throwing up blood, or bleeding from the nose as she got sick. That meant her country was not in danger, and if she was ill, she was not going to die from it, since she was a nation. Nations were not immortal, but there was very little that could kill them, from what she knew. So within a few days, she guessed Katyusha would be fine, and that she just had a stomach issue or ate some bad food.

For the rest of the day, Katyusha lay in the bed, absolutely restless. Now that her stomach was empty, she didn't feel sick, or have a fever. She was uncomfortably warm from her thick nightgown, and the blankets on the bed were too hot and irrating for her, as she lay in the midmorning sun. Since she had slept rather soundly the whole night through, she was not in need to fall asleep.

"Mama, can I get up now? I don't have a fever and I don't feel sick anymore!"

"No Yetkaterina." replied Eva calmly, not turning her head, as her back faced the girl, while she cooked soup in their kettle.

"But I feel fine!"

"You might feel well right now, but it's best we wait until tomorrow. In case you feel any worse, da?"

Katyusha sighed, and lay back on her pillow. She was fine with the fact that she had to stay inside. But she was just so _bored_.

"Are you hungry enough for soup, child?" asked Eva as she filled a bowl with beet soup.

"I guess." muttered Katyusha sullenly, as she carefully took the bowl of rich red broth. It was very plain, not much other vegetables or meats in it. Eva believed that since Katyusha had been throwing up, indulgent soup would not be a wise meal.

Katyusha put the spoon to her lips, blowing on the steaming broth to cool it. As she sipped at it, she shifted her bottom lip slightly as she realized how tasteless it was. It was just beet soup. Nothing special in it.

She stared at the liquid. There was nothing special to it, unless something was added. It was blank. Bland.

Unexcited.

_Savva._

Katyusha had not seen her lover for the last two months, ever since that night they shared together. She wondered very often how he was, what he was doing, and if he was really going to come back. She had trudged through the months of April and May, time slipping slower than molasses. The months were just so strange without him being there. It was even stranger, because from up until that time, Katyusha's 'monthly' had occured regularly. Now it had been well over a month since her last one. She didn't really think much of it though, not bothering to tell her mother.

She stared into the blank soup, thinking of his eyes. Feeling exceptionally miserable now, she began to cry, not bothering to curse herself for it.

Her mother turned her head, and asked worriedly, "Child, what is the matter?"

Kiev blubbered, "I...I miss Savva!"

Kievan Rus processed the answer in her head a second, and sighed, rubbing her forehead. Oh, this was about _him_. She had been hoping that after these last few months, Kiev had gotten over her silly, yet dangerous romance. From what she knew, he'd been gone ever since that night she asked him to leave. Kiev, ever since, had remained within her sight almost all the time. And now she was _crying_ over it. Well, this sure was pleasant.

But then again, she thought. Maybe she was being a little bit too unsympathetic with Yetkaterina. After all, she and that Winter had been together for a year or more, without her knowing. But Yetkaterina would one day have to understand, she did the right thing. She didn't send him away because he was evil or hurting her daughter. She did it, because it was for the best. To keep her safe. Winter may have been kind then, but in the years to come, it'd become colder. She was just glad that nothing_ fruitful_ came from her daughter's relationship with Winter. The results could become disastrous.

She gently rubbed her daughter's back, sighing, "When you're older, you'll understand why. It's to keep you safe. And it's for his own good too. He was smart enough to know that."

Katyusha pouted, tears running down her cheeks. She was perfectly safe with Savva. Why didn't her mother understand_ that_?

Eva rolled her eyes, noticing her daughter's pouty lip. She then sighed again, and smiling weakly, said, "You're too young for such a relationship. when you're a fully grown nation, you'll be able to make decisions without me. Da?"

Katyusha, almost as if the happy fairy danced on her head, sprang into the opposite emotion, smiling, "T-then when I get older, I'll get back Savva!"

She laughed giddily, much to her mother's confusion and exasperation.

_She still doesn't get it. And why did she just become so happy all of a sudden?_

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><p>She was even more confused when about ten minutes later, Yetkaterina was growling in an intense rage about how she hated the bed, and being confined indoors. Teenage hormones, she guessed.<p>

"Yetkaterina, what is going _on_? Are you still sick?" asked Eva worriedly as she came in through the door.

Gasping for breath, lurched over the table, Kiev shook a little as she staggered back upright. She wiped her mouth weakly, upset beyond all reason. The house smelled like vomit now, but she could hardly care. She was dying. She was convinced she was dying, and that her vomiting was because of it. She had been sick in the mornings at least three times this week. It was so tiring. Not to mention her recent bouts of exhaustion.

"M-Mama, I think I'm dying!" she wailed slightly, swaying up, to grasp onto her mother. She shook with fear and weariness.

Kievan Rus tilted her head, as her daughter cried, "Why would you think you're dying?"

"I-I've been sick almost every morning, and I'm so tired, I feel like I'll pass out! My mood's been so strange, changing all the time! A-And...th-the blood's stopped. Does that mean I'm dying?"

"Blood?" repeated Eva, trying to process. She then thought a moment, and paused, "...you mean your menstruation? For how long?"

"I-I think that's what it is...but i-it's stopped for the last month and a half..."

Kievan Rus jolted a little in concern. A month and a half was was very concerning. If Yetkaterina had missed her period for that long, then...

...no, she couldn't have. She was still a virgin wasn't she?

Eva opened her mouth, and said slowly, "Yetkaterina, I need you to show me your stomach a moment."

"W-what?"

"Take off your shirt, so I can see your stomach darling." she said, panic slightly in her voice.

Still confused, Katyusha peeled off her blouse, revealing her pale skin. She looked down, as her mother examined her belly. Eva's hand's felt at her stomach gently, pressing at the sides every so often. She watched her mother nervously gaze at the side of her stomach.

Until now, Katyusha didn't realize that her stomach was slightly...bigger.

When Eva pressed Katyusha's stomach once more, she gasped. Her face was wide in surprise...disbelief...shock..._horror_.

She slowly rose up, and gazed, eyes frozen in shock as she stared in bewilderment at her daughter's confused face.

"_How_?"

"M-mama?"

"How? How did you get pregnant?"

"Pregnant? M-mama, I don't know how-"

Katyusha's face drained of color, as she realized what was wrong. She wasn't ill...she was carrying a baby. She was going to be a mother...

Eva pulled Katyusha by her shoulders, so they were face to face. She whispered dangerously, almost angrily,

"Was it him? Did you sleep with _him_?"

"W-with who, mama?"

"_Winter_, the boy!" she growled, sounding panicked, not so much as angry.

"Y-yes..."

Eva's lilac tinted eyes shrank, and horror washed over her face. She shook slightly.

"Mother?"

Eva stared at the floor, eyes wide in panic. She was murmuring words in her language, under her breath.

"Mama, what's wrong? I-is there something wrong?"

Eva pulled her daughter in, closer, and with a small smile of hysteria on her face, she murmured,

"My child...do you realize what you've just done to yourself?"

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><p>"So...you were pregnant with Winter's baby?" asked Ivan, setting down his teacup, trembling slightly, with all the information his sister had given him.<p>

"Yes Ivan."

He then sighed, "So I can assume that it couldn't survive, could it. Seasons and nations can't have children together, da?"

"Nyet Ivan. The child survived. Barely. Seasons and nations can have children, but it's highly dangerous..."

"What happened to the child then?" he then asked, hearing Katyusha's voice tense up.

"He grew up."

"'He'? Well, is he still alive?"

"Yes."

So Ukraine had a child? Russia was an uncle? Okay, could figure out where this boy was, and reunite him with Ukraine. This could make her happy again maybe. Winter's child or not, he was family, right?

"Do you know where he is? Are you still in touch with him?"

"Yes. Quite a lot." she said, hesitantly, not looking at Ivan.

"Where is he now?"

"Here." she whispered.

"Here in Russia? St. Petersberg or something?"

"No. Right here."

Ivan paused a moment, trying to piece it all together, "What are you saying sestra?"

Katyusha sighed, nervous, realizing this was it, "Ivan...you remember what I told you about your mother?"

"Our mother? She died when I was born, right?"

"...No...that was a lie I told you." she sighed, still looking at the floor.

Ivan's eyes widened slightly, confused and nervous, "Ka-Katyusha?"

She stared up at Ivan scared blue eyes meeting his confused violets.

"Ivan..." she stated, "_I_ am your mother."


	8. Birth of Nobody

**I'm apologizing in advance to say that the next chapter might not be out for a longer time, since I'm really busy for the next few weeks. We'll see.**

**But anyway, this chapter is much longer than the others, for a good reason. Most is put in third person view towards Kievan Rus.**

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><p>Kiev had grown rather concerned about her mother for the next few weeks. Ever since the day Kiev became aware of her pregnancy, Kievan Rus was not the same.<p>

Now, every morning, when Kiev awoke, Kievan Rus no longer said good morning to her, or smiled. She just sat in that wooden chair by the window, looking outside. With a blank expression. It was as if she wasn't even there anymore.

Katyusha had tried to understand why her mother was acting so. She remembered how that night, after her mother asked her if she knew what she had done, getting herself pregnant, she said she didn't know. Her mother's face just went blank, and she just looked at the ground. As she looked at the ground, she just turned away, and sat on the bed. She didn't even cry or anything. She just sat there, with nothing on her face. And she just lay down, eyes still open and unblinking, as she just stared into space. Katyusha wasn't even sure if her mother went to sleep that night.

But in any case, this change in her mother disturbed Katyusha deeply. She was worried that her mother was going to leave, or something. She had never been like this before. And if this was going to get worse, was there any possibility of anything getting better?

She had been so worried this whole time, she could barely think about her baby. Or the bulge in her stomach she called a baby. Whenever it did cross her mind, she grew both excited and scared. Moreso scared. What would it be like? What would her child look like? A boy or girl?

_Did Savva know? Did he know that he was a father?_

He had been gone for months, and nobody could tell where he was now. Where would Winter go when he was no longer needed? Katyusha worried about him, and if he was doing well. But then she considered thinking of what he might have done for his other several lonely months away...maybe he didn't mind it.

She was excited at the idea of seeing him again, when the snow fell. She could tell him about everything that was happening, and ask him about his months away from her. She hoped that he'd be happy with the fact he'd sired a child, and she couldn't help but wonder if they would raise it together. Eva got angry whenever he was mentioned, and she had forbidden Katyusha multiple times from the prospect of ever seeing him again.

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><p>It was a few days later, when Katyusha woke up and found her mother, as abnormally-usual, sitting, facing the window in silence. Eva was still wearing a pink dyed nightgown, even though it was fairly late in the morning for her. The teenage nation sat up silently in bed, sheets rustling slightly. She stared at her mother, who's hair glistened with silver age in the morning sun.<p>

For the next three minutes, the young girl's blue eyes were fixated on her mother, who was as still as a statue, rigidly straight.

Yetkaterina jolted a little when she heard her mother utter something, for the first time in days.

"Yetkaterina..."

Her voice sounded cracked and unused, the throat having numbed from lack of speaking.

"...yes, mother?" she asked quietly.

There was silence for a moment, before a sharp breath emitted from Eva's nose, as she asked calmly,

"Do you realize how having a child will affect you?"

"...I...I'll be a mother...?"

"That's a given. But do you realize how it will affect you as a _nation_?"

"...Well...m-my baby might be a nation too."

"Not 'might', it _will_ be a nation, child..."

She turned to face her daughter who sat in the bed, and with a mirthless smile, sighed, "...but for how long, we won't know..."

"...Mother what do you mean?"

"Kiev, as you know, you yourself as a nation, you're...small. The reason you're so small is that when you were growing within me, I took a part of my own land, and let it grow independently. I only gave up a small part, so it didn't affect me...but..."

Her eyes glimmered slightly as she continued, "...This child might be the death of you."

Katyusha's eyes widened, "W-what?"

"Nations require land to live. And when a nation mothers another nation, there is the possibility of them dying off when they let their offspring grow."

"...D-does that mean...?"

"Not right away dear, but I'm concerned that when your child grows, you'll disappear...Especially since it's sired by a season, it's going to be very difficult for you...because the winter weather will probably affect it."

Her daughter frowned a little, not appreciating how her mother used the word 'sired'. Savva wasn't some primitive animal, he was human too...partially.

Katyusha thought a moment, "M-mother...does this mean that...one day you'll disappear too?"

Kievan Rus sighed, and after a long pause, said, "Yes. But it is unavoidable. Everyone will disappear one day, regardless as to wether they're a nation or not. But as mother to a nation, it will be much sooner than expected."

"M-mama..." started Kiev, who was starting to cry, "Y-you're not going to leave me, are you?"

Eva smiled brokenly, "Don't fret child. I'm not going anywhere for a long time."

Yetkaterina shook a little, feeling slightly relieved. But then her stomach got heavy, "B-but what about when my baby is born, what will happen to me?"

Eva walked over to the bed, and sitting down on the edge, stroked her daughter's hair. She smiled soothingly, although her eyes reflected worry.

"We're not going to worry about that now. I'll think of something. You're most certainly going to see this child grow up well."

Eva's pale fingers sifted through a lock of her daughter's hair once again, as she smiled cheerfully, the smile being a brilliant mask for her worried eyes.

_I'm going to make sure my daughter and grandchild grow up together, if it's the last thing I do._

Her hope for that faltered only slightly, when in December, after nine months of tension, Katyusha caught a cold.

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><p>The cold didn't last only a few days. No it lasted longer, and got worse, to the point where the poor girl was near delerious with fever and weak.<p>

"Mmm-mama, Mama, can I _please_ get out of bed _now_?"

"Yetkaterina, if I said it once, I'll say it again. Nyet. You're sick, and your baby is due any day now."

"B-but I'm _hot_...I want to g-go outside and cool off."

"That is your fever speaking, child. If you're hot, you can take off that blanket, but you are not going outside, understood? The snow is falling and it's cold."

_But that's why I want to go out! So I can see Savva!,_ thought Katyusha angrily, as her glazed eyes stared at her large belly. She could _see_ the lovely snowflakes falling down, dusting the air and leaving the ground a blinding white. She imagined Savva out there, asking, 'Bunny, where are you?'.

Okay, she wasn't near delerious, she was just that.

"With your fever and your baby almost here, we need to keep you in here." chided Eva gently. She was getting worried about her daughter now. Yetkaterina had never been this sick before. And from what she knew, women didn't normally have fevers when they were pregnant. Plus the girl was so weak now. She could barely stand up. Eva was trying to repress the worry that her daughter would die giving birth to a child of Winter.

"Speaking of baby..." she continued, "Any contractions yet?"

"N-nuh-uh." blubbered her daughter, who lay her head on the pillow restlessly. The thing was, she really wasn't listening, or caring. She was too lost in her own fogged mind to even sense anything. She didn't even realize that her water had actually broken about a half hour ago. Eva couldn't tell, because of the blankets.

It was about another ten minutes later when Katyusha drunkenly decided that she had enough of this confinement, and in a hot, weak fury, she swung her legs over the bed, and staggered on both feet. She was going to see Savva, wether her mother liked it or not.

Her mother glared, and pointed back to the bed, as Katyusha weakly started forward, tottering steps towards the door.

"Yetkaterina, get back in bed now!"

"I-Iiiii...I just want to get some air!" she whined.

Eva glared with annoyance, and sternness, and with a sigh of defeat, said, "Alright, but if you leave the front of the house, you're punished. I'm going to watch you. Don't be out longer than three minutes."

Katyusha smiled dopily as she staggered out the door, legs spread slightly.

Eva peered out the window, as she saw Katyusha stand swaying in the yard. Her feet were bare. Good lord, she was going to freeze out there if she wasn't careful.

For a small, pointless moment, Eva turned her head, to see the bed, sheets spilled on the ground. She took immediate notice to the slightly darker stain in the middle of it.

She stepped closer for further inspection, and it didn't take her long to realize that it was amnotic fluid. That meant...

She looked back outside, only to see Katyusha waddling away off into the cold front, weakly, but efficiently.

Eva cursed under her breath as she raced around the one room home, grabbing her coat, Katyusha's, and a large piece of her special pink fabric that was tucked away in her coat pocket.

_I told her to stay here...,_ growled Eva in her head as she stormed out, after her daughter.

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><p>"Savva...<em>S-Savvaaaa.<em>.." whined Katyusha weakly as she staggered out in the fluffy but chilling snow. Her feet were bare, but she hardly noticed.

_Katyusha..._ she could hear in the drifting air. She couldn't see him, but the voice...it was for real.

"Savva?"

_Katyusha...,_ he started, _...just how long have you been holding that damn child in? It's wanting out, now._

It was finally at this moment, that she actually realized that she was in a lot of pain, and weak from her fever, stepped forward, and nearly doubled over. She could feel the baby pressing harshly, leaving her agonized. She fell, hands bracing her stomach, as she expected the cold ground.

Until her mother caught her by the arms.

"Yetkaterina!" she glared angrily, "I told you to stay in the yard! What on earth are you doing?"

"M-mama..." she groaned, as a harsh contraction boiled through, "I-it hurts..."

"Yes, child, I know. You're in labor, now if we get back inside, we can-"

Katyusha dropped to the ground, knees giving out, as she gave a cry of pain. Her lungs sucked in air greedily, as she felt like blacking out.

Eva's eyes widened, as she knelt over her daughter. This was serious. The baby wouldn't be here in an hour, or two. It would be here almost _now_. Katyusha hadn't realized until now that she had been in labor for a good five hours, her fever making her delerious.

Katyusha couldn't move, as she twitched in pain and weariness. She felt the need to fall asleep but the pain kept her awake. It throbbed every so often, leaving her body shaking with fever and agony.

The sight caused Eva to trace back to memories from many many years ago. The memories of her laying alone in the cold forest, wind howling and ice chilling, as she cried from the harsh pangs of labor, face clenched in pain, as she strained to bring forth the nation she was mother to. The memories of the first sight of the small one, as she emerged into the world, landing in her mother's hands instead of the cold snow. The memories of nobody else being around to hear her daughter's first cry, the cries signaling life was started. The memories of when the small new life was clasped close to her mother's chest, hearts beating together.

Kievan Rus realized that Kiev's experience was going to be quite similar to hers. She wouldn't be able to get her back inside in time to prepare her for a 'proper' birth, especially since she couldn't move. How fitting that Winter's offspring would be born in the snow. At least he'd be able to see it, thought Kievan Rus with slight contempt, as she gazed on the falling snowflakes that were sprinkling her daughter's hair.

She sighed, and kneeling down, took off her coat, rolling it into a ball. She propped her daughter up as she slid the coat underneath, acting as a pillow. She then took Kiev's coat, and wrapped it around the girl, to keep her warm.

She then took her pink fluffy fabric as she settled down in front of Kiev, face soft.

"Alright child, lucky for the father, he gets to see this. It's too late to take you in now."

"Maaa-ma-mama..." the blue eyed girl uttered in her throat as tears ran down her red cheeked face. Another wave of pain came through, and she choked on a sob.

"Yetkaterina, I'm here, sweetheart. Remember to breathe, alright?"

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><p>She could only watch as Katyusha gasped hysterically, as her child was fighting its way into the world. Her fists clenched as she felt another rush of pain come through, crying from the throat.<p>

Eva spread the girl's legs, her skirt acting as a dark tent, "Child, I think you need to push now."

"N-nono!" she gasped, as she felt the pain get worse. She squirmed, hands surfing in the snow below her. The cold...it felt nice.

"Alright, I'll give you the count of three. One..."

Katyusha breathed in heavily as she tried to ignore the pain. Was Savva watching? Was he waiting for their little one?

"...Two..."

As snowflakes brushed along her face as she raised her head up towards the sky, gray and cloudy, she tried to imagine each one that fell on her as a word of encouragement from him.

"...Three."

Katyusha pushed, jaw clenching as she felt the pain grow sharper and rigid. But Eva looked, and shook her head.

"Nothing yet. I'll need you to push again."

But Katyusha didn't want to. Her energy was already dying off. She had never felt to tired in her life. She wanted to sleep, but her body wouldn't let her.

"Yetkaterina, push." her mother said, void of any softness.

And with a gasp of air, she finally did, feeling a queer stretch in her abdomen, as she felt a slight warmth from between her legs. Eva's eyes widened, and with a bit of an excited smile, she looked up at her daughter's twisted face.

"I can see the top of its head. One more time. A _big_ push, alright?"

The stretching pain was becoming too much for the girl. She gritted her teeth as she cried, and struggled to break the child free.

She gave a gasped sob, as she clenched the snow tightly in her right fist. She shivered as she felt a warm mass slide out of her, into the cold winter air. Her mother caught it in her hands, bodily fluid dyeing the snow below the newborn a transparent reddish-peach, and effectively melting the snow it stained. Katyusha let her head fall back, exhausted beyond all reason to even care about the child she just bore. Before she could think anything else, she gave way to the dizzying blackness.

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><p>Kievan Rus felt a slight sense of excited hysteria as she held the small life in her soft, cold hands. It actually was much smaller than she expected. Smaller than a normal baby. And for a child of Winter, it was surprisingly, warm.<p>

She had to stop referring to it as 'it'. She looked at the moist red-smeared package, examining it. Eva was able to determine very quickly that it was a little boy. She watched intently for a minute, as she gazed over the child's features. Little hands and toes, a round face, eyes closed shut. She'd not be able to determine their color for a while it seemed. And a very thin layer of silver-blonde hair was matted down. Had Kievan Rus not been aware of the circumstances, she could have very well mistaken the baby as her own.

_He looks just like Yetkaterina did.._. she thought, feeling a warmth of euphoria in her chest. She stroked the newborn's head, the slickness of birth beginning to air off from the freezing weather. The boy barely shivered as snow touched his fresh, soft body.

Eva sighed, dread filling her as she looked at her grandchild, and her now unconscious daughter. Both were barely there. She lay one of her cold hands on Yetkaterina's forehead, and it was warmed by the strength of the fever. Dread settled deeper as Eva realized that this was not a good sign. Yetkaterina was not moving, and her breaths were slow. And it was at this very moment that Eva realized the baby wasn't crying or moving either.

Feeling slightly panicked, Eva lifted the newborn boy close to her, as she put her ear next to his chest, looking for a heartbeat.

_No. No, he couldn't be stillborn._

And he wasn't. He just was barely breathing.

Brushing a lock of silvery strand behind her ear, Eva gave a half-hearted sigh of relief. Neither of them were dead, but neither of them were safe.

Kievan Rus' fears were true all along. Kiev was too small of a nation to mother a baby properly. She had a high chance of dying if something wasn't done. And the child...was too weak. Too small. The land he represented was most certainly miniscule and of little value. If Kievan Rus didn't think of something fast, the child was as good as dead as well.

And she knew what to do. There was no going back, but she would not regret it.

But she knew that she had to get them inside first. The cold would do no good for them.

* * *

><p>Taking out a small knife from her shawl, with careful precision, Kievan Rus cut the cord that connected Kiev and her baby. She held the little one gently, so as not to crush him, and took the large piece of pink fabric. She used one corner to clean the birth blood off the child, dipping it in the snow for moisture. She then took the rest of the fabric, and wrapped the now clean newborn in it. He'd stay nice and warm until she got him inside. She kept the child in one hand, and quickly darted back into the house, about fifty feet away from her. She took a basket, and placing a pillow in it, lay the baby gently down into it, beside the bed. Then running back, she went to get Kiev.<p>

The girl was sprawled out in the snow, sweat from fever and exhaustion from giving birth still clinging to her body. Kievan Rus shakily picked up her daughter in both arms, cradling her as she gently took her back home. Kiev's skirt was soaked by snow and birth fluid, but her mother could care less.

She lay her daughter in the bed, tucking the covers over her gently. Now both mother and child would be warm...but they were not safe just yet.

Kievan Rus watched her daughter lay in the bed, breathing slow and ill. Kiev's face was matured, pointed with a feminine grace to it. She no longer looked like a little girl anymore, her hair long and flowing, and her face relaxed with a seriousness shaped into it. Until this time, Kievan Rus had never realized how much her daughter had really changed. But her face...as much as it had changed, she still saw the same face that she had smiled back at many years ago.

_"Mama! See-shells mama!", cried little Yetkaterina as she pattered along the wet sand, not caring if her shoes got wet. She was many years old, but had the appearance and mind of a carefree five year old._

_"Da little one. Seashells. Aren't they very pretty?"_

_"See shells mama! I see them!" the little one squeaked happily, as she darted over to a white circular shell nestled in the sand that the tide washed in. She picked it up and showed it to her mother._

_Eva examined it, and said with a knowing smile, "That's a sand cake little one. Isn't it pretty?"_

_The girl nodded, smiling with enough radiance to outshine the sun, "Da! Can I keep it mama?"_

_"Alright, but how about I hold it? I'll keep it safe."_

_Yetkaterina looked down at the shell, then her mother, "You promise? Forever and ever?"_

_"Da, I promise."_

_The little girl beamed, as the waters of the cold sea brought in small ice chunks._

_...'And I promise to keep you safe too'..._

Eva was stroking her daughter's hair as she thought. Her lilac-blue eyes were welled with tears as she stared at the ill nation in bed. For hundreds of years, she had carried the heavy job of being a mother on her shoulders, guiding her child through her whole life. She could barely imagine how Yetkaterina would go through her life without her. How would she manage? Eva was just so unsure.

But then again, these were questions she had asked herself the day she bore the country she called her daughter. How would she live without her parents? How could she have_ raised a child_ on her own?

She just tried. That was how she managed.

Now when she saw the wearied face of Yetkaterina, she didn't see her five year old daughter, she saw herself, on the day she had given birth to a nation.

And with that, she knew Kiev would continue on. She would be fine.

She slowly got up from the bedside, and taking a piece of parchment paper and ink, wrote out a letter. It was long, but not neat. She was normally a neat freak, but she couldn't handle that now. She didn't have much time.

Writing the final words, she placed it on the table, for it to be read. She then went over to the bassinet where Yetkaterina's baby slept weakly. She bent down, and with tenderness of a mother, she stroked his head.

"Now listen here my grandboy," she started softly, "You are going to be a good child for your mother, you understand, da? You grow up well, you do what she says...and...and you love her with all your heart... Alright?"

The child didn't answer, but Eva could imagine that he had listened. She stroked the pink fabric, and with a smile, went over to the bed. She knelt down, and stroked Yetkaterina's hair.

"Katyusha...my little one...you have grown up so well...you'll be an amazing mother, I know it..." she whispered.

Tears threatening to leave her eyes, she kissed her daughter's feverish cheek, cradling her, as she whispered softly, "I love you so much, my child."

After what seemed a time longer than life, she finally got up, and taking one last look at her child, smiled sadly, and left the house.

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><p>Stepping out into the snow, she felt as it tickled her skin and mussed her hair. The wind did not howl, and it was a silent snow. At least it was peaceful.<p>

As she continued walking, straight away from her house, Kievan Rus sighed under her breath, and called out, "Winter..."

She heard the crunching of snow, and she turned to see the boy standing by her right side.

"Yes'm?"

"You've gotten taller." she noted, taking a look at him. The already gangly season seemed to grow even more so.

"Yes 'm."

"I suppose you know about my daughter and the child, don't you."

"Yes 'm."

"Can you say something else besides that, boy?"

"Well would you want me to say no, and lie?"

She narrowed her eyes in annoyance. She then sighed,

"I..."

He looked at her, blank curiosity.

"I...I am trusting you to keep my daughter safe. You fathered her child, and you know what this means, don't you?"

"...That you are in capability of controlling him when he's big enough. He's much too small now...but when he grows..."

"...why did you have to go and say that? You know I won't have any control as to my moralities when I'm fully Winter..."

"Because it's the truth. He's your child. A child of Winter."

"Soon, a child of nobody. I'm barely human anymore, m'am. I can't touch anything without killing it anymore."

"Not nations."

"Of course not..."

"...but you'll still be able to control this one."

"...yes...but why are you telling me this?"

"Because I am going to warn you. And warn you clearly.", she growled, eyes flaming, " If you _ever_ hurt my child, I will make sure that you will regret it, heart turned to ice or not. And you had better be wise in being part of your son's life."

"...Are you sure he's going to live? He's so small..."

"He will. I'm making certain of it."

"Will Kiev live?"

"No."

Savva's eyes widened, as wind began to howl in his slight fearfulness, "You mean you're going to let your own daughter die?"

Kievan Rus smiled sadly, but with pride, "Of course not. She will live."

She took out something from her coat pocket, and held it in her hands. From close observation, Savva could see it was a sea shell. A sand cake to be exact.

"Yetkaterina is not Kiev anymore..." she informed Savva, smiling widely, with a bittersweetness. He stared confusedly at her, as she took a step forward.

"...She is now Kievan Rus...Mother Russia."

Savva's eyes widened in shock, and before he could protest anything, Eva fell forward, eyes closing as her breath stopped, and her consciousness disappeared.

But instead of clothing and skin hitting the cold ground, all that landed was a large mound of snowflakes, which promptly blew away. Savva stared, agape at the bare ground, and the lack of any traces of Eva Braginskaya's existance, except for the sand cake which lay nestled in the ground.

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><p><em>"Katyusha..."<em>

_"Savva?"_

_"Yes. Are you feeling better?"_

_"Surprisingly, yes. I feel less weak..."_

_"That's good to hear. Good news is the baby's alright too."_

_"Oh, it is?"_

_"He looks a lot like you, bunny."_

_"...'he'?"_

...

Fever breaking, the new Kievan Rus woke up about two hours later to the sound of her baby's first cries.

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><p><strong>So I spent a lot of time writing this chapter, about three hours on Friday, two on Saturday, and three today. I really like where it went. <strong>

**So this is going to lead up to a better explanation as to what happened.**

**Also, for those wondering, a 'sand cake' is another term for a 'sand dollar', a type of seashell. I don't think they'd have called them sand dollars back then. And a note of inaccuracy, sand dollars are more North American, and you wouldn't find one in Russia usually.**

**Read and Review or the baby becomes my midnight snack (blender time!). Thanks for your patience everyone!**


	9. Changes for Nobody

**Updated! Sorry for the longer wait. My school play was going on, so I was uber busy.**

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><p>As the darkness of sleep cleared, Katyusha felt slightly refreshed as she sat up, senses twitching as she perked at the sound of an infant's wailing. For a moment, she didn't remember anything that had occured. She had just woken up, feeling content. She blinked slowly, as her thought processes returned.<p>

Memories of the time earlier, spent agonized in the snow returned. She remembered the coldness of the weather stinging as her body shook, racked with pain, and how it seemed to ebb away as she blacked out.

She gingerly touched her stomach, trying to feel the all too familiar bulge. But now, her stomach was flatter, and smooth. It was now, she realized that the cries she heard were not imagined.

She felt herself trembling now, as she listened to the cries of the infant, noticing they were coming from the basket by the bed. She hadn't a chance to even see her own baby yet...it was her own, right?

Slowly, she moved her legs over the edge of the bed, setting them on the floor gently. She stood up, feeling uneasy and weak on her feet, she took a sigh that diminished a wave of nausea, and walked slowly towards the source of the crying. Her whole body throbbed gently with a dull pain as she walked.

She peered over the basket, and felt her heart catch in her ribcage as she saw the tiny, twitching form crying needfully, blanket twisted. Its eyes were closed shut, as its face was red with newness and heat. Katyusha felt a twinge in her throat as she saw a soft layer of dried silver-blonde on top of its soft head.

Suddenly, the little one's eyes opened for the first time, as it wailed more, revealing a unique, shocking color of violet.

Katyusha's mouth was wide open with surprise and lack of coherent thought. She breathed softly, as she could only watch the baby writhe and cry, not knowing what it wanted.

Overwhelmed, Katyusha backed away, trying to keep her eyes off the baby. But its violet eyes were almost...frightening. As far as she knew, Katyusha was certain her eyes were blue, and Savva's were gray. Violet...it was just too surreal. She couldn't see much resemblance of anything in the small life.

As she backed away, she bumped into the table, and whirled around quickly. She caught her breath, and sighed, trying to calm herself. She looked down at the table, and found a piece of paper laying on it, folded in half. Curious, she picked it up.

_Dear Yetkaterina,_

_You should be very proud of yourself. You're now mother to a lovely little boy. He'll grow up handsomely, I know it. You'll be fine, taking care of him. When you were born, I wasn't sure what to do...but I got through everything just fine. You grew up so well, and I hope you'll continue to grow up even greater._

_Now, Yetkaterina, I need you to do me a favor, and do as I ask...one last time._

_As soon as you can, take what you can carry, and leave the house. Don't go back. Once other nations learn of your new nation, then they'll come attack you. Find a safe place to hide, until your son is old enough to stand on his own. Then you'll be less vulnerable._

_This is the last thing I'll say to you, now. If you are ever caught by an enemy nation, and they ask who you are, do not tell them you are Kiev. You would be lying._

_You will look them in the eye, and say, "I am Kievan Rus; Mother Russia!"_

Katyusha crinkled the paper absentmindedly in her hand, as she gasped, with a bit of a panic. Did her mother...? She continued reading, fearfully.

_I am passing my title onto you, as I myself pass my spirit over to whatever higher beings wish to claim it. You now have the strength to live for many years to come. You'll live far longer than the time to see your son grow into a powerful nation. Thousands of years maybe._

_Do not try to stop me. I don't think you can, since by the time you've read this, there is no trace of me left._

Katyusha shook as a groan of fear and denial uttered through her throat. Her eyes burned, chest constricting, as she tried to reassure herself that her mother was still alive.

_Do not be sad. I want you to carry on, and be a strong nation, and a good mother. Understood, no questions asked, alright?_

_Yetkaterina, I love you more than the title I carried. Which is why you will carry it. So I will always be with you. My dear little child, if the stars grow cold, I will be there to keep you warm. Goodbye._

Kievan Rus wailed, dropping to her knees, as she read the last part of the letter. The paper sailed to the floor, folding over, leaving the final part open to view.

_Signed, Your loving Mama_

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><p>Yetkaterina shrieked with sobbing on the floor, not caring if anyone heard her. Her mother was dead...dead and gone. For hundreds of years, she was the one she woke up to seeing every morning, to hear her voice, to smell the honey-scent of her shawls, to feel the warmth of her hugs. And now it was all gone.<p>

The letter wasn't even a warning. Eva had mentioned that one day, she'd leave, but Katyusha never thought she'd leave now.

Her mother was one of the only people she really knew in the world. And now there was one left...who wasn't even there.

_Savva._

She got up and ran outside, into the cold snow, which was beginning to violently howl, "Savva!" she cried, tears warm on her cooling face. She _had_ to talk to him. She had to know he was there.

Nothing. Just the bitter wind. It whipped at her hair, and rippled her stained skirt as she choked on a breath, and cried out again, "Savva!"

The winds didn't cease. Katyusha grew hysterical, as she felt tears flowing even more. She sobbed, "Savva where are you?"

Finally, she heard something uttering on the wind. It was not an actual voice, but it was familiar...and it grew a human quality.

_My rabbit..._, it uttered, _I'm so sorry..._

And the familiar tones faded away, as Katyusha cried helplessly.

She would never see Savva again.

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><p>Yetkaterina, in a daze, walked back into the house. Numb from the cold, and emotion, she sat on the edge of the bed. Savva was gone too. What did she have left?<p>

Up until now, she had ignored the crying of the newborn. It was the only other living thing she would really get introduced to, it seemed. She stood up from the bed, and slowly, and deliberately walked over towards the basket. She stared blankly at the child that cried for unknown needs.

As she continued to stare, Yetkaterina realized that this baby was an absolute stranger to her. She didn't know it or recognize it at all. And for the rest of her life she would be stuck with it.

_"You...you little demon...",_ she hissed under her breath at the wailing infant. With both hands, she clutched the infant around the middle, snatching it up. It screamed in it's wailing, and shock from the brutal handling.

"You monster! I'll never see my family again, because of you!"

She panted angrily, as she held the baby up in front of her tightly. It's head was going to fall back, and it would get hurt, but she didn't care. This parasite just destroyed her life, and while everyone she knew was gone, a stranger, completely new, introduced itself to stay with her forever.

She had to get rid of it. She couldn't live with this thing.

She held it, cradled for sake of transporting it better, and marched outside.

What could she do? She had to get rid of it somehow...

A manic idea popped into the teen nation's head, as she grinned near hysterically, looking down at the baby's crying face. She walked a distance, until she could spot the riverbank.

_Never...I'll have to never deal with you again..._

She stared at the river, noting the frozen icy lane it left in winter's raging storm. She couldn't drown the child if it was icy. Could she just leave it in the snow, and let it freeze? No, it was concieved by Winter...

The thickness of the ice pierced the thoughts in the delerious Kievan Rus' head. The ice was thick. Meaning it could crush something. If she dropped the child on the ice, it would surley die, its head soft and new.

As the child continued bawling for needs, Katyusha's arms shook, as she hesitantly lifted the bundle over her head, intending to slam it into the frozen river.

But as her arms struck out over her head, child facing the sky...she just realized...

She couldn't.

She couldn't kill this baby. Her mother would hate her, Savva would hate her, and she'd hate herself.

Her mother had trusted her to take care of this child, and she was already failing. And she couldn't even imagine what Savva was thinking. This was his baby too. And if she killed it, what would that say?

She slowly lowered her arms back down, shaking, as she stared at the little boy. At this moment, she began to notice the little details in this child. Its small body, the pale fair hair...now that she thought of it, it reminded her of Savva's...or her mothers. A round little nose, that looked like it was cute enough to pinch. It's purple eyes were so soft...they were almost like lilac with their newness. Just like Mama...

Before Katyusha knew it, she was sobbing along with the child, clasping it close to her, keeping it warm. She screamed out her guilt and begging of forgiveness, the cries being drowned out by the wind. Hopefully those it was meant for, heard it.

* * *

><p>Katyusha was still shaking when she got home, sat up in bed, holding her son. She couldn't believe what she had almost done. She had nearly killed her baby. What kind of mother was she?<p>

_Mama, I'm so sorry!_

She hesitantly let one of her fingers stroke her baby's soft hair. It was still crying, fussy now. Would it ever quiet down?

Katyusha sighed, as she realized that it was most likely hungry. And from the many talks her mother had given her these last few months, she knew babies needed milk, and where. She looked down at her breasts, that seemed bigger than ever.

She wanted to whine to herself, _Do I really have to?_ as she hesitantly unbuttoned her dress front, revealing one of the pale white mounds. Slowly, praying that it was going to be over soon, she nudged the baby's head towards her chest.

At first, it didn't do anything. It just continued fussing and crying. Katyusha gently nudged its head.

"Come on. Eat. You've been bothering me about it, so eat now."

As if on cue, the baby's peach colored mouth opened up, and began to suckle, quieting down. The experience felt very strange, and rather ticklish, but Katyusha realized how much she'd probably be doing this, so she coped.

She sighed as she put a hand behind the baby's head, supporting it.

_Mama, what would you do now?_

* * *

><p>"...K-katyusha." started Russia with an uncertain tone, catching her attention. She had been staring at the floor this whole time. She looked up, to see a wide smile on the other nation's face.<p>

And that's what frightened her. It wasn't a jolly happy smile. It was a smile that looked like it was going to lead to Russia bursting into tears, or breaking.

"Katyusha..._sestra_..." he said very sing-songy, "Stop lying...please."

"...I-Ivan, I'm not lying. This is the truth...I am your mother."

"No..." he retorted, still smiling shakily, "You're lying. You can't be my mother."

"Ivan, I'm telling the truth! Believe me!"

"...You can't be my mother Katyusha. No mother of mine would try to kill me."

"I never tried to-"

"Then what did you just tell me about you trying to _drown_ me in the river? Is that another lie?" his smiled dropped, leaving a face of anger.

"No! No...Ivan, I-...I just...I didn't know what to do...and...my mother..."

"You mean the one you let me believe was _mine_?" he glared, purple eyes flaming.

"I...I just wanted you to live a better life...so then you wouldn't have to know about Winter..."

"Oh, I already knew enough about Winter! You'd think telling me at some point would have alleviated something?"

"Ivan..." she whispered, "I just..."

"You _lied_ to me..." he choked, "All my life I've been lied to!" he shouted angrily, gripping his armchair. He stared at the ground a moment.

"Who else?"

"...What?"

"Who _else_ knows about this?"

Katyusha quivered, "...C-China. That's why he refused to date you..."

Ivan's eyes widened in shock, and filled with a deeper emotion of hurt. He flew up out of his chair, and began to leave the room. Katyusha feebily got up to go after him.

"Ivan wait!"

"N-no! You lied to me! I don't care if you're my sister, mother, or whatever else you are, I'm getting out of here!"

And before the teary eyed Ukraine could make a protest, the emotionally ravaged Russian let the door slam behind him, leaving Katyusha in the house alone.

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><p><strong>Aaand, now we're at a cliffhanger! So as you can tell, Russia accepted it better than Ukraine thought.<strong>

**And I feel odd after writing that scene at the river. Jesus _Christ,_ That's dark.**

**Read and Review or Russia chucks a television through the window, and it kills the author of this fic.**


	10. Promise from Nobody

**The flashback is in Yao's point of view. Just saying.**

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><p>China was napping on a couch in his home when he heard a loud, frantic rapping at his large metal door. He muttered groggily as he stood up, wondering who on earth would be at his door today. It couldn't be the package services, they were closed today...He slipped on a pair of tan house slippers as he walked to the door and opened it, revealing Russia. The large nation seemed very upset, and was glaring.<p>

Immediately, China gulped, not liking the look on Russia's face, and he started nervously, "Oh, um...hello Russia. How can I help you?"

Russia continued to glare, not a single word. He let out a steamed breath through his nose.

"Russia...can I help...you?" he uttered, backing up slightly. But as he backed up, Russia quickly filled in those steps, ending up under the doorframe.

"R-russia, what's going on?"

Russia ducked his face closer, and hissed angrily, "Why? ...Why did you never tell me?"

"Tell you what aru?"

"Tell me about Ukraine!" he growled, looking ready to lunge at the Chinese man. He took a menacing step forward, causing the other to fearfully shrink back.

"What about Ukraine?" asked Yao forgetfully in his panic.

"You knew she wasn't my sister, didn't you?"

Yao's gold eyes widened, and his face paled. The secret must have slipped somehow. As he whispered with suspended breath, "Oh goodness...y-you found out?"

Ivan's glare sharpened, "I didn't just find out. She told me she was my mother. And she told me that you knew it too. And judging by your reaction, you do, da?"

"Yes, but I...I just knew about it! I didn't see any reason why I had to tell you!" piped Yao, panicked. Ivan was mere inches away from him now, angry aura surrounding him. His lips were curled into a snarl, as he stared into the delicate, panicked face of the older nation. Yao stared into his eyes, which were raging purple storm clouds. He swore he could see lightning crack in them. He was so fixed on them, that he realized too late that Ivan's large hands swooped in, and clutched him mercilessly by the shoulders, lifting him off the ground.

"YOU'VE BOTH BEEN LYING TO ME!" roared Ivan, irate beyond explanation. Yao kicked the air, trying to get free, but soon felt his back pressed brutely against the wall.

"WHY DID YOU LET THIS HAPPEN? WHY DID YOU LIE TO ME YAO?"

The Chinese man shook in fear and loss, as he tried to open his mouth and speak. But no words were coming out. And so Ivan knocked him against the wall again, pain smarting in his left shoulder.

"WHY?"

The raging violet storms were then frozen in place, as the Russian breathed heavily. They melted, leaving a surprising light of despair. He let Yao go, and covered his hand with his face as he continued to breath audibly, and painfully. His chest hurt so much.

"...why?...", he finally uttered.

Yao rubbed his aching shoulder, as he looked down to the floor shamefully, hesitating to open his mouth. He knew this was going to be difficult to say, but since Russia already knew Ukraine was his mother, he'd have to explain the story.

He sighed, and rasped quietly, "We should probably sit down...then I maybe I can tell you what happened..."

* * *

><p>Yao had been nursing the bruise on the left corner of his lip for the third time that morning. He cursed to himself as he stared in the mirror again. This one was going to stay for a long time. Maybe not as long as the mark the broken nose left, but close to that. He was glad Mongolia was out for the day, so he was relieved of any problems for a while.<p>

He slid open the flat wood door to the outside, to let in air. The winter was cold, but at least it was refreshing. He didn't know just how long he could have lasted with such humid air inside. His clothes were not always comfortable when he wore them in humidity or stuffiness. He could feel relief as the cold air sailed under his clothes, cooling him off.

He decided to walk outside for a little, and slipping on his shoes, stepped off the wood floor of his house, and down the stone steps. He brushed his feet in the moist dirt as he walked, feeling slightly at peace as he strolled. He felt like he could ignore the fact his whole body was sore tired, and how his hair was a mess, and how he was still in a dangerous position. Mongolia was threatening his safety, and he didn't know what else to do.

As he strolled into the bamboo grove, he swore he could hear something rattling through the stalks. At first, he thought nothing, believing it was just a little wind. But as he walked deeper into the grove, he heard the sound again. It sounded like something was crashing frantically through the thick bamboo groupings, thrashing violently. Yao grew curious, and somewhat concerned. It could be anything making that noise, friend or foe. His biggest guesses were a panda caught in some hunting trap or someone crashing through the bamboo. He started walking slowly, as he got closer and closer.

All of a sudden, a blur of cloth and hair burst through a natural fence of the plants, awful snapping and crashing sounds crunching through the air. A frightened scream as the unknown person fell, knees first. As they fell onto their side, curling over with a cry, Yao could instantly tell it was a girl. She was clothed very heavily, with a winter shawl and dress, a cloth covering her hair, keeping her ears warm. She was dirtied, and was carrying a large burlap bag with her, on her back. It was so hulking and massive, that Yao couldn't imagine what on earth she was carrying or how much. In her arms, was a small child, looking only about several months old, held firmly, and protected from the fall. Its clothes were hastily sewn together. It was vocalizing its own confused fear, from being so close to the ground.

Yao walked over quickly, eyes wide, asking, "Aiyah, are you alright? You just fe-"

The girl looked up panicked, and screamed, scrambling to back away and flee. Her eyes were circled with fatigue and fear, her hair messy underneath the cloth. She repositioned her hands close to her chest, as if to protect the little one. There was something familiar about this girl, that Yao was trying to remember. The face, he knew. The clothes, maybe. The child, no. But he took another look as the girl scrabbled helplessly, giving a shriek, and he saw the vivid orb dangling out of the bag. The red lantern. The one he gave away and was punished for.

He asked gently, "Katyusha? Is that you?"

Katyusha's looked up quickly, eyes wide, as she stared in surprise. She stared at the bruised face, and noticed the golden eyes. She knew them. From that day. The silk clothes, and the eyes made her remember. The peddler boy, who gave her the lantern.

"Yao?"

The other smiled, bruise by his lip stretching, "I knew I recognize you, pretty girl! I never expect to see you near my house, aru!"

"I-I'm...?"

"Oh my, you really worn out, poor thing! You really come all the way from Kievan Rus?"

Katyusha nodded slowly, taking Yao's offered hand to pull her up, shakily standing.

"Speaking of which, how your mother?"

Katyusha shuddered with her next breath, and began to cry. Yao's eyes grew with shock, and he felt his heart skip a beat. Did something happen to Kievan Rus?

"Oh no, don't cry! Tell me what happen?" he asked nervously, trying to comfort her, as he put his hand on her shoulder.

She took in another shaky breath as she cried, "I-I'm Kievan Rus now. M-my mother's gone."

Yao's eyes shone with sadness as he then said, "I'm so sorry...", and gently hugged the crying girl.

"She gave up her title so Moskva and I could live..."

"Is Moskva little one? Is he your brother?"

Katyusha, tears rolling, bit her lip as she then said nervously, slightly embarrassed, "Y-yes, but...he's mine."

Yao's eyebrows raised as he looked at the little one, crying in Katyusha's arms, not liking the cold. This was her baby? He didn't realize that Kiev could have had a child so soon, and he had no clue as to when. Or where? Who was the father?

Not bothering to ask anything on that topic, Yao stared at the baby more, and then cooed with a happy smile, "Aiyaa, he so adorable, aru! Is Moskva his nation name?"

"Yes...I decided his other name should be Ivan. It sounded cute, and it suited him."

Yao nodded, fixated on the little one's teary purple eyes. His little cheeks and round nose were red from cold weather and his endless fuss.

Katyusha then smiled through her tears a little, "But I sometimes call him 'Cryvan'. He won't stop for hours."

Yao smiled sympathetically, and then asked, "Can I hold him?"

Katyusha sighed, and nodding, handed the wriggling infant to the other. Yao's golden eyes sparkled as he smiled at the baby. He gently poked its tummy with his hand, and said to its crying face, "Don't cry, it's ok! Smile!"

Ivan cried louder as soon as he realized he was out of his mother's safe arms, eyes screwed shut, blocking his newly developed tear ducts from making any more moist trails. As he heard the voice though, he opened his little eyes, and found himself staring at one of the prettiest people he had ever seen. Their eyes were nice and shiny, making him vocalize his awe with a coo, smiling as he reached a chubby arm up. Their clothes felt nice and smooth, and thus he snuggled in further. He didn't know what the purple on their face was, but he didn't mind. They looked nice.

Yao stroked Ivan's soft head gently, and looked back up at Katyusha. He gave a look of sympathy as he saw the tears still in her eyes, tired and worn. He couldn't imagine how many days she had been gone, and how many without food.

"Would you like to stay in my house for a little to warm up? I make tea."

The girl shook slightly, and after a moment nodded yes, face unsure. Yao's face turned to seriousness once again as he realized that they'd still be in danger. If Mongolia realized she was a country...

* * *

><p>"...And then after he was gone, I was stuck taking care of Ivan alone for the rest of this time." finished Katyusha with a sigh. She already had finished three cups of tea, and was shakily reaching for the tea pot once more. She had never felt so hungry and thirsty in all of her life. Ivan sat in her free arm, teething on one of the soft sweet dumplings Yao had placed on the table, happily oblivious to the tense emotions. The door to the secret tea room was locked, so in case anyone tried to get in, they couldn't. China didn't want Mongolia to see Kievan Rus or Moskva, knowing that he could very well threaten them.<p>

"I managed to keep the both of us safe for a while, but then things were starting to get really bad. People were getting suspicious over where my mother was. Some thought I had killed her or something; where they got that idea, I'll never know. So I decided to tell them that my mother died in childbirth and Ivan was my little brother, just to keep them away. Some believed me, but some didn't, or they thought the baby was cursed, since the father was unknown to them. They started stalking us every day, and one day, they threw a rock through the window. I knew we had to leave, so I packed up whatever I could, and I just ran. A-and, when someone went after me, I just hid. And I finally ended up here after a while. Before I ran into you, some creepy guy was following me, asking who I was, and if I would go with him. I screamed and ran faster. I-I just got really scared that something might happen to me or Ivan. He's already gotten a bad cold twice while we were on the road."

Yao's eyes were wide with shock, and slight horror, as he tried to process the hardships his friend was going through, just to keep herself and her child alive.

"So he a Winter baby?"

The girl sighed tiredly, and rasped, "Yes. But I honestly don't see any significance to him. Other than the purple eyes, and the crying, he seems like a normal baby. "

"Katyusha, baby always cry, it normal, aru. But you've got a point about purple eyes. Very unusual. And wasn't his father's eyes gray?"

"That's what confuses me. My mother had lilac eyes, but these are different. Dark purple isn't very common. But it does kind of remind me of Mama."

"That what I thought too.", nodded Yao, "So you really Kievan Rus now?"

"Yes. But I don't think anyone besides you knows about it now."

"Alright. I think we should keep it that way."

"Hm? How come."

Yao bit his lip, "At the moment, Mongolia really bad. He going around invading all the huge countries. I think he might go after Kievan Rus.

Ivan made an audible gurgle as he tried to open his mouth wide enough to fit the spit-soggy dumpling inside. Katyusha gently tapped his hand, signaling for him to stop. The violet eyed child sighed, and silently went back to work on gumming at the pastry. Yao dropped his worried look a moment to smile in adoration at the baby (he still thought he was so cute!), and then looked back up.

"And I think he know you a country. It not looking very good right now."

Katyusha looked down worriedly, as she fearfully reimaged the hawk-like eyes of the savage nation.

"I don't think he know you Kievan Rus, but he knows you a nation. I'd be very careful."

"I-is he near here?"

"...he live here...which is why I can't have you stay in here for much longer. If he knew you Kievan Rus, he could kill you and steal your baby. Mother nations are in danger if they are targeted for land."

"I-I can't let that happen. I promised my mama I'd keep my son safe, and I can't let Mongolia hurt him. I-if I die, he might die too."

"And that why nobody can know your his mother. I suggest that you hide, and keep going. Mongolia is conquering different spots. If you hide somewhere where he is not going, you'll be safe for a while."

"What if he finds me? Is there anyway to keep myself from getting killed or Ivan getting held captive?"

"Killed, you probably can. I don't think Mongolia even know you're Kievan Rus, aru. But captive...I don't think there much you can do. He rule over you then, but at least you be alive."

"W-wait...so he doesn't even know my mother's gone?"

"Nope. He still looking around."

"...I just had an idea. It might work."

"What?" asked Yao curiously.

"I-if I was ever caught by Mongolia, I could tell him that my mother was alive, and traveling somewhere else. I-I could say that...Ivan was my little brother. That I was Kiev, and Moskva was my sibling. T-then maybe he'd be more interested in finding her than capturing us?"

Yao tilted his head in thought, "It could work, but he might still want to capture you, for sake of it. But you still be alive."

"As long as we're alive and healthy, I'll accept it." sighed Kievan Rus, as she kissed her baby's head.

"There would have to be one more thing though", added China, "Moskva can't know your his mother. If he know you not his sister, then he could let it loose. He very young, and won't know much for a while."

Katyusha silently looked down, heart starting to droop. She'd have to decieve Ivan about his family? She didn't want to. She had just become content with her role of being a mother, and now she'd have to give it away? As she stared at her baby's content face, she remembered what her mother said about being proud of who she was. But she couldn't now. If she did that, she and Ivan were as good as dead. She'd hopefully understand.

Sighing, knowing she might regret this, Katyusha nodded, and said, "Whatever to keep us alive."

Yao smiled with a bit of wistfulness, as he then said, "He almost look like your brother anyway. Nobody would ever know."

"And let's keep it that way. Never let anyone know. Promise?"

"Promise kept, aru."

Soon enough, Katyusha said goodbye to Yao, grateful for his hospitality. She looked down at her baby, and spoke with a bittersweetness,

"Now little one, you're going to call me sestra."

Ivan began to gurgle gibberish words, "Aaaama."

"Sestra."

"aamama..." cooed the infant, confused as he reached for the warmth he defined as a mother.

"No..." she corrected, feeling pained from having to reject her child's first developing words, "_Sestra_."

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><p>Ivan sat there, not looking at anything, as Yao finished the story.<p>

"...She...she did it to keep you safe, aru."

Blank stare, Ivan got up, silently, and not acknowledging Yao, left the house, closing the door shut.

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><p><strong>I really enjoyed writing baby!Ivan. Just saying again. He's as sweet as unicorn puke.<strong>

**Read and Review or Mongolia finds Katyusha and makes her his personal toast maker. Because all conquerors need toast.**

**Sestra means sister in Russian.**


	11. Understanding of Nobody

**Next update!**

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><p>The bar was surprisingly not very crowded that evening. America entered the venue, with a tired sigh as he poked his head in. He had been to this place a few times, all for the same reason. He stepped in, and walked up to the counter, and got the attention of the bartender.<p>

"Oh, hey Al. Yeah, he's still here. He's slumped over on that table over there."

Alfred sighed, and rubbed the bridge of his nose, "Thanks Vlad. Sorry once again."

"Yeah, just let your friend know that he can down shot after shot as he pleases, but when he's at 45 shots of Smirnoff and straight, loyal customer or not, he's not getting any more. I'm not calling the cops if he ends up dead."

"Yeah, sure." smirked the nation, as he walked over to the table, where the large nation was heaped halfway on it in a drunken stupor. Multiple stacks of empty shot glasses lay on the table, as well as on the floor. A bottle of vodka lay somewhere halfway spilt, puddle under the table. The Russian's shaking hand held a shot glass that was halfway full.

America sighed with a half grimace, pitying the state of the large nation right now. He knew that Russia was never like this unless something really bad happened. The last time this happened, it had been three years ago, when during a party, Prussia, who was horribly drunk, publicly humiliated him through ridicule, which left the large nation in tears. He ended up ditching the party, where America found him at this bar, nearly curled under the table. He was still crying as he shakily lifted the fifth bottle of vodka to his lips. He had forced the reluctant ex-nation to apologize to his old enemy, shoving him into the bar with Ivan. Gilbert had tried to make a break for it, but Alfred and Arthur held him down until he uttered the words, "I'm sorry." Ivan mumbled into his knees that it was alright, requesting that America let Gilbert go, but Alfred knew it wasn't. Nothing for Ivan was ever going to be alright, especially since his perception of life and emotion was so fragmented.

America slowly walked over to Ivan, and slowly and ever so gently tapped his head, "Wakey-wakey Ivan."

The drunk nation snuffled in his state, and shifted his head up blearily. His eyes were glazed, with weary bags under them. A small trail of saliva had trickled from the corner of his mouth, leaving a little puddle on the table. He groaned, "Uuuunh...Fruh-fredka?"

"Hey Ruskie. How you doin'?"

Ivan rolled his head to the side, dazily muttering, "uuuy, go'way. 'wanna stay here."

"Aw, c'mon big guy, why don't we get you home and into bed, huh?"

"N-noooo." he grumbled, slamming his head back onto the table. He shut his eyes, as if he wanted to close everything out of his mind.

"Your bed is definitely much comfier than a bar table, I know." smirked Alfred, who patted the Russian's back, "Now why don't we get up, so you can go home?"

"I don't wanna go home." slurred Russia adamantly. He let one of his arms droop off of the table, and he shut his eyes sleepily. America sighed, pitying how the usually tall-set nation was the spitting image of a drunkard. He held his lip tight, and with no hesitation, looped his arms under the other's armpits, to hoist him up. He wasn't very afraid of the possibility that Russia might fight back, since at the moment, he was a deadweight, and drunk into uselessness. As he lifted Russia up, the larger nation grunted in disapproval, and he muttered, "Nyetttt, lemme stay. I don't wanna go hoooome..."

"Well too bad, man. I'm not letting you stay at the bar. Now c'mon, my car's low on gas, I gotta fill up my tank, I-"

"Fredka, let me go!" squealed the Russian, squirming listlessly, to get out of his grasp. Unfortunately, in his subdued state, the American had the upper strength, and pulled him farther from his table, towards the front door of the bar. Russia struggled again, "I don't wanna go home!"

"Russia c'mon, I haven't got all night!" huffed America, as he tugged again.

"I don't want to go home!" shouted the Russian murderously, as he flailed, getting pulled out to the front of the venue, and to the parking lot edge. He nearly slipped out of the other's grasp, but a good tug on his scarf kept him restrained. He dove for the American's legs, trying to trip him, so he could escape.

"Russia!" cried America, as he kicked the nation back, "Stoppit!"

"Let me go!" he roared, "I'm not going home!"

"Russia!" he snarled, as he yanked the man up, "Russia, what's going on? This totally isn't like you!"

_Not like me. What is there about me?_

And Ivan broke. He just couldn't take it. He felt his chest constrict as his eyes burned. His lip shook, as he tried to speak, only to feel his eyes overflow. America's eyes went wide with shock.

_Don't cry Ivan, damn it don't cry, not in front of America._ cursed the Russian to himself. He quickly tried to think of the things that made him happy; sunflowers, vodka, puppies, fancy addressed envelopes for him, _Katyusha_...

And the tears continued, as he broke further. He could feel his throat hitch, and the desire to stop crying melted as he felt the fleece collar of America's bomber jacket cushion his cheek. The American hugged him, patting his back as if he was a lost, scared child, and whispered flabbergastedly, "Oh man, Ivan...s'ok, s'ok..."

Ivan just continued to cry, feeling the comfort of Alfred seep into him, making the tears roll even more, dripping off his pudgy face. He just didn't know what to do anymore.

"Shit..." whispered America under his breath, realizing that this must be bad if Russia was full out breaking down, "Russia, what happened?"

"I..." he started, hiccuping slightly, "I just don't know who I am anymore..."

America tilted his head in utter confusion, having no clue as to what he was talking about. He_ did_ know, however, that he was stuck comforting a crying 6'5 man in a public parking lot. For both their sakes, he decided to gently prod Ivan to his car.

As he opened the passenger door for the other, he smiled caringly, "We can talk in here, 'kay?"

"I..." he opened his mouth to say something, but all that came out was a hiccup, and a small squeak. Alfred sighed, feeling _really_ sorry for Ivan now.

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><p>Alfred's old station wagon had a bench seat, making it easy for him to reach over to the disheveled man next to him. Within a few minutes, he was staring face to face with him, noting his red face, factoring from both tears and alcohol. At first, he had been so certain that something really terrible had happened, but as soon as Ivan spoke again, he was certain that the man was overreacting.<p>

"I've been lied to."

"What?" replied the confused American, head tilting.

"I've been lied to, my whole life has been a lie."

"Excuse me? Ruskie, what are you talking about?"

"I thought I could trust her..." monologued the Russian, leaning his head despondently against the seat, "I thought I could believe her with anything..."

"Who? Who the heck are you talking about man?" asked Alfred in exasperation, left in the dark about the other's troubles.

"Katyusha. She's lied to me my whole life."

"Your sister? What does she have to do with this? What's the matter?" asked Alfred, eyes wide with curiosity and frustration.

"S-she's not my sister Fredka."

"What? How could she not be your sister?" frowned Alfred, not understanding where Ivan was going.

"She's not my sister. She never has been. I have learned of this, only today."

"Wait...what are you-"

"She's my _mother_." he choked, eyes teary.

Alfred's face went blank for a moment, as he processed what he was just told.

"She bore me as her son, but raised me as her brother..."

Alfred was not responding, as his eyes widened into a look of absolute shock.

"...so...she's your mom?" asked Alfred in disbelief. Ivan could only nod, shamefully looking down. The sandy haired man's blue eyes grew wider with a horrific realization as he whispered loudly under his breath,

"Holy _shit_...you mean...you mean...all the time...I've been cracking sex jokes about your _mom_?...O-oh man...fuck...w-why didn't you tell me-"

"Because I just learned of this today!" growled Ivan, frustrated, "She has been lying to me for centuries, letting me believe my mother was _dead_. I have been living along the path of a lie, don't you see? I'm a lie lived out!"

Calming down from the horror of his own misdeeds, Alfred tried to reassure him, "Hey man, I-"

"An identity I was forced to live with! I'm not who I am supposed to be!" he roared.

He heaved angrily, as his breaths began to calm down. He held his head in his hands as he shook slightly.

"I-I don't know who I am anymore..."

Alfred could only watch as the Russian despaired, and tried to think of something to say. He had never seen someone so lost like this. And at the moment, he didn't blame him. Ukraine had raised him as her little brother ever since he was young. He remembered how Ivan told him that his mother supposedly died when he was born, and thus Ukraine was the one to care for him all his life. But it was with that fact that Alfred realized there couldn't be much of a difference in those two identities. Ukraine raised him as a baby and growing on up, making sure he was growing well. Mothers did the same thing.

"...Y...y'know...Ukraine...she um...she took care of you all your life, right?"

"...da..." he answered blankly, not looking at anything.

"And she raised you as a baby...even when she called you her brother, right?"

"...da...?" answered Russia with a slight inquisitive tone, wondering where the American was going with this.

"And from what I know, man...moms do the same thing."

"Well what of it?"

"Well, even if you knew Ukraine was your mother...things wouldn't be much different...would they?...Except for the fact you calling her "mother" or something?"

Russia shuffled uncomfortably. America had a point. Ukraine was the only parental figure he had really ever known. She had raised him, clothed him, and fed him. Even if he knew she was his mother, things couldn't really be that much different could they? Although, he might have reconsidered some pains he would have inadvertently caused Ukraine like the Holodomor, or the handling of Chernobyl, seeing it from a different viewpoint if she was acknowledged as the one who bore him into the world. But even so, he'd still be Russia.

"Da...I guess so..."

Ivan curled his knees in as he continued to think. A feeling of dread dropped into his stomach as he remembered what Katyusha had also told him, revealing one of the most horrific secrets she had ever kept from him.

"A-Alfred..." he shivered, feeling an intense need to be held closely, safe and secure. An arm wrapped around his shoulder would have to suffice.

"What?"

"S-she tried to kill me."

"What?" he asked again, trying to process what the other had just gasped.

"Katyusha! She tried to kill me!"

"What? When?" exclaimed the American in disbelief.

"W-when I was born! Sh-she..." he breathed, "She initially tried to throw me onto the ice, so she wouldn't have to deal with me!"

Alfred was struck speechless, and could only watch the Russian's purple eyes glisten in fear and horror, as he exclaimed,

"What kind of mother _does_ that, Fredka?"

Alfred didn't know how to respond. If he gave the possible explanation of post-partum depression, that might have upset Ivan even more. And responding with "probably not a good one" would have made him burst into tears.

"I-I don't know man...b-but..."

Ivan looked up to listen, eyes curious with a twinge of fear.

"...she didn't kill you...so she must have made the right decision in the end..."

There was a long bout of silence, before Alfred dared to say, "And she ended up raising a pretty awesome kid. So she must have been a good mother somewhere along the line..."

Ivan took in the words silently, before he bit his lip, and mumbled, "M-maybe..."

"We all make stupid mistakes in our life, man. Thank God she didn't make _that_ one, eh?"

Ivan looked up again, and the corners of his mouth turned up the smallest bit, "...Y-yeah...I guess that's true."

He frowned again as he lamented, "I just don't know if I can forgive her..."

Alfred knew _just_ how to respond to this, especially since the people in question were Russia and Ukraine, "Dude, I'd definitely say at some point, that you should. I mean, she's had to put up with your Soviet shit and-"

"Get on with it." grumbled the Russian, not liking the example.

"...Well anyway, if she's been willing to forgive you for everything that you have or haven't done to her, then you could at least return the favor to her, _someday_..."

And Ivan sighed, knowing Alfred had a point. Katyusha had to suffer through so much, just to help him get his dreams flying, and didn't even falter in strength when they crashed to the ground. She had given up so much for him, her _son_. And he was angry at her for protecting him...or what she believed was protecting him. She only lied because she believed she was doing the right thing. She had accepted him when he became monstrous and cruel, and he had been threatening to disconnect from her, because she had wanted the best for him.

Ivan sighed in shame and despair as he curled up tighter on the bench seat. He felt so tired, his head hurting from alcohol and emotion. He knew it was too late to deal with it tonight, the morning would be better. He yawned as he felt his head tilt towards the warmth of Alfred's jacket.

Alfred smirked, "If it'll make you feel better, you can sleep in my car tonight. Just don't wet the bed or anything."

The Russian chuckled halfheartedly, as he felt his eyelids grow heavy, "Don't worry. I haven't since the 12th century."

"Good." yawned the American, who leaned up against the other. He needed some sleep too. Ivan slumped there silently, as he tried his best to sleep, when out of the blue, he decided to ask America innocently,

"Did you ever know your mother, Amerika?"

Alfred shook his head, "I didn't. The stuff I really remember is after England found me. I didn't actually recognize anyone as my mom really. I think there was this one pretty lady who would look over me, but I don't think I was her kid. She stopped coming around a little before England came. I really don't know man, sorry."

"Think nothing of it, I was just curious." eased off Ivan, who shifted slightly, to become more comfortable.

"Yeah, not much you can remember from when you're a baby."

"Da, I guess not." yawned the Russian once again, sleep undeniable now. Alfred kissed the top of his head, and lay over to sleep as well.

And yet, even if it was fitfully and discomforting, Alfred's words seemed to have a feathering release of weight on his tensions. He could worry in the morning, as he thought before.

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><p>Ukraine gazed sadly at the dark circles under her eyes. She hadn't slept all night, but she knew they just weren't from tiredness. She unscrewed the pill bottle, and popped in the daily prescription, swallowing it dryly. Stiffly walking to her couch, she slumped on it despondently.<p>

From all she knew, she was a failure. She had failed to raise her child the way she had promised herself to, and she only could assume that her chance of having them as her own for the rest of her years was gone too. Russia hated her now. He didn't see her as anything but a lecherous liar now.

She had left his house about an hour after he had left in a rampage. She had no idea where he went, but all she knew was that he would not be returning home for a long time. She knew waiting at his house would only make him angrier, and so she left his house crying, not bothering to answer her 'sister's' question as to if she was alright, as Belarus approached her brother's home for the eightieth time that week. She could only imagine what terrors and pains her son was experiencing now, disheveled and hurt.

Her anticipation turned to dread in her stomach as she heard a soft knock on her door. She hesitantly got up, and walked to the door. She held her jaw tight as she gripped the doorhandle, and twisted.

Facing her was not a raging, hurt Russia, but rather a clear faced, worried Ivan. His eyes showed turmoil, but his face showed warm concern.

"Are you alright?" he asked quietly, noting her weary face. She was shaking from fatigue and nervousness as well. She swallowed hard, and nervously, she nodded. She looked down at the floor, and tried to show interest in its lovely beige shag carpet.

"Ukraine, I need to talk to you."

"Russia, I know you're angry but I-"

"I'm not angry, I just want to talk..." he gently interrupted, glancing as if he were asking permission to enter her house.

She hesitantly stepped to the side, allowing him entrance to her house. As he entered, he gently closed the door, not slamming it like his own the day before. And things were silent for a moment. As Katyusha stared at the ground, Ivan stared at her, eyes wide. This was mother and son, together for the first time since the day she called him 'brother'.

Ivan stared pitifully at Katyusha, who looked like the victim of some spirit. Her face was sunken and tired, and her entire frame was shaking. Her blue eyes showed guilt, and fear. Perhaps fear of losing the one she cared about. And this was all his fault.

Sick of hurting her like this, Ivan felt his eyes tear up again. But he didn't care. He loved Katyusha, for what she was, not her title.

Not hesitating any longer, he threw his arms around her into a hug, surprising her. He held her tightly, chin on her shoulder, as he let his tears fall. He murmured, "I'm so sorry...I'm so sorry..."

Katyusha, her own tears starting up, smiled with a slight choke, and hugged back, "I-I know. I'm sorry too. So sorry for everything..."

"Don't be sorry for that. I _owe_ you everything..." he replied, holding her tighter.

And Katyusha felt a sense of peace, knowing he forgave her. Ivan sobbed quietly, as he continued murmuring apologies.

"I'm so sorry..._mama_."

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><p><strong>Ivan accepts Katyusha as his mom. So, like...yay? Not yet. There's still a lot of drama going on.<strong>

**And there was the Ame/Russia fluff for you guys. Happy?**

**Read and Review or Belarus knocks the door over, crushing her siblings by accident.**


	12. Comfort for Nobody

**I'm on spring break, so things are updating a little faster.**

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><p>"...Was I really a cute baby?"<p>

"The cutest. You just cried alot." commented Ukraine with lively honesty. She had been talking with Russia for the last hour, calmly explaining and reaffirming Yao's story. She had been hesitant to confirm the reasons why she lied to him, but when she finally said, "To keep you safe.", he responded, "Thank you."

He then asked, "Did it work? The plan?"

"Well, you're still alive, so in some degree, yes. And for a pretty long time, nothing bad really happened. Mongolia never even got close to finding us when you were still a baby. The...the day where he took you away, that was the day you first encountered him. So for many years, you weren't harmed."

"So I was safe for a while?"

"Safe to a degree. But you were always going to be in danger. You still are now."

Before Russia could respond, she continued, "A nation is _always_ going to be in danger. There will always be some sort of threat, even a meaningless one. But a threat. And a threat is always a danger."

She smiled bittersweetly, and caressed an end of his scarf. It was so worn and tattered. She remembered how clean and smooth it had been when she first handed it to him. It was going to always be special to him, and even moreso for her.

"Just be glad you're so strong Ivan. I couldn't imagine if I ever had to lose you."

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><p>Katyusha frowned as she unpacked her bag, gazing at the stone wall in front of her. The abandoned home she had found was in terribly shabby condition, and there was very poor protection from the cold outside. But it would keep her sheltered for a short while. She had trekked back towards her homeland for sake of keeping to her duty as a nation, but traveled nowhere close to her old home. She couldn't ever go back there.<p>

After she had left Yao's home, she traveled back the way she did, but took a different route through the forests. Every night she spent in it was a near living nightmare. Predatory animals never came in sight, but their calls and ominous utters signaled that they were near. These terrified her, as she clutched a dependent life close to her. Ivan was clearly just as disturbed by the noises, and would cry fitfully. Katyusha would hold him close, and murmur, "Go to sleep little one, the animals won't harm you."

As Katyusha unrolled a thick blanket on the ground, she sighed, stretching her aching back. Nearly every night, she would have to sleep on the floor, since there was no beds in the homes she found. A thick blanket would act as her mattress, while her coats or a thinner blanket acted as the covers. Her head would have to simply suffice with the ground as a pillow.

Ivan lay wriggling on the pink fabric square she had folded out. The child showed a certain liking for the fabric, for its softness and warmth, and thus she often wrapped him in it, or used it as a mat for him to sit on. At night, to prevent him from getting cold, Katyusha would lay him on the same bed, sharing body heat. Occasionally, Ivan would cling to her chest, nudging it fussily. Katyusha sighed, knowing he wanted milk, but she knew he couldn't give it to him anymore. If she was going to be his sister, she had to make it more convincing. She cursed her body for still producing, but she thought that Ivan was just barely at the age where he could go without milk. If not, then she could find other substitutes, right?

One day, in the woods, Katyusha found a dead bear, perhaps just a little older than a cub. Using the skills her mother taught her, she skinned it. There wasn't enough fur to make anything for herself, but just enough to make a baby sized coat and hat for Ivan. It would keep him warm when she couldn't. She had taken fabric from one of her mother's old shawls, and made two pairs of gloves out of them, one for her, and one for the child. Now she could prepare for the work of nature Moskva's sire would create. Snow storms were often in this area.

Katyusha bent over, and picked up the small boy. She couldn't help but swell with both pride and wistful hurt that her son was barely small enough to hold in one arm. He was still much smaller than a normal toddler, but he was growing all the same, barely a baby now. It wouldn't be long before he would be able to walk on his own, and he'd be able to say words that were understandable. And she would have to hide her mothers' pride from him, the best she could do would be to say, "Congratulations little brother." And it would hurt to say it. So much.

She sighed as she pulled out his little bearskin coat, and slid it over his head. The fur was soft and warm for him, and nuzzling up against her chest, Ivan felt comfortably swaddled and warm in the coat. She placed him back down on his fabric square, and putting on her own shawl and light coat, grabbed a small hatchet she had packed from her old home. If she wanted to keep this place warm, they'd need firewood. She took Ivan's little bearskin hat from her bag, and gently slid it onto his moderately developed wisps of silver-blond hair. She lifted him back up, shakily holding him in one arm (he was getting too heavy for just one arm), as she carried the hatchet in the other. And with that, she walked out of the house, and into the snowy woods.

Kievan Rus knew that there were plenty of large pine bushes in the woods with thick branches good for burning. The trees were too large, tall, and thick to cut and carry home. She knelt down to the first bush and placed Moskva down on the ground where he sat, looking up curiously. She locked eyes with him, as if to silently tell him, "Now you stay put, alright?"

Moskva gave a small whine of discomfort, and wriggled a little in his seat. His mother took note of his red nose, how it was running, and knew she'd have to make this trip shorter. The poor thing must be catching a cold.

She turned her head, and chopped at the large bush, starting with the stalked branches, laying them in a pile on the side opposite of where Moskva sat. When all that was left was the thick skeleton of wood, she struck at it harder, wood chips flying.

By the time the wood was fully chopped, Kievan Rus had time to turn her head to check on her baby for once. And panicked when she saw the small imprint in the snow was vacant. Moskva was gone.

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><p>As soon as his mother had turned her head, Ivan fidgeted silently, not liking how the snow was soaking through his coat, and leaving him wet. His nose felt funny, and as much as he would have wanted, his arms couldn't quite reach his nose to clean the runny mucus off. He shakily lifted his bottom up with his two stubby feet. The leather slippers on his feet kept him safe from the cold snow. Ivan tried to imitate what his mother did with her feet, and put one in front of the other. But his cognitive skills were still getting tweaked, as he accidentally put one foot back, and walked in reverse a little, before he straightened himself out, and walked forward...away from his mother, wandering off into the woods.<p>

He waddled clumsily in the soft cold snow, curious as he peered at the huge world around him. There were large dark green giants surrounding him, darkening the sky above, and the ground. Ivan was beginning to get scared. He had never been out here without his mother, and he didn't know where she was. He tried to turn himself around, but instead, wandered farther. He snuffled as he kicked the snow with his blocky steps, and his eyes grew wide with awe as he saw the large white field growing close in sight. He walked faster, gleeful with his newfound ability to walk.

As he got outside, he could see something in the distance. It looked like people. Two people actually. Maybe they could take him back to his mother?

"Eli your side's weak!" squeaked the red eyed boy as he padded the snow in his mittens. The snow fort was falling apart. His hair was as white as the snow.

"Well stop taking snow out of it!", frowned the green eyed child, brown hair tucked into a very small ponytail.

"We have to make snowballs somehow!"

"Then get some from the ground!"

"Ok, then we can make a moat! I'm gonna have the awesomest fort ever!"

"'I'? I thought this was ours!"

"Until you decide to become a Teutonic Knight, not on my watch!"

"Hmph, Gilbert, you're so mean!" pouted the other, crossing their arms. They then perked up curiously, as they heard a small coo. Peering over their fort they saw a little boy, only about one and a half years old, hobbling over.

"Hey, who are you?" squawked the albino child, staring at the baby's violet eyes. He was dressed in a small fur coat and hat, looking very, very cold.

"What's your name, kid? My name's Eli!" piped up the other, brusquely cheerful. Ivan opened his mouth wide, letting a small trail of drool bead at the corner of his lip, and babbled something incoherent, that only could be translated out in infant language, "Where's my mama?". The two older children tilted their heads in confusion.

"Well...whaddya think Gilbert, do you think he's a nation like us?"

"Nah, he's probably just some little kid who got lost. Go on home kid."

"Bla." gurgled Ivan who innocently blew a spit bubble, nose snotty and cold. He didn't understand what they were saying, but he hoped that it was about mother.

"...Um, Gil, I don't think he's got anyone else around. He just kinda walked out of the forest."

"...Hm...well, I guess we could watch him until his mom or someone comes around."

"What do we do?"

Gilbert smiled mischeviously at the little baby, who sneezed, leaving a mess down his chin.

"We play 'Teutonic Conquerors'."

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><p>Kievan Rus whirled her head around in panic as she frantically looked for Moskva. She could only hope that he had not wandered off too far. The woods were big and deep, so it was easy for any young child to get lost. She could only imagine where he was, in a snow-sheathed crevice, or drowning in a frozen pond.<p>

She felt slight relief as she saw tiny footprints in the snow, revealing the forest dirt below them. She looked ahead to see their trail.

* * *

><p>"Greetings loyal subject! I am King Prussia, of the Teutonic knights! You are lucky to be found by such an awesome king as me!" squealed the albino boy towards the baby toddling around confusedly in front of him. He and Hungary decided to play "conquerors" with the little one to pass the time. Gilbert had seen his father Germania come back from conquerings all the time, proud as could be. So they must have been fun, right? He knew the little boy in front of him probably wasn't a nation, but it was fun to pretend.<p>

"You may join my brotherhood of knights, as I have spared your life! But you must convert!"

Ivan's nose ran more, as the little child stared up at him.

Eli giggled, and 'he' hopped in front of Ivan, "Convert or be conquered!"

The little one whimpered, his cold giving him discomfort, and nervous without his mother. He thought the green-eyed person in front of him seemed nice, and he tugged at them, face into their shoulder.

Hungary grimaced audibly as they noticed the mucus slobbed onto their winter tunic. They pushed the baby back slightly, letting him stumble back into the snow, falling onto his seat, his bearskin hat bouncing off. He whimpered as it felt the cold air blow at the top of his head.

Prussia grinned playfully once again, "Won't convert? Then it's war!"

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><p>Katyusha followed the footprints quickly, fearing they might lead to some horrific end. But thankfully they led out of the thicker grove of trees, towards the outer field. This could be either a curse or blessing. Ivan could be easy to find, or gone forever.<p>

* * *

><p>The boy swooped up the bearskin hat, giggling. "This will help me gather ammunition!"<p>

Ivan whined, holding his arms out in hope to get his hat back. But he couldn't get back up. His red nose dribbled more, his cold being hard to deal with.

Gilbert ran behind his snow fort, and scooped snow into the hat, like a bowl. He took some back out, and packed it into a snowball. He motioned to Eli to make one too, and soon, both children were staring at the baby in front of them. It was struggling to get back up on its feet.

"Ready..."

Ivan slowly got up, shakily onto his feet, toddling forward. He could barely see over the large snow mound.

"Fire!"

Eli's snowball missed, whizzing by the baby's waist. But Gilbert's hit him square in the mouth, toppling him backwards again. The snowball wasn't that hardly packed or thrown too hard, but it was enough to give the little one a shock, and send him back onto his rear. As a bit of snow hung from his mouth, open in surprise and thought, Ivan's face crumpled as he began to bawl loudly. Fat tears rolled down his face, red as a beet, nose running even more.

The green eyed child gazed nervously, "Um, Gilbert, what're we gonna do? He's crying."

As the baby wailed, Gilbert shrugged it off, "My baby brother cries all the time. He'll stop soon enough. But anyway, victory is ours!"

Both children skipped around the crying baby, gleefully chanting, "We've conquered you, we've conquered you!"

They both stopped in frozen shock as they heard a roaring voice, "What do you think you're doing?"

* * *

><p>They both turned their heads to see a girl much older than them, almost a grown up, marching over angrily. Her eyes were blazing and she looked furious.<p>

Katyusha didn't know how Ivan wandered here, but she could clearly see as she had been approaching Ivan, the two children throwing snowballs, and hitting him. When they chanted something about conquering, she immediately knew they were nations. And the fact that they looked only a few years older than Ivan, and that they were already talking about conquering made her absolutely fearful and angry.

Scooping up the sobbing, shaking mess of Ivan, Katyusha noticed his head was bare, and asked angrily, "Where's his hat?"

The white haired boy's hands shook as he held it up, "T-this?"

Katyusha whisked it out of his hands, "Give me that!", and growled vehemently at the notice of snow dished into the interior. She shook it off onto her thigh and placed it on her baby's head.

She glared, "Who do you think you are, picking on people littler than you? Especially babies!"

"W-we were only playing..." whimpered the green eyed boy/girl (Katyusha couldn't tell), looking up guiltily.

Katyusha's glare lowered slightly, as she felt a pain in her chest. So this was how nations could handle being so barbaric sometimes. They were taught that it was like a game?

* * *

><p>Saying nothing more, Katyusha whirled around, and marched home angrily, not even thinking to comfort Ivan, who cried louder than ever. She stopped halfway home, to pick up the pile of branches by the bush she had trimmed down. Taking them inside, she put the sobbing child down on the fabric mat, and used a shovel to dig a firepit. Her face was blank and undecisive. Throwing the sticks in the pit, she lit them, warming the home.<p>

She then turned around, and picked up her child. His nose ran snottily, his cold very bad, and tears made his face crumpled. Face still blank, she reached up her hand to pull his wet hat off his head. With tenderness, she preened his soft wispy hair as he cried. His wails barely softened since they returned home.

She rocked him slowly back and forth as she held him close to her, as the fire grew warm. She began to murmur a melody from long ago, when her nights were harsh and difficult, and her mother was able to make them peaceful again.

_Baby mine, don't you cry_

_ Baby mine, dry your eyes_

She kissed her baby's head as the sobs began to dissolve into hiccups. This was the first time she had used a lullaby for her child, and most likely the last.

_Rest your head close to my heart _

_Never to part, baby of mine_

After some time, as the glow of warmth continued, and the melody grew sweeter, sleep overcame the frightened. And the tears transferred to Katyusha's eyes instead.

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><p><strong>So we saw a toddler!Prussia and Hungary together. They're kind of asshole kids, I'm sorry. <strong>

**The song she sang is from one of my favorite Disney movies, _Dumbo_. I can kind of imagine it as a song that is used as a lullaby.**

**Read and Review or Prussia comes back for Ivan's soul. And the hat.**


	13. Adoption of Nobody

**Not much to say...**

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><p>Ukraine sighed as memories of Ivan as a child grew clearer. She felt somewhat relieved that she could remember them, so she could help him remember or relive his happier days.<p>

Russia tilted his head in thought, "So those two children who hit me with a snowball...they were nations, right?"

"Yes. And I told them off making sure they never hurt you again."

"The boy was Prussia; by what you've described, wasn't he?"

"Yes."

Russia smirked, "Figures. I guess it's no question why I feel such a keen desire to punch him in the head every time I see him then."

Ukraine rolled her weary eyes, "Can you please try to get along with him?"

"No promises."

Ukraine pouted, but a good-humored look in her eye proved she was in a warm mood.

Russia then thought a moment, amidst the light-heartedness, and then asked quietly,

"Wait...what about Belarus? If I'm your son...does that mean you're her mother too?"

Ukraine's smile shrank, and she took a deep breath and sighed, "That's another story I'll need to tell you. A lot of explaining and very confusing. But I will just say this for now; no, Belarus is not my child; only you are."

Russia raised an eyebrow, "So then she's not my sister?"

"No, she's still your sister."

"Ukraine, how does that even work?" he asked confused.

"It's perplexing, I'm sorry. But I'll try my best to make it easy to understand."

* * *

><p>"Kashya!" whined the little boy waddling through the snow, "Kashya, boo's are cold! Fee' are cold!"<p>

"I told you they were too big for you Ivan. Now the snow's falling in.", she smirked. He was still so tiny, and his face still looked so babylike. His hair was thick and fluffy, spilling under his little hat. He was starting to talk now, his words slurred together as he spoke, but it was a sign of his growth. Katyusha thought his way of saying her name was rather cute, not being able to say it correctly, making it sound like 'Kashya' or 'Kahoosha'.

"Kashya, sesta...", he babbled, mispronouncing 'sestra', "My feet col'."

She looked at him, and sighed with a smile, "If I carry you, will you stop complaining?"

The boy pouted in thought, and then nodded, "Da."

And so, she lifted the little one up, and repositioned him so he was clinging to her shoulder. He was getting heavier every day it seemed. Although he was tiny, he was quite chubby. Katyusha knew it was just his baby fat still clinging to him, and didn't worry too much about it. She did feel a little worried about him making any friends when he got older, especially since he was so small and naive. She could only hope for the best.

"Sestaaa..." he beamed as he swung one of his legs, "Sesta so biiig."

"Yes Ivan."

"Big sesta." he murmured as he wiped a bit of drool from his lip with his tiny hand. He lay one side of his cold red face onto her shoulder, and whined into her clothes, "Col'."

"I know Ivan. We're almost home."

He rubbed his cheek against her shoulder once again, the cold discomforting. He wanted to go inside and lay under his favorite pink blanket. Next to his sister. She was always so warm to him.

Katyusha still ached over the fact she surrendered her motherhood for this. Her breasts still ached with the lingering milk inside them. Since her little one was growing so fast, and she wasn't, she couldn't help but feel like she was lagging behind.

Stepping into the forest where their home was, the sky became darker, enshrouded in the trees. The air became slightly colder. Kievan Rus' shoes crunched through the snow, the noise audible to Moskva, who was growing tense with the dark woods. Even if they lived in them, he couldn't help but feel scared of them. A wolf howled in the distance, and he gave a whine of fright, clinging tightly to his sister. She cooed gently, assuring him it was alright. Soon enough they were home, where little Ivan could be heard breathing a sigh of relief as his sister set their firewood down.

Katyusha pulled his tiny boots off, revealing very chilly red feet. His nose ran as the air got warmer. Katyusha took his hat off for him, and laid him on their 'bed' under his pink blanket. The toddler snuggled under the covers and soon his eyes closed in exhaustion, his childish energy zapped for the day.

Katyusha took off her own snow clothes, and pulled out vegetables for soup. While the little boy napped, she could make something to eat.

As she was about to light a fire under the kettle, she heard what sounded like a screech echoing in the forest. She jolted up in shock, nearly dropping the stick in her hand. Ivan rolled over, seemingly undisturbed by the noise. The boy cried a lot, but he could sleep through almost anything.

Katyusha decided it was just some sort of bird in the woods, like a hawk or falcon. She went back to work on the fire. Soon enough it was glowing brightly.

* * *

><p>As she peeled the beets, frantic footsteps crunching in the snow were heard from outside. She tilted her head slightly, trying to focus on where they might be directed. A slight pool of nervousness formed in her stomach as she heard the noises grow louder.<p>

A hurried rap on her door made her jump and scream. Fearing the worst, she ran, swooped Ivan from off the floor, and hid behind a table. The boy gave a sound signaling suprise from being woken up, and confusion as to why he was being pulled off the floor. She clutched the little one tight to her chest, making him feel constricted.

"Kashya?"

"Shh." she said quickly. Her heart was beating a mile a minute. It grew even more frantic when she heard a pained female voice echo from behind the door, "Help..."

Katyusha slowly raised her head from above the table and gazed at the door. The voice that she heard was not a cruel demanding foreign voice, but a pleading agonized one. She was certain now that she was not threatened or in need of help, but the person behind it might have been. She hesitantly rose to her feet.

Carrying Ivan in her arm, she made slow tiny steps towards the door, trying to focus on any stray sounds that might come from behind it. Soon enough, she was just inches away from it. Pressing herself and Ivan against the flat wood frame, she slowly turned the door handle and creaked it open.

She peered through the crack, and with absolute shock, swung it open as she gazed at the sight in front of her. A girl, perhaps only slightly younger than Katyusha lay crumpled in the snow. Thinly clad with shabby clothing, she shivered slightly. Her long blond hair was stringy and unclean, caked slightly with blood. She was curled on her side, exposing her very large stomach. It didn't even take two seconds for Yetkaterina to realize she was pregnant, about eight or nine months. A red stain seeped from an unseen wound on the girl's upper torso, plaguing the pure white snow.

"M-my God...", Katyusha whispered in fright under her breath. The stranger rose her head up to face the nation, as she choked, "P-please help..."

In a state of panicked and confused immediacy, Katyusha placed Ivan on his pink blanket, where he lay back down, and shut his eyes, slightly irked by the rude awakening. She ran back to the door, and stepped outside, kneeling down to the girl.

"what happened? Are you alright?" she asked breath heavy, trying to keep calm.

"I-I need a doctor...m-my baby it's..."

The girl curled herself in tighter as a wave of pain surfed through. Katyusha's mind jolted back to memories of Ivan's birth, of how she lay racked in pain and fever as life came into the world. It had been unbearable and was etched into her mind.

Katyusha subconsciously caressed the girl's forehead comfortingly, as she tried to think of what to do. The girl was obviously in bad shape, and bleeding. She couldn't be left alone.

Sighing, she put her arms underneath the girl, and lifted with her knees. She was so thin and scraggly, it was honestly somewhat pathetic. She carried her inside, and lay her on the floor-mattress. Blood was still seeping freshly from under the girl's clothing. Katyusha gaped as she scanned over her body, and found a large fresh knife wound in the girl's midsection. Just above the stomach. She could only hope that it did not harm the unborn child in her.

She took her coat and rolled it under the waif like a pillow. She then asked softly, "Can you tell me what happened?"

"...I...I was attacked..."

"By who?" she asked, eyes curious. The girl merely shivered and looked away. Katyusha decided to try a different approach, then. She sweetly asked,

"Can you tell me your name?"

"E-elena." grimaced the girl, tensing up as another contraction came through. Her blue eyes were wide with fear.

"Elena.", smiled Katyusha, trying to stay calm in front of the girl, "Do you have any family Elena?"

"N-no. I...I never have."

"So there's nobody I can contact for you?"

"No..."

"In that case then, you can stay here until you're well, alright?"

"R-right..." Elena nodded, but not very seriously. She stared up at Katyusha, and whined, "L-listen, you can keep a secret for me, right?"

"U-um...I guess?" replied the other, confused by the oddness of the ailing woman.

"I-I don't think I have very long, b-but I need someone to take care of my baby in case I go...a-and they'll need to know that...I'm a nation...and my baby might be too."

Kievan Rus' blue eyes widened in surprise, "Y-you're a nation? What's your name?"

"I-I am White Rus...I-I never wanted this to happen...Oh please Miss...don't tell anyone else..." she cried, tears of shame and pain running down her cheeks.

"I-It's okay..." whispered Kievan Rus, who pet White's unclean hair soothingly, "I guess then it's alright to tell you that I am a nation as well...Kievan Rus..."

"Kie-Kievan...oh my God..." gasped Elena in horror.

"What?"

"H-he thought...he..."

"What?" she asked, confused at the sudden reaction of Elena.

"He thought I was you."

"Who did?", asked Katyusha, dread growing in her stomach.

"I-I don't know. I-I was walking to find shelter when some giant man approached me...He asked me if I was a nation, and when I said yes...he...he whispered something like 'I've got you now Kievan Rus...', and stabbed me. I screamed for help, and he ran off. I-I think my water broke shortly after..."

"Elena, I need to know one thing. Did this man have a long thin moustache or black hair?"

The girl gasped a little, "Y-yes...I think..."

Katyusha's heart stopped, "Which way did he go?"

"I...I think he ran away. I don't think he's going to come back..."

Katyusha was not going to believe that for an instant. She tried her best to not panic, as the fears of Mongolia coming for her and Ivan began to grow. But her thoughts were interrupted by a lamentful sob.

"How could I have been so stupid?"

Katyusha looked at Elena, whose weary face was twisted with pain and regret. She clutched her large belly in pain, and continued her thoughts.

"I-I thought that for a while, maybe I would have been loved...that he might have loved me..."

Katyusha thought a moment, confused, and then realized Elena must have been talking about her baby's father.

"B-but when I got pregnant in the wintertime, he...he grew angry, and my home was snowed in...my nation is covered in snow now..."

Kievan Rus took a quick glance over at Moskva, making sure he was still asleep, and turned her attention back to White, who gave a weak contemptful smile.

"But that's what I get for loving Winter."

Katyusha's eyes widened as her heart skipped at least three beats. Winter had found someone else? Another nation? And now she was carrying his child? Savva had told her he loved her. That night they made love, he told her he_ loved_ her. And now he had given those same words to another unsuspecting girl nation.

Tears threatened to burn her eyes. She had been a victim of Winter's cruel game. She was left alone to care for a child that she initially didn't want. She loved Ivan now, and wouldn't dare let anything happen to him, but what Savva did was just wrong. Her heart felt like it was ripping apart.

Her pain only slightly subsided as she turned her attention back to White Rus, whose wounds were growing raw and spasms of agony racked through her as the contractions grew harsh.

Katyusha stroked Elena's forehead gently, as the young nation cried. Katyusha's pain could wait for later. This girl's could not. She tried her best to remember everything her mother had told her about babies, and childbirth. She may have not ever helped deliver a baby, but she had given birth to Ivan, which was first person experience. And theoretically, since Winter fathered this child it would be Moskva's half-sibling. So she would have to do _something_ for the girl, right?

Sighing, she took White Rus' hand, and gave it a supportive squeeze. This was going to be a long night.

* * *

><p>The sun was barely starting to rise when Katyusha looked down at the little bundle in her arms. It was a little girl, clearly born very early with its tiny size. It lay silent as it wriggled slightly. It had a thin layer of pale blond curls on its head. Unlike Ivan, this baby was noisy when it emerged, but quiet as the time went on. She smiled sweetly at it, and glanced over to Ivan, who lay asleep on his mat still.<p>

She then glanced mournfully over to Elena, curled up lifelessly on the floor. The sickly woman nation had suffered too much from the wounds Mongolia gave her, and the stress of childbirth. She had fallen asleep and her life vanished like a candle in the breeze sometime during the night. She never even got to name her baby or feed her for the first time. Katyusha never even told her about Savva.

Katyusha sighed as she stared at the tiny baby in her arms. It was orphaned without a mother. It would have to carry its mother's title as White Rus now.

Katyusha looked at the little child, and realized how much it reminded her of Ivan. Tiny, but with potential to be great. This child had potential to be great, and to be loved. Elena was a girl with nobody to really love her. For her daughter, it could be different.

_Alright little one, it looks like I'll have to take you in if nobody else will. You're innocent, and you can be loved. I'll accept you as my little one._

Making sure Ivan was still asleep, Katyusha opened her shirt to free one of her large breasts, still producing milk after all this time. Hesitantly, she nudged the little girl's head forward, as she let it eat the food it needed.

_You can be Ivan's little sister...and I can be your mother. But not when he's looking._

The baby finished suckling, and gave a noiseless sigh, as it nuzzled toward its mother figure.

Katyusha pet its soft pale hair, as she sighed lamenting over why her lover had betrayed her.

"Savva, why did you betray me?"

A cold draft came under the door, with words only heard in Kievan Rus' mind.

_I'm not Savva, I'm Winter. Savva was some pathetic boy I decided to no longer be. The girl I was with, the mother of that bastard child you're holding, was nothing but a pathetic whore I felt sorry for. Whatever feelings I have for you disappeared with 'Savva'.Face the facts, you're on your own._

Katyusha said nothing, as she couldn't argue against what she now believed. Savva was gone, and there was nothing left but the cruelty of Winter. Savva would have never said things like that. He and Winter were completely different people.

A few hours later, she carried Elena outside. She buried the deceased nation in the snow, lamenting over how the girl could have been her little sister, or her friend if she had lived. She realized that the poor girl could have been beautiful. She was ravaged, but it was clear that she was once pretty.

When she came back inside, she called to Ivan, "Ivan, please wake up, and come meet your little sister. _Our_ little sister."

The baby girl's first sight when she opened her blue eyes was the smiling face of Ivan as he gazed at her proudly. And it was the sight she would love most in the world.

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><p><strong>Long story short, Belarus is Russia's half sister. Ukraine adopted her as her daughter, but only fed her or such when Ivan wasn't awake or looking. So she's been hiding this secret from Belarus as well.<strong>

**White Rus is a name for the ancient part of Belarus, or Minsk.**

**Read and Review or someone else dies. *I'm going to bed, I'm tired, happy easter***

**EDIT Easter Morning: Blargh, sorry guys, I was tired last night, so I got up and fixed some typos today. I also added some more dialogue since it was starting to get thin there.**


	14. Scarf for Nobody

**This chapter is noticeably shorter than the others, but it is going to act as the start of the climax. So this is more like an interlude.**

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><p>For some time, after that afternoon, things went back to normal. Ivan and Katyusha agreed to keep this secret between the two of them, and made sure Yao and Alfred would not tell anyone else. They also agreed not to tell Natalia. Not until she had collected her loose wits. Or until the time seemed right.<p>

During this time, the two spent more time together, to make up for the time that was lost. Ivan had made it manditory for himself to visit Katyusha at least twice a week, wether it be for tea, or a simple hello. The connections could become better that way. Once, they went out to lunch, and Katyusha ended up buying a new hat, and Ivan a new scarf, sky blue with fluffy clouds. It was a scarf meant for children, but it was so soft, he couldn't resist. Ivan reminded himself to invite Katyusha to the seashore, since he knew she liked it so much.

Ivan did however notice that his mother was starting to get weaker and more tired. Circles of weariness remained under her eyes, and she walked stiffer than normal. He figured it must have been because she was older than him and was simply more tired now. But he couldn't help but think there was something else wrong. He grew especially worried as the day before, she had a terrible coughing fit. When she had stopped, she had smiled at him, and joked nervously, "Looks like I'd better stop smoking?" Ivan knew she had been lying, because she had stopped smoking after World War I. Whatever was wrong was something he'd have to find out. And he'd find out today.

He tugged at his scarf, and sighed into it. She had told him about when she had made it, and it made him think of the days before the Mongol invasion. When he was still a kid, and was able to enjoy his innocence. Before he had to grow up. He was not safe, or well off, but he was happy.

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><p>Katyusha watched as Ivan, hopped about in the snow happily, waving a stick in the air as he giggled. He tapped it on Natalia's head, spooking her momentarily, but soon the tiny girl squealed in delight and awe as her big brother plowed through the heavy snowdrifts. Both children had grown up so fast through these years. Ivan looked about six, while Natalia looked about two, her pale blonde hair stringing below her chin. Moskva's little bearskin coat and hat were too small for him now, and they were given to Minsk, so Kievan Rus didn't have to make one for her.<p>

When Ivan got too big for his fur baby clothes, Katyusha bought thick fabric, and sewed it together to make a new coat. It was very patchy and primitive, but durable. But still, Ivan looked so_ cold_. Whenever children came in from the snow, their noses would be red and runny, and their cheeks rosy, teeth chattering. Those were the symptoms after a full day of play, but it took Ivan only ten minutes to tire out. Katyusha knew it wasn't a big deal now, but when they had to continue moving on, perhaps leaving their home, Ivan wouldn't make it in the cold climate this winter. He would need something else to keep him warm.

So when Katyusha noticed how Ivan's face was most susceptible to the cold, she decided to make him a scarf. She knew it wouldn't be too much of a task, since she knew how to knit and sew clothes. If she was lucky, the scarf could be made out of any fabric material. But she had no yarn or knitting needles. She'd have to use something else.

She had looked around their shabby home, coming across the old glass baby bottle her mother had given her; using it to keep her children fed without relying on breastfeeding, the red lantern Yao gave her; she had allowed Ivan to use it as a ball once and he nearly broke it, and the pink fabric piece.

The fabric was long and thick, folded up and stashed in the corner for the last few years. Ivan had grown to old to sleep with a 'baby blanket', and so it was put away. Katyusha didn't have the heart to get rid of it. It was her mother's. She knew it was the same fabric piece that was used to hold her son when he was born, to clean him. She knew it was how she kept him warm, swaddling him in a little bundle at night. Whenever the little one slept on or under it, Katyusha couldn't help but think the pink color fit him very well.

And so she took it from the corner, unfolded it to its full size, and began to work away. She knew it would be easy to make; to simply slice a thick strip of the piece lengthwise, and fix the edges. Instant scarf. She was so shocked that the whole thing, when unfolded completely was nearly five feet long.

Cutting the piece cleanly, she had a smooth thick ribbon of fabric. She cleaned it using the snow, brightening its rosy color. She then took her sewing needle, and embroidered the edges with light pink thread she had kept, tearing away the frays. Within a small amount of time, it was done.

She noticed her children huddled out in the snow, Ivan hugging his sister, as she snuggled into his hold. Poor thing must have been out too long.

Katyusha walked out into the snow, and heard Natalia whine, "S'cold."

"Da." murmured Ivan quietly, "I know."

"You could have always come back inside, nothing's keeping you from that." reminded Katyusha, as she approached them. Ivan turned around, his nose beet red, as he stared wide-eyed at the scarf.

"Is that a scarf?", he asked quietly, the cold zapping his energy.

"Yes. I made it just for you." she smiled, kneeling down to wrap it around him. Natalia gave a small frown up, as she clung to Ivan tighter. She seemed even more fussy when Ivan broke free from her to hug Katyusha.

Ivan snuggled into the scarf, sighing contently as he felt its soft interior cushion his nose, allowing his heated breath to vent all over his muffled face, effectively warming him. It was nice and soft on his neck as well.

"It looks cute on you little brother.", smiled Katyusha, eyes warm. She then turned her attention to Natalia, who whined in disdain, and discomfort. Katyusha didn't realize this until she took them inside and took off their coats, but Ivan had allowed Natalia to shove snow down her coat, and it was beginning to melt, leaving her wet.

After scolding Ivan, Katyusha had tried to clean up the little one, but Natalia seemed almost venemously opposed to the idea. For some time, it seemed as if Natalia had a certain dislike towards Katyusha. At first, it seemed like natural fussiness, but the mother nation couldn't help but feel as if there was an indefinite coldness in the little girl towards her. It worried her, but she didn't feel too worried when she saw the little child smiling happily as Ivan shared one end of his new scarf with her.

* * *

><p>Russia had driven up to Ukraine's home early that afternoon, parking on the curb. As he approached the house however, he couldn't help but feel there was something off, some canny sense of dread. He quickly shook it off, as he knocked on the door gently.<p>

When there was no answer or immediate signal that there might be, Ivan knocked again, calling out with a smile, "Ukraine, it's me, Russia."

The silence remained, and at first, Ivan assumed that since she seemed to be getting stiffer, maybe she just didn't feel like opening the door. At least, that's what he told himself. Thankfully, Katyusha always had an extra key somewhere under her doormat. Fishing it out, Ivan turned the handle, and opened the door.

"Ukraine, it's me, Russia. I'm here to see you today! Hello?"

The house was silent. Ivan breathed a moment, and a feeling of unease started to come on, heavily.

"Ukraine?" he called out, walking into her living room, only to find it empty. He looked around, trying to find anything that signaled her presence in the home. He found a cup of tea, half full, and only fairly warm.

"Katyusha?" he called out, walking down her hallway. _Maybe she's gone out for the day?_, he asked himself. He didn't really think that would be the case, since the Ukrainian nation had been home for many weeks, not leaving for anything but the mail or newspapers.

He walked towards her bedroom, and turned the handle, "Katyusha, are you in here I-"

He froze in his tracks, and his eyes widened, as his heart nearly stopped, breath becoming a gasp, as he stared with wide, shocked eyes at the sight in front of him, on the ground.

_"Mama?"_

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><p><strong>Cliffhanger! Hanging from a cliiiiff! And that's why he's called Cliff Hanger! (virtual cookies to whoever gets the reference)<strong>

**Read and Review or Ivan's scarf comes to life, and eats everybody.**


	15. Fears of Nobody

**Agh, I'm REALLY sorry this took so long. But thank you for your patience!**

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><p>The next hour was pandemonium, as Russia frantically called the hopsital, and was forced to wait in silence, ignored and uninformed as the stranger paramedics lifted the unconscious Ukraine onto a stretcher, and off into the ambulance. Russia begged to climb in, and come along, but they told him no, and that there was no room.<p>

"I'm not leaving my sister alone!" cried the Russian, beside himself with fear. "She needs me!"

"She's breathing fine, son. She's just passed out.", muttered one of the paramedics, "We'll get one of the doctors to call you when we've got a diagnosis or something. Just calm down."

_Yeah, right! Calm down! I want to know what's wrong now!_, thought Ivan in his head, as he blankly nodded and watched as the ambulance door slammed shut, and sped off, siren wailing. As soon as the ambulance was out of sight, Ivan just began to cry, bawling like a little child left at the school bus stop. He was just left there, standing in Katyusha's front yard, left in the dark once again. He wasn't crying because his mother was ill. He was crying because he knew there was something she was not telling him. And he worried, because it was most definitely something bad.

He tried not to worry about losing her. She was a nation, so she'd pull through. She had to. Hopefully the paramedic was right, she was just passed out. Maybe she was just tired. Maybe she was fine.

Trying his best to calm down, the still sobbing Russia went inside Ukraine's house, so he wouldn't cause a ruckus. As he got inside, wiping his eyes with his scarf, he noticed Ukraine's teacup had fallen off the table in midst of the mayhem, spilling on the carpet.

Sighing, with shortness of breath, Russia took a cold cloth, and wiped up the cool brown stain. Picking up the teacup, he frowned slightly. The cup had a chip in it, by the handle. This was part of Ukraine's favorite tea set. Pouting, he took the chipped porcelain cup into the kitchen, and put it on Katyusha's kitchen-window sill, along with a painted shot glass that was broken on the bottom, and a button for one of her shirts. She had yet to fix them. When she got home.._.if_ she got home from the hospital, she could get to fixing them.

Ivan shivered slightly as worry pooled into his stomach once again. Being alone in Katyusha's house was very unsettling. It wasn't his home, and it seemed empty without the Ukrainian. He was trying his best to repress the fear of losing his mother forever to the very back of his thoughts. But the image of her limp on the stretcher, eyes sunken in with exhaustion and face gaunt and pale was still pressed into his conscience.

He tried to ignore it still. He had lost his family once, and he didn't want to lose them again.

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><p>It had been an incredibly cold day when Katyusha had gone out to collect firewood. It was about the middle of winter, just past Ivan's last birthday. He had grown only slightly in the last few years, and was quite chubby, despite the fact he ate just as little as his siblings. He was still so tiny, he was easy to mistake for a seven year old, when he was supposed to be about ten.<p>

The weather was clear, but cold, snow having stopped falling that day. And the woods were still and silent, as normal.

Katyusha had left Ivan on his own enough times to trust he'd be alright. She didn't think this time would be any different. The woods were still quiet, so nothing would happen. At least that's what she thought.

As she returned back home, she could smell the familiar haze of wood charring in flame, light and wispy. But as she got closer to home, the air grew thicker and smokier. She felt dread in her chest, as she hurried her pace. When she returned home, she nearly screamed.

Her home was gone. Burned to the ground, smoldering a bright orange in some small divets of the wood. Soot blackened the once pure snow, while sparks and embers melted small patches.

Katyusha felt her heart beat faster than ever, as her throat dried. She had only one question in her head, _Where are my children!_

As she stumbled closer, knees locking in fear, she tried to get as close as she could to the remains of her home, without the heat overtaking her. Within the flaming pile of wood and debris, nothing was recognizable or salvagable. She shook, feeling sick to her stomach, as she realized everything could be gone.

She felt a slight bit of relief when she heard a small voice pipe up, "Kashyaaaa...", and she turned around to see Natalia huddled under a bush, shivering with cold and fear. Her hair and face were dirty with soot, and her dress too, but other than that, she seemed fine.

"Natalia!" she whispered, hugging the girl close in an instant, "Thank heavens you're safe..."

The little girl squirmed, as she whined, "Bad man...bad man came and kicked us out."

Katyusha gasped, "What? What bad man?"

"Bad man. Was like a big dragon." whined the little girl, rubbing her eyes. A dragon...perhaps with whiskers? If that was the case, then most likely, Natalia had seen Mongolia...had he gone through the forest? The woman instantly realized something was missing, "Ivan...where's Ivan, Natty?"

Natalia whimpered, "Bad man took him away on a black horse."

Katyusha's eyes widened. Mongolia had indeed come into the woods. He didn't just raid the village. He was after Ivan, and found him when he was most vulnerable...alone. And it was her fault,

She squeezed her eyes shut, trying to believe it was not true. But as her little girl continued to ask where her brother was, she realized she had failed. She had failed to keep Ivan safe, and now he was gone...to where she didn't know. But she knew wherever he was, she had failed to keep him from it. He was gone. Her little boy, the one she bore, nursed, and raised all on her own was gone.

She raised her head towards the sky and screamed in horror and pain, the shrillness breaking the silence.

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><p><em>Ivan frowned as the tall man stood in the doorway. His golden eyes frightened him, but he tried his best not to look scared. He was the one who screamed, not Natty, when the door was broken down. He had seen the man trying to pound on the door, and Ivan told his little sister to stay quiet. when she asked why, he said,<em>

_"Because there's a bad man out there."_

_Ivan clutched the broomstick in his hands, prepared to strike if the large darkhaired man tried to do anything._

_Mongolia smirked coldly. He had been watching this family for the last week. He knew the mother was a nation, but he didn't want her. He could have killed her, but it was too easy. He just knew he wanted the boy, and he could worry about the woman later. The boy was small and weak. He would grow up soft with his mother, and Mongolia wouldn't feel bad at all if the sniveling little brat was killed by conquerors._

_He took a glance at the little girl. She was no good to him. Too small and young._

_Ivan saw the large man glaring coldly at his little sister, and fearing the worst he might do, gave a shrill cry of attack, and swung the broomstick straight into the man's legs with a 'thunk' sound. Mongolia looked down, and frowned. With a cruel snarl, he reached down, and pulled the boy up by the collar, and stared him right in the eyes. His large purple eyes were scared._

_Chuckling sadistically, he took his other hand, and pressing hard with his thumb and forefinger, tilted Ivan's chin up._

_"You have a lot to learn, ingrate." he growled. He then slapped the boy across the face with enough strength to knock him out. Ivan didn't suspect a thing before his world went black._

_Mongolia chuckled to himself, and glaring back at Natalia, whose eyes were wide with fear, he barked, "Get out."_

_Natalia screamed, as she ran out the door and hid behind the bush. She cowered down, waiting for Ivan to come find her. But after some minutes, she heard the braying of a horse, and looked up. Her house was already on fire, smoke billowing out the window. She saw the bad man climbing onto his horse, Ivan slung over the side. His eyes were closed._

_"Ivan!" cried Natalia, "Wake up Ivan!"_

_But before she could cry anything else, the horse jolted with a start, and trotted away, before rushing into a rapid gallop. Soon enough it was out of sight, leaving the little girl on her own, to cower in the bush, crying for her brother, as the house burned brighter._

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><p>Ivan was shaking when he entered the hospital, reluctant to go in. The sterile smell entered his nose immediately, pungent and overwhelming. He had recieved a phone call earlier, from the doctors, telling him he could come see his 'sister'. When he asked what was wrong, they gave no answer.<p>

He immediately demanded to know where her room was, and as soon as the number was given, he sped off in that direction, not bothering to let the nurse escort him. The clean whiteness of the walls and lights was almost blinding for him.

So as to not startle Ukraine, Russia opened the door gently. She lay sleeping gently on the bed, wearing a flannel nightgown, white with small navy blue flowers spotting it. An IV trailed to one of her arms, connected from a bag of water. On the right side of her throat, on her neck, a piece of gauze was taped to her skin. Ivan didn't think of looking at her chart, connected to the bed.

He went over to one of the sides of the bed, and let his hand brush against the blankets. Katyusha barely stirred.

He whispered gently, "Ukraine?"

Her weary eyes fluttered a moment, then opened in confusion, "I-Ivan? What are you doing here?"

"You...you were passed out on your floor. I tried to wake you, but you were out cold. S-so I called the hospital. And they asked me to come here..."

"...I see..." she sighed, her hand trailing up to feel the gauze on her neck. She could still feel the sting from the biopsy. They wouldn't find anything, she knew it, but there was definitely something wrong with her. And even if they found something, she wasn't going to do anything about it.

"Katyusha..." he murmured pleadingly. She looked away.

"M-mama..." he addressed, worry in his face, "Please tell me what is wrong..."

"I-I don't know..." she shakily answered, trying to avoid this a little longer. But the expression on Ivan's face proved that he knew she was aware of what was wrong. She could feel her eyes burning as she sighed, throat tightening.

"I-Ivan, come here..." she motioned, pointing to the edge of her bed, where he promptly got up, and sat on. She held out her arms, allowing him to lean into a hug. Holding him tightly, she rubbed the back of his head with her hand, ruffling his hair affectionately. But she didn't let go.

"D-do you remember what I told you about my mother telling me about a mother nation's eventual mortality, and how she wouldn't be around forever?"

"Da..."

"And how I wouldn't be around forever either?"

"Da, but you're still young. You've got time."

"Ivan, I'm far older than you...and weaker. My years are catching up with me..."

"What?"

"I don't have very long, Ivan. I'm too old, and since I'm your mother, I can't be around forever either..."

"...No."

"Ivan..."

"No, it's not true! Y-you're lying again! You're not dying, you can't be!"

"Ivan...I'm older than I look. And I'm too weak to carry on much longer...please, just try to understand."

"You can't die! You can't leave me!" cried Ivan, tears already starting to fall.

"I'm not going to leave you. I'll be with you I promise. C-can we please just make our last times meaningful?"

By now, he was crying too hard to make a coherent response. So Ukraine simply responded by holding him as tight as her body would allow her to, rubbing his back soothingly, as she cried silently, along with him. This would be difficult for the both of them, but as soon as Russia came to terms with it, they'd be able to go forward with no regrets.

Ivan refused to leave the hospital that night, fearing his mother might die without him there during the night. She didn't, and she requested that someone escort her exhausted son home.

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><p><strong>So things are starting to spiral downward again for these two.<strong>

**After this, is a couple more chapters, then an epilogue. **

**Thanks for all of your patience guys, I appreciate it!**

**Read and Review, or Dr. House is going to operate on Kat.**


	16. Regrets of Nobody

**Not much to say, except this is one of the longest, most intense chapters!**

**Read and review, or no more funny threats.**

**BTW, next chapter is the LAST chapter, and then there's the epilogue.**

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><p>Ivan was growing frustrated now. Not because of the cirumstances of his mother, but that he couldn't see her. Someone was always taking up her time. The last time he went to the hospital to visit her, Canada was already in there, a near emotional wreck. Ivan decided it would have been best for him to leave them. He knew how much Canada loved his mother, and he could tell that Matthew knew...he knew about Katyusha's condition, and he was doing his best to cope with it. Ivan thought it best he never tell Matthew about him and Katyusha, knowing it would only make it worse.<p>

The time before, Belarus was there, staring at his mother blankly, as she slept. Ivan didn't even enter the room, uneasy with the look on Natalia's face.

He decided that today, even if somebody else was going to try and take his time away, he'd go to the hospital, to talk to his mother. He still denied that she was dying, but he knew it was near inevitable to run away from. She was right, she was old.

He just couldn't believe it. He had just found his mother, and very soon, she would be lost again.

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><p>Katyusha sighed as she swept the rest of the hay off the ground, and into a pile by the shed. This farmhouse was too big for her to clean all by herself. She needed someone else to help her. Natalia had caught some strange illness that crippled her legs, and it would be some time before she could walk normally. She just sat in the house, walking stick nearby, so she could at least get somewhere, and she would look out the window looking for her brother, waiting for him to come back.<p>

It had been many years since they had last seen him. In fact, the last time they saw him, he was getting taken away. And now, Katyusha didn't know anything. She didn't know if he was well, if he was ill, or if he was even alive. At this time, she didn't even think that he would return. It sank her heart to think that her little boy might be dead.

Putting the broom against the shed, she went back inside the house to make tea for her and White Rus- Belarus. Ever since the day Moskva was kidnapped, Katyusha was no longer Kievan Rus. She changed her name to the Ukraine. She didn't know if Moskva's name was changed or not. She didn't know anything about him anymore. Other than that he was gone.

She had tried to move on, live normally, but how could she? She was a failure as a mother, she knew it. She couldn't even try with Natalia. As the little girl grew up, she grew colder and distant.

Katyusha soon brought in a steaming teacup for her 'sister' and placed it on an end table. Natalia didn't say anything.

"Do you want anything to eat?" asked Ukraine softly, trying to get her child's attention. Belarus didn't even twitch, continuing to stare coldly out the window.

"I think we have some nice beets growing out front, would you like some soup if I made it?"

"Fine." spoke the girl with no emotion.

"And some bread! We've got some bread left from last nigh-"

"Just soup."

"...Alright then. Well I'll have some bread for myself."

"Go 'head." shrugged the young girl, her hand reaching to fiddle with her primitive walking stick. That damned fever. If she hadn't gotten sick, her legs would have been fine.

Ukraine heated up a fire, and began to prepare the soup when she heard commotion out in the street. She poked her head out the door, and saw villagers swarming the streets. She went out curiously, and asked a man,

"What's going on?"

"The Mongols are driven off! For good! The Golden Horde is gone!"

"Gone?" she asked, excitement spiking her chest, "What do you mean?"

"It's been conquered by soldiers from Muscovy!"

"Muscovy?"

"Moskva, you silly woman!" cried the man, grinning cheerfully. He then cried to the people, "A drink for all on the house who go to my tavern tonight!", and ran off, amidst cheers of glee.

Katyusha nearly felt her heart fall out of her chest. Moskva conquered Mongolia? Ivan was alive?

Smiling widely herself, she ran back to her house, and screamed at the top of her lungs, "NATALIA!"

Belarus screamed in surprise, and angrily shouted back, "What?"

"I-Ivan conquered Mongolia! He's free!"

"He's free? You mean he's alive!"

"Y-yes! Yes he's alive!" she replied, nearly breathless from shock and exhaustion. Natalia gave a rare cheer of joy, grinning madly, eyes shining with glee, "I knew it!"

"I-I knew it too. I knew it too." Ukraine smiled, and without thinking hugged her child. She was surprised and relieved when she got one back.

"When's he going to come home?" asked Natalia, smiling.

Katyusha's face drooped, as she thought, "I don't know. I don't think he even knows where we live now."

The rest of their thoughts were interrupted as they heard a knock on the door. Cautiously, and curiously, Katyusha went to open it. When she finally did, she couldn't believe what she saw.

He stood taller than she imagined he would, almost taller than her, and was dressed in ragged fur clothes. His face was dirty, and his silver-blonde hair was unclean, but he still looked young. His eyes were tired and exhausted, but there was a proudness in them...and something else that was disturbing. But it was still him, being recognized within a second.

"Ivan?" asked Katyusha, eyes wide in shock.

Ivan's lip quivered, and he nodded, as if he were almost ashamed to be there. But it broke into a smile, as his older 'sibling' lunged at him in a tight hug, bursting into tears as she exclaimed, relieved, "I-I thought I had lost you forever!"

"D-da..." he replied, voice raspy from tiredness, "I-I was so scared, but I knew I'd have to make it for you guys."

Katyusha called for Natalia to come to the door, and as the girl hobbled down the hall, her stoic face broke into absolute shock as she saw the most wonderful thing in the world. Screaming like a madwoman, Belarus lunged at him, cheering, not even caring that she wasn't supposed to run like that.

Ukraine wiped her eyes, "Moskva, we're so proud of you, we-"

"M-my name isn't Moskva anymore, sestra...it's Russia."

"Well, Russia...we're very proud of you, and we're so relieved to have you back."

"For good." smiled Natalia, hugging him tightly.

Neither noticed the worried, disturbed look in his eyes, as he hugged back.

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><p>As Russia stepped off the elevator onto the fourth floor, he could hear noise coming from his mother's room, two doors down the hall. He stepped in, and saw Canada and America there, the former teary eyed, and hunched by Ukraine, holding her hand. America was behind him, hand on his brother's shoulder.<p>

"I'm not leaving Alfred!"

"Mattie, please, you've been gone from your place for two weeks, your country needs you, man."

"I don't care! I'm not going to leave Ukraine!"

"Mattie..." started Alfred, trying to gently coax his brother.

"Matvey." started Ukraine, "It's ok. Your country needs you. I'll be alright..."

"Kat, I don't want to-"

"Matvey. Please...you're upsetting your brother...just go home. For a while. It will be alright, I promise."

Matthew wiped his eyes, and hiccuped, "I-I love you Kat."

"I know. I love you too Matvey." she smiled back, sitting up to lean over, and kiss him.

"Ready to go Matt?" asked Alfred, noticing Ivan standing cagily by the door.

"G-gimme a little more time, I just wanna-"

"Mattie, Ivan's here...I think he wants to spend a little time with his sister right now..."

Canada looked up, his tearstained eyes meeting Russia's scared ones. He went blank, and shakily got up. America took him by the shoulder, and gently led him away from the hospital bed. Canada didn't even look up at Russia when he exited. America looked back at Russia, and mouthed, "I'm sorry."

Russia walked over to Ukraine's bed, and gave a weak smile, "Hi."

Ukraine smiled back, "I haven't seen you for a while..."

"I know...I'm sorry." he replied, sitting down, wearily.

"Think nothing of it. I've been getting company every day...everytime I wake up, there's always someone looking over me. It's nice, but it's also kind of...creepy. Like I'm some animal in a glass jar."

"...I'm sorry, did you want me to leave?", he asked, feeling hurt. Katyusha's eyes widened, "No,no! I didn't mean it like that, I'm sorry. I-I just don't know what to really say anymore. It seems as if I have no control over it..."

Ivan bit his lip, "Just like me during...those years ago...during the...the...Holodomor"

It hurt Ivan to say those words, and it hurt for Katyusha to hear them. She took his cheek and stroked it gently, not too differently from the time she had done it in 1933.

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><p>"This is for the greater good Ukraine, it will just take time. Be patient.", spoke Ivan mechanically and rehearsed, signing off another document restricting her country, not bothering to read it. It was from Stalin. And whatever Stalin gave him, he had to agree to. That was what he was taught. He didn't have to like it, he just had to agree to it. And if he didn't, there would be punishment waiting for him.<p>

"I am _not_ going to be patient so you can kill more of my people, Russia. They are starving, and you know it."

"Don't fall back in the grain quotas, and they won't be starving. That's your problem."

Anger rising, Ukraine growled, "You have plenty. I don't. My people need theirs to _eat_."

"No, _we_ need it for _our_ future glory. A little pain goes a long way." brushed off Russia, not looking up from his papers.

"So a little pain is families dying, leaving sick orphans to roam the streets? Leaving people to fight for whatever scraps of food they can get?"

"If this is what they're reduced to..." Ivan started, hesitant to speak, but the words shook out, monotonously, "Then it's only showing their true selves."

Ukraine stared in bewilderment at the things the other nation was saying. She was enraged. Angry. Too angry to see the pleading look in Russia's eyes, begging her to help him. Begging her to understand why he was saying such horrible things.

She cracked, slamming the glass in her hand to the ground. It shattered into many small, sharp pieces. Ivan gave a shout of surprise, and hid his head into his arms on the table, shaking.

"You monster! Children are getting killed everyday for trying to live! Shot for trying to keep themselves alive! They are the people you are supposed to be helping! Not your piggish government!"

"...This is so we can live in a brighter future." murmured Russia, blankly.

"How can people live when they are condemned to die! You tell me! You shoot innocent children! You kill their parents! You kill people for trying to stay alive! How can they live if you're killing them all! How?"

Russia didn't answer.

Fuming, Ukraine asked again, "How? You tell me right now! How can they live if you kill them!"

After an even longer silence, Russia lifted his head up, and said with a shaky, broken, devastated smile,

"That's not up to me."

Within three seconds, Ukraine's open-faced hand was in post swing, and Russia was sinking into his chair, as he held his face bewildered. His cheek stung, turning red.

Ukraine breathed, voice ragged from screaming, "You can't say anything."

Soon, a raging storm was brewing into Ivan's dark purple eyes. He got up from his chair, and charged forward at his 'sister'. Katyusha flinched, fearing he might strike her back. He had never done something like that to her.

But no, instead of attacking her, he rushed right past her, running up the stairs, into his room, slamming the door. And once again, it was quiet.

Ukraine shook in her spot, and reached her hand out for the chair her brother had been sitting in. She slumped down into it, her shaking breaths dissolving into sobs. Shuddering, she could feel the aches and pains she had intensifying.

She felt ashamed. She felt ashamed of Ivan for being like this, but she was even more ashamed of herself for letting this happen. And...She_ hit_ her child. She had been so angry and hateful, and she still was...but she couldn't help but feel regret.

She cried, worrying for her people, and soon enough rose up from the chair. She saw the broken glass on the floor, but paid no heed to it. She walked upstairs to her room, hesistant to walk past Ivan's, and shut the door. Laying on her bed, she put the pillow over her head, muffling her cries.

About twenty minutes later, she heard the door to Ivan's room open, as he stepped out. His footsteps could be heard going down the stairs. Katyusha glared, imagining how he would get back to filling out those damned restriction papers, which would harm her people more. She wanted to tear them up, scribble on them in ink, anything to get Ivan to stop.

About ten minutes later, she heard footsteps thundering downstairs, and commotion. She grew curious, but didn't want to leave her room, not wanting to face Ivan for the rest of the night. However, she then heard feet rushing up the stairs. And before she knew it, her door was thrown open.

Much to her relief, it was only Lithuania. His face was frightened though.

"Toris?"

"Yetkaterina, we're calling the hospital for your brother."

"What, why?" she asked surprised, wondering why the hopsital was needed for him. Did something happen? He wasn't suicidal again was he? Did he fall and have an accident?

"Russia...he...well...he tried to cut his tongue out."

"What?" she exclaimed, shocked. Her eyes were wide, and she was starting to shake.

"He..he found a piece of broken glass, and he was sawing it through. We heard him screaming, and went in. W-we stopped him before he could, but he got the knife at least half way through, and...oh god, I just hope Estonia can stop the bleeding...It's all over everywhere..." shuddered Toris, clearly shaken up. A bit of the blood was on his jacket.

"Oh my God..." whispered Katyusha, hand covering her mouth. She was tempted to get up, and run downstairs, but after the incident earlier, she wasn't going to bother. She knew Ivan would be ok...well, she thought...

"...I didn't know tongues could even bleed out that much..." continued Toris to himself.

Ukraine withdrew her legs up, and began to cry silently once again. Toris saw her crying, and assuming she was worried about her brother said, "H-hey, it's ok. He'll be fine..."

Ukraine wasn't crying because she was worried. She cried because she knew it was her fault. She could only picture Russia on the ground, crying as the blood was coming from his mouth, and pooling on the floor, as the Baltics stared at him, horrified. Blood staining the floor, Russia's coat, the table, the wall, the papers. She could picture it. And it made her feel awful.

Russia was taken to hospital fairly quickly, where he was treated. They were able to stitch up his tongue, but he couldn't talk. Not until it healed. That was what Lithuania told Ukraine when he came back.

Russia went back to his room, and locked the door with a slam. He wouldn't come out for the next two days.

Ukraine had been outside, gleaning the fields for food to give to the orphans living by her home, when she found a folded piece of paper put on her bed. She had a hunch who it was from. Hesitant to read it, she picked it up, and slowly unfolded it, letting her breath go out. In shaky letters, it read;

_Katyusha,_

_I understand why you are angry. I understand why you hate me. I understand why you want me to get rid of these documents. What I don't understand is why you are saying this is all my fault._

_I am not the one killing your people. It is the officials killing them. I do not have the gun in my hands, or the ammunition. I have absolutely no wish to harm your people. I get sick everytime you yell in my face how children are dying. I hate the idea of people dying altogether. I love children dearly, and wouldn't do a thing to harm them. I am not the one killing children or families, that is orders of the government, not me. Those documents I signed, even if I didn't sign them, things would still go wrong. The government would still go ahead with their plans, even if I said no. Stalin...he doesn't care what I say. He just makes me sign those things so he can drill in my head that he's my superior, and if he wants, he can kill a million people. I am powerless under this. It is not me who is causing this, it is my superiors. They have made it impossible for me to speak above them, and they have walled me away. At this point, there's nothing can do._

_I'm sorry your people are starving, but mine are close to starving too. I have to help them first._

_If I could personally do anything, I would give away my personal supply of food in my pantry for your people, but Stalin won't let me do that either. I cannot speak words against him, or he will hurt my people more. I don't want to hurt yours, but I can't risk my own people's lives. I must only say what he wants, because he is watching me. Everywhere. I hear him in my head, with that mocking voice...'Stalin loves you.' 'A million deaths are a statistic' 'For the greater good.' Those are some of the phrases you've been hearing me spew everyday...they're from him. I do not want this. I want people to be happy._

_It hurts me everytime I have to say them. I didn't say them to hurt you, I said them to keep Stalin farther away from you and the others. You are my family, and I don't want to hurt you._

_But it seems as though I hurt you anyway. Saying things apparently hurts you, so I decided to cut my tongue out. So you'd never have to hear those words again. They intervened before I could, and now I have five stitches. I'll end up with some fresh bruises next week when I show Stalin those blood covered documents. But anything to show that I'm getting punished for your peoples' pain._

_Perhaps with my silence, revokement of rights, and threats from Stalin, you can stop blaming me. You've always blamed me. I could see the frustration in your eyes when the troops came in. When Belarus got sick and couldn't work, and it was just us. And then I broke my leg, and couldn't work either. You got so angry._

_Maybe you can stop blaming me, I'll stop blaming you, and I'll stop blaming myself._

_Ivan_

Ukraine crumpled the letter slightly in her hand, and felt her throat tighten. She was still so angry at Russia, but...she wasn't angry at Ivan. He was right, it wasn't directly his fault. And this whole time, she had been screaming at him for things he couldn't do anything for. And it led him to hurt himself. What had she done?

Trying to keep her crying silent, she stiffly walked out into the hall, and hesitantly and nervously, she cracked open Ivan's door. He was laying on his bed, staring at the ceiling, face blank and uncaring. He didn't even care to look and see who entered. A bottle of barbituates sat on his nightstand.

With slow, careful steps, Katyusha walked over to his bed, and leaned over. Ivan blinked, seeing her looking at him, and with a sour look, drew his knees up, and rolled onto his side, facing away from her.

Katyusha frowned, and reached to touch his shoulder, "Ivan..."

"Don't touch me." he snapped, swatting his hand at her. His speech sounded slightly distorted, his tongue still scarred and stitched.

"Ivan." she affirmed, complete seriousness in her voice. She drew in a breath as she spoke again, speaking her words carefully.

"It is not your fault for what is happening. I am angry at Russia. And I hate what's caging you. But I do not hate you. I could never hate you."_You're my little son, I love you more than anything_"You're my brother, and I love you."

Ivan turned his head up to face her, eyes wide. They began to well up, as he gave a wet choked cry. He said in an apologetic tone, _"It is for the greater good."_

Translating his rehearsed words as an apology, Katyusha stroked his cheek, the same one she slapped earlier, "I know, I'm sorry too."

* * *

><p>"I...I can't believe I said such terrible things..." murmured Russia, head cradled in his hands.<p>

"You didn't have control over it. I don't blame you anymore. I forgave you long ago, Ivan."

She probably could never forgive Russia, but she could forgive Ivan. That was good enough for the both of them.

Katyusha then weakly ruffled Ivan's hair, "And I shouldn't have blamed you for the things you couldn't have predicted or controlled. I still regret that, and I'm sorry."

Ivan looked up, and gave a worried smile. Had this been bothering her all these years?

"You shouldn't have to apologize for that." he reassured gently. He then thought a moment, and said quietly,

"I remember crying at Stalin's death. But...I'm happy he's gone. I couldn't stand being controlled by someone who didn't value a human's life properly."

He then gave a worried glance, "That doesn't make me a horrible person, does it? Glad that someone's dead?"

"Ivan, that monster hurt both our peoples. He didn't care about the deaths of millions, and so why should we care about his?"

Ivan remained quiet, and after a few minutes, sat up, and looked at his mother. Smiling a little, he realized her hair was a mess. He took out one of her hairpins, and flipped her bangs a little. She raised an eyebrow as he childishly hummed, and fixed her hair. Putting the pins back in, he smiled again.

"There."he hummed, "Now you look pretty."

Katyusha smiled, and pat Ivan on the shoulder. She often joked that he would make a wonderful hair stylist, giving those who were ailing a little makeover every so often. The last time she saw him doing that, it was when Belarus had measles.

And speaking of the younger nation, she had just walked through the door.

Natalia's blue eyes gazed with a killer's aim on her family. She slowly walked over, and sat down on the other side of the bed opposite Ivan. She stared at him with an intent longing.

"Hello Natalia." greeted Katyusha with a smile, eyes brightening to see her younger child. Natalia did not return the cheerful sentiment to her, and instead gazed at her brother. She asked very bluntly,

"How long have you been here?"

"I've been here for about thirty minutes." He answered, not certain as to where Natalia would be going with her conversation.

"And you're going to stay until visiting hours are over?"

"I would assume so."

Natalia gave an irritated breath through her nose.

Ivan frowned slightly, "Natalia, why don't you stay here for a while?"

She sniffed, "Unless you're here, I don't really see a reason to."

"Katyusha gets lonely."

"Her Canadian boyfriend can visit her."

"He can't come every day. He has his own country to attend to."

"Well so do I."

"You live closer. You can visit Katyusha easily. And I'm sure she'd love to see you more often."

"Well, she'd better get a good look now, I'm not coming again."

Katyusha was about to open her mouth, to change the subject, and ease the tension between the siblings, but Ivan frowned, and said, "Natalia, I think you should be a little more considerate of Katyusha's feelings."

"Why?"

"Because you should."

"What if I don't want to?"

"Well, that would be very sad to see."

Natalia sneered and gazed at Katyusha, "She's an even sadder sight. She's wasting your time."

Ivan glared, and got up from his chair, and with a stern louder-than-normal voice scolded, "Alright, I've just about had it with you disrespecting her! You don't even know how much she's given up for you, and you haven't even thanked her for it. I find it sad that with all she's tried to do, and the effort she's put in to make your life a decent one, you still grow up an ungrateful brat!"

"Ivan..." started Katyusha, trying to get him to calm down. Natalia stared at him wide eyed, taken back by his harsh tone of voice.

Ivan gave a heated breath through his nose, and sat back down in his chair. He then gently spoke to his mother,

"Katyusha, I think it's time you tell her..."

"Tell me what?" asked Belarus, curious and feeling vulnerable.

Katyusha sighed, and collecting her thoughts, nodded.

And as the afternoon went on, Ivan and Natalia sat in silence, as Katyusha retold her story, leaving the Belarusian to revealed secrets and memories.

As the sun set, Katyusha finally finished speaking. Natalia sat in silence, face blank, but eyes confused and surprised. She shakily got up.

"I...I see. I...I think I can understand your relationship with Ivan better now..."

She took a step back, still feeling incredibly vulnerable, "I...I think I'll return in the morning."

And without another word, she turned her heel, and made a quick exit, leaving the other two to sit in silence.


	17. Goodbye to Nobodies

**Ok, so this is pretty much the last chapter, but I'm making an epilogue as well. So stick around!**

**For some reason, I don't think people were alerted regarding the last chapter being up. There was a chapter I added last weekend, but nobody got notified it seems, or reviewed...**

**Well anyway, read and review, or I'll use a deux au machinima ending for the epilogue.**

**WARNING: Character death**

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><p>The following morning, Ivan returned to the hospital, and found Natalia sitting by his mother's bed, watching her sleep. Instead of a cold, leering stare, it was a calm gaze, as the younger girl sat deep in thought. Ivan slowly walked in, and sat down next to her. Natalia looked up at him, and spoke very softly, with inquiry.<p>

"How long did you know about this?"

Ivan chewed his lip, and replied, "For about a month."

Natalia nodded, and remained silent for a few moments. She then cleared her throat, and asked very calmly.

"Ivan, could you...um...leave me in privacy for a few minutes? I want to talk to her."

Ivan paused a moment, then nodded, "Da, of course."

Warily, he got up and exited the room. He remained outside the door, against the wall, just in case Natalia did something. After her reaction yesterday, he wasn't sure if he could trust her to remain alone with his mother.

Natalia nudged Katyusha gently, and the sickly woman opened her bleary eyes. She looked up, and gave a confused, groggy look as she saw the Belarusian's face.

"Belarus?"

"Hello." spoke the other blankly, no expression in her face. Her lips were held tightly together, as she contemplated over what to say.

"...Um...regarding yesterday...what you told me Katyusha...I-I mulled it over...and I just have one question..."

The Ukrainian gave a curious gaze, "Yes?"

"Well, my mother...the one who I was born from...did she ever get to hold me?"

Ukraine looked down, trying to remember. She shook her head, and said sadly,

"I don't think she did. As soon as you were born, I had you in my arms, trying to clean you and everything. She passed out. It was too much for her...she didn't wake up."

Natalia's eyes widened a little, then sank back down to normal, "I...I killed my mother."

"Natalia-"

"I_ killed_ her! As soon as I was born, I was a murderer!", exclaimed the other, self-realized horror in her face.

"Don't say things like that Natalia. You know just as well as I that medical care and birthing were very unknowledgeable and risky. Things just happened as they came along."

"...B-but, it was my mother...I never got to know her..."

"Natalia...remember what I told you? I raised you as my baby too, along with Ivan...I-I just couldn't tell either of you, because I wanted to keep you safe. I raised you so you could have a family."

Natalia looked away, as Katyusha continued weakly, "Your birth mother died before you opened your eyes, that's a fact. She never had a chance to be truly loved. That's why I raised you in such a way. So you could have a chance like that."

Natalia looked back, eyes wide, and ready to cry. She felt absolutely guilty for what she had said to Katyusha.

"I...I'm...I'm so sorry mother."

Katyusha smiled sadly, "Natalia, you can call me Katyusha still, I-"

"N-no. White Rus might have been my birth mother, but _you_ are my _real_ mother. You gave up so much for Ivan and me, and I've never even thought of thanking you...or...or apologizing for being so ungrateful."

Wiping her eyes, she smiled slightly; it was a genuine smile, not a twisted grin, "T-thank you mother, for everything."

Katyusha's lip quivered as she smiled too, reaching out to hug the other, "It's okay, and you're welcome."

And to her surprise, Natalia hugged back tightly, feeling warm in her mother's hold. Ivan peered in curiously, and as he saw the embrace, he couldn't help but smile a little.

* * *

><p>The next few days were disheartening for Ivan, as he visited the hospital every day. And every day, Katyusha was getting weaker. She couldn't get out of her hospital bed anymore, her legs too shakey. She still smiled, but both Ivan and Natalia could tell that it was becoming more straining for her to.<p>

One morning, Ivan got to the hospital very early, to find his mother wide awake, curled into a withdrawn position, eyes weary with exhaustion. Ivan sat next to her, violet eyes reflecting worry.

"Are you alright?"

"I wasn't able to sleep last night. At all."

"How come?"

"The window was left open. It was too cold..."

"Why didn't you ask someone to close the window for you?"

"I-", before Katyusha could continue, an uniquely chilling gust of air blew through the open window, waving the curtains wildly. She wrapped her arms around herself, to reduce a shiver, as Ivan frowned. It wasn't supposed to be this cold out. Getting up, he went to close the window. But as he began to slide it down, he was blown back by a strong wind, the ice stinging his face. As he sat on the floor in shock, mouth agape, he could see snowflakes billowing into the room. A mocking, airy voice sailed in the air,_ Is it time for the family reunion?_

Ivan glared, violet eyes livid, "Get out, General Winter. You're not welcome here."

A 'tsk' was punctuated by another wisp of cold, _That's no way to talk to your father, boy._

Ivan growled, "I'll be dead before I acknowledge you as that. You're not my father. My father died when I was born."

_What, that 'Savva' boy your mother was infatuated with? Well like it or not, we're the same. Without me, you'd never even be here. Be grateful._

"Great, you win the damned 'Father of the Year' award, happy?" snarled Ivan with contempt. He would be more than happy to take out his trusty faucet pipe and smack the living daylights out of the season.

Winter manifested himself into his human appearance, and walked past Ivan who glared at him hatefully, and over to Katyusha's bed. She frowned steadily, a strange sense of strength gleaming in her normally calm eyes. She wasn't going to let Winter do anything to her or her family.

_Is poor Ukraine sicky? Do she have a cold?_ asked Winter in a childish, mocking voice.

Voice husky and threatening, she growled, "Fuck off Winter."

As Ivan's eyes widened in shock at his sister's bite, Winter's narrowed, _Do you now see the consequences of your stupid mistakes? Within days, or hours, you'll be dead._

Ukraine kept her glare, "I'm not afraid. I've lived a long life. Maybe I'll get to see Savva again."

Winter chuckled cruelly, making Russia shiver, and Ukraine staying stoic, _That's quite laughable. You won't be seeing him when you're dead. He's mine. I took him over. That stupid little 'Savva' character I had was simply a shell that I have discarded, and is my trophy. _

Ukraine glared deeper, "Let me see him."

Winter paused, _Excuse me?_

"Let me see him. You still have him as yours, but let me visit him. For just one minute."

_You're kidding, right?_

"For one minute. Just so he can see his son. So I can at least say goodbye."

_You're pathetic. Why would you think he'd even want to see you?_

"The last time I spoke to him, he was sorry. And because you've caged him away, he still is, isn't he?"

Winter remained silent. The wind was starting to die a little.

"Well?" Katyusha asked again. Ivan stood in his spot on the floor, frowning with confusion.

Within a few seconds, Winter's human form disappeared, and a younger man stood in the swirling mass of wind and snow. His brow was furrowed with confusion, and his eyes showed slight hurt to them.

"Bunny, why did you stop looking for me?" the boy asked, only slight emotion in the voice.

Katyusha gazed at him, blue eyes regretful and reminiscent, "I had to. I had to carry on. I had to raise a child, because I promised my mother. And...and you were gone."

The boy looked down, eyes blank yet thoughtful. His grey gaze then caught on the surprised, wide-eyed look of Russia. His violet eyes were examining the stranger with confusion and shock.

Savva took a good long look at Russia. Starting from his boots, up to his silver-blond hair. What caught his attention most was those violet eyes. They were wide like a child's and uniquely cosmic.

Ukraine tilted her head, and gave a weary smile, "That's your son, Savva. He looks a lot like you."

Savva paused a moment, unreceptive. He shook his head, "He looks more like you...He looks...he looks nice."

Russia was left just staring at the strange man in front of him. This was his father? He looked so young still.

Ukraine's eyes were mournful as she gazed at Savva, who was destined to be imprisoned as a past life of an old season. She murmured, "I'm sorry Savva."

Savva's eyes, for once, were not completely blank. The bittersweet emotion in them was like a candle, flickering to die out. He gave a half hearted pout, and opened his mouth to say something. But before he could, his image, like a hologram on a projector, faded out with a burst of snow, revealing a glaring General Winter. Without saying anything, the General angrily turned his foot, and became a gust of snow, flying out the window, for good.

"Hey come back here!" cried Ivan, as the spirit flew out the window out of sight. Katyusha shook her head, a bittersweet, pitying smile on her face. There wasn't anything she could do for Savva anymore.

"Just shut the window Ivan."

"But he-"

"Savva's not going to come back again. And if you close the window, neither will Winter."

* * *

><p>About an hour later, following the encounter with Winter, Katyusha was beginning to spiral downwards. Her energy was nearly gone, and she was trembling horribly in dull pain. It hurt so much, but she wasn't going to go just yet. She was almost ready, but she would wait until tonight. So she could say her goodbyes.<p>

Natalia arrived a little later, and struck up a conversation with her family there. Ivan was able to speak fine, but Katyusha's comments were short and weak. She just lay back on her bed, eyes half lidded with weariness, as she listened to her children speak, smiling weakly.

Ivan propped up some pillows, and brushed his mother's hair. Natalia took one of her hair ribbons, and tied it into her mother's hair.

"It's to make you happy." she explained. Katyusha smiled again, knowing that it was a successful idea. She could feel one part of her hair tucked up tight into it, imagining how it might have looked silly, but she didn't care.

Belarus and Russia stayed long into the night, being allowed by the hospital staff. They must have been able to tell that there wasn't much time for their mother, and that time was precious and short. As they talked quietly to Katyusha, and to themselves, they could only watch as her strength was beginning to dwindle. Ivan's eyes were burning, but he remained composed.

Around midnight, Natalia fell asleep in her chair. Ivan didn't want to wake her, and just continued to sit, keeping his mother silent company. The dying Ukrainian was shivering slightly, as if she were cold. Without thinking, Ivan climbed onto the hospital bed, and under the blankets. He could hear the soft breathing of his mother, as she fidgeted slightly, turning around to face him.

She gave a small smile, and weakly reached her arms out to hold him. He was too big now to hold like a baby, but he was still able to be cuddled.

She murmured slightly, "Ivan?"

"Da?" he asked quietly, watching as she grew even weaker.

"D-do you remember how I told you about when I put you to sleep with a lullaby...even though I wasn't supposed to?"

"Da...I remember..." he stuttered, eyes beginning to water.

"That was what made me realize...that for all the times I have called you brother, they wouldn't have amounted to the first time I called you my son."

Ivan's purple eyes leaked, as he gave a wet sniffle, and nuzzled his face into her shoulder, "The first time I called you my mother was more important than any time I told you 'I love you sister'...And what will be an even more important thing for me to say: I love you mama."

With a hurt, but relieved smile, Katyusha's eyes were beginning to close, too heavy to stay open, as she gazed at her boy's hurt eyes, but his loving smile.

"No matter what was said or done Vanya, you've always been the one I loved the most. And you'll always be my child."

Taking another look at her boy with her own eyes, she closed them, feeling proud of her son growing up to be someone she could at least be proud of. As her eyes closed, she barely saw him as a grown international power that she was cuddling, but a small baby, on the day she first cradled him. She could hear a voice like honey, a motherly voice from long ago, coo gently, "You're a good girl Yetkaterina. _A good girl_."

_Thank you mama._

"Ya tebya lyubyu, Mama." cooed Ivan, with a choked sniffle. Tears were rolling down his face, as he cradled his mother in a returning embrace, feeling her warmth. His tears were beginning to soak into his scarf.

He didn't let go, even after she had stopped breathing.

* * *

><p>Ya tebya lyubyu- I love you<p> 


	18. Epilogue

**Thank you for everyone who followed and supported this story. Love you all! Prepare to see some more work in the future.**

**Read and review or I'm turning this story into a terrible sitcom script.**

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><p>As the sun rose the next day, Russia stared out his window, weary violet eyes wide and calm. He gave a small smile, looking at the glowing rise in the sky.<p>

_Good morning Mama._

He tried to imagine that the sun was a place of warmth and happiness and that Katyusha was resting there comfortably. If she had reached there yet.

Ivan had returned home a few hours ago. He had to carry his sleeping sister Natalia home, not waking her once. He put her in her bed, and wrote a letter for her. He felt guilty for not being there when she would wake up, but he had to return to the hospital to go through the procedures people normally did when a family member of theirs died in the hospital. He feared the note to Belarus would not be as sincere as it could be, but it was the best he could do in such a time crunch. It read:

_Natalia,_

_You fell asleep, so I took you home._

_I'm so sorry. Katyusha's gone. She went peacefully in her sleep. She wanted you to know that she loved you very much, and hoped you will be happy in the future to come._

_If you want to come by my house later to talk or grieve, you can. The door's unlocked..._

_Love,_

_Ivan_

In the short time, Ivan also had the responsibility to call Canada. That phone call lasted a good hour and a half, both men crying, and Ivan having to hang up with a hasty 'I'm sorry' because Matthew was crying so hysterically. The Russian felt terrible, but he knew that soon enough the Canadian would be on a flight over, so he could comfort him better then. After the phone call, Ivan got into his car, and mindlessly drove around the dark deserted streets of Moscow, gazing at the orange streetlights illuminating the lanes. He had the radio tuned onto some American music station, playing some soft, melodic, forlorn acoustic tunes. They left him feeling melancholy, and even more exhausted.

Ivan still ached slightly, because as he was left to comfort his friends and family, who would comfort him? Everyone loved Katyusha, and would be so busy grieving, they probably wouldn't first think of consoling the Russian. The next world meeting the following week would be very difficult for Russia to sit through. But for the moment, overall...

He felt a sense of peace.

For the past three weeks, he was left to sit and watch as his mother struggled through the last moments of her life, sick and tired. For thousands of years, she had to conceal a dark painful secret from him. And she gave up so much, willingly and unwillingly for him, so he could become the nation he was today. She was so pained during her life, that death was almost a relief for her. Ivan knew, from the relaxed expression she wore post-mortem, that she was content. And if she was so, then he could be too.

He slumped onto his couch, letting his heavy eyelids sink down. He desperately wanted to sleep, yet he felt it would be rude of him if Natalia came to his house weeping to find him asleep on the sofa. Conscience weaker than his biological needs, he conked out within two minutes.

When he woke up about two hours later, he found Natalia holding him tightly, her eyes red and worn. The note he left her was crumpled in her apron pocket.

* * *

><p>"And that's when I said, 'Well you're no prize either honey!'" recounted Poland, animatedly telling one of his gossipy stories.<p>

"Feliks, we've heard that one already." sighed France, stirring his french vanilla latte passively.

"Well fine, I'll tell something new. So I was like, driving down the highway when some chick in a huge-ass Russian car-"

"Dude, get some new material. I mean, NEW. Not chick flick crap. And Russian cars aren't that big." chimed in America, dumping more sugar into his milky white mocha drink.

"Oh let him tell it." chided Russia calmly, taking a small sip of his hot milk tea, "And to be honest, they can get just as big as your SUV's can."

After the world meeting had ended, England, America, France, and Poland had gotten together to carpool to a small cafe. And they openly invited Russia to come along. The meeting itself was very quiet, and solemn, some sympathetic glances sent towards Russia and Belarus, as well as Canada, who was absolutely silent for the whole meeting, his face withdrawn and tired. Russia had comforted him earlier, but it would still take longer to go through the grieving. The absence of Ukraine was very disheartening for them, remembering Katyusha as a kind, caring person. When someone did ask regarding the nation itself and if it was still Ukraine, Russia had nodded, and said he would take care of it.

"Well, they don't have the steering wheels screwed up."

"Well, it's not our problem you dumb Americans drive on the wrong side of the road." teased England.

"That reminds me." smiled Russia, "A few years ago, he nearly got run over when he tried to cross the street. He was screaming and yelling at the driver so much, everyone thought he was a lunatic."

"It wasn't that funny man!"

"Oh yes it was." smiled Russia smugly. He could feel the heaviness of his chest lifting very lightly, leaving him to feel less burdened.

After the coffee date was over, Russia and England were both exiting around the same time.

"Are you doing well Ivan? I'm so sorry for your loss." he spoke gently, catching the Russian by the shoulder kindly.

Ivan smiled sadly calm, "Da. I am." his eyes melancholy, holding back tears, "I...I do not wish to think of it as a loss. I know my sestra is happy."

He wiped his eyes quickly, "And that makes me happy..."

Arthur smiled sympathetically, and gave him a friendly one-armed hug, "You're welcome to stay with one of us if you don't want to be alone. _We're your friends Ivan_."

Ivan grinned warmly, feeling touched by the notion that the normally grumpy British man considered him a friend, but shook his head, "I appreciate the offer, but I think I will decline."

Arthur nodded, and with a wave, went on his way. Ivan watched as he walked off, feeling grateful of his friends' support for him during this. As soon as they heard the news that his 'sister' had passed away, messages of sympathy were flooding towards him. When he had woken up the next morning, at least fifteen deliveries of sunflowers were stacked on his doorstep, nearly tripping him when he walked out. The phone was ringing endlessly for the next three days. So much that finally, Ivan had to disconnect his phone so he could sleep. Even Poland and Prussia were sending him mail (not even hate mail!)

Ivan regretted that he had even predicted that nobody would care about him. He realized that his mother had left an impact in more ways than one. The love they shared together had spread to the others, and it was returned. Ivan was not alone at all.

He felt loved.

* * *

><p>The sea was very calm, even on such a cold day. Chilling winds sifted through the Russian's wispy light hair. His large purple eyes gazed out calmly onto the sea, reflecting the calm waves, emotion blank in them.<p>

His pink, worn scarf danced slightly in the seabreeze, swinging by his legs a little. He held it close to him, breathing in its comforting familiar scent. The musk of his home, spices, and flowers were so discreet but enveloping in it, his security 'blanket' long before he could remember.

He reached into his pocket, and held a small round white shell in his gloved hand. It was chipped with age and fragility, but for something so delicate, it looked so sturdy in its worn longevity.

Looking back out at the sea, Russia walked towards the tide, until his boots could press into the wet sand. Kneeling over, he planted the shell loosely on the ground. He stepped back onto the dry sand dune, to watch the tide come in.

The first wave, it just vieled over, leaving the shell wet. The second time, it pushed the shell forward with the foam, and ended up sucking it greedily into the sea.

Russia watched as the sea took one of the last remnants of his mother away.

_'We must always return to where we came from.'_

He could feel the familiar chill of ice blow past him on the seabreeze. He turned to see the gray transparent coat of the stone-like man he loathed. But instead of hatred, he blankly stared at the General, asking silently, '_When will you return to what you came from?'_

The General did not respond, simply watching as the water rolled in the sea.

_'Where did you come from anyway_?', he asked silently, as the season ignorned him still.

"When will you go back to who you once were?" he finally asked aloud, but quietly, "The person I never got to know?"

_He's gone, fool._ dismissed Winter, _You wouldn't have liked him anyway._

"He'd sure as hell beat you." he spoke back, but not as much hate-laced as he had wanted.

_He wouldn't have been able to raise you anyway. Even if you did get to know him, you'd end up hating him for what he'd let you become._

"What?" asked Russia, wanting to know.

_It matters no more_, dismissed Winter again, _What's past is past. Your mother raised you by her choice, and it cannot be changed._

"I-"

_Move on already. Get on with your future_, bit Winter, sounding annoyed.

Russia said nothing, finding himself without a retort. He simply turned and began to walk along the shoreline, the horizon gray and cloudy, but blank and calm.

Soon enough, by his side, walked the General. Both were silent, not saying a single word as Ivan walked along the beach. They knew each other was there, and stayed by each other, but did not clearly acknowledge their presence.

And neither acknowledged the unseeable blank-faced spirit with the coldness of snow, but the innocence of child. And neither noticed the self-thought nobody walking alongside him, with eyes of blue and her hair stained silver by the snow.

**The End**


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